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Why did they not give me a proper reason for breaking up with me?

18 Answers
Last Updated: 06/16/2020 at 11:02am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Tracy-Kate Teleke, PsyD, M.A., LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I assist adults and couples in CA experiencing relationship challenges and interpersonal struggles including anxiety, depression, and a myriad of other life challenges.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
August 11th, 2015 10:52pm
Because it is a coward's way out. Also, if you really cared about me, you'd give me the reason. If no reason was given, you have just proven to me that you really didn't care about me at all.
piag860517
July 1st, 2016 9:55pm
Nobody need to explian their feelings to others; people just dont own you an explanation; we all want to know what happend? why they leave us; but the other person is entitle to leave you with out explanation; nobody is obligated to love you or explain their decisions; when is over is over; stop thinking what went wrong on focus on yourself; close the circule the they he dump you; you dont need to know more, you are perfect; and if your ex didnt see it; is his problem not yours; dont overthink of that; the answer you are looking for is never going to come for you...or is not going to make you happy, move on kido.
slightlyodd99
August 31st, 2015 12:12pm
There could be a lot of reasons. Sometimes the person itself is confused on their own feelings, and didn't want to continue until they figured something out. Granted I could just be making assumptions, but the bottom line is that in life people do come and go and that's okay. You have ups and downs, you lose and you gain, that's just how the world works. Please know that I completely empathize with you, but also know that through the passage of time you will feel better and breakups are something we can all relate with and we all go through. Hope you feel better! sorry if this answer was inadequate
SchizophrenicPianoRap
June 30th, 2015 5:17am
They probably did not want to hurt you, especially when they already broke up with you. They do not want you to think it was your fault, which it wasn't.
lovelyLynx18
June 21st, 2015 11:23pm
Did you ask them for a reason? If you did and they won't answer you then they probably don't have a good reason or a reason they are embarrassed to tell you.
Greatlistener87
November 16th, 2015 6:17am
Sometimes the reason people breakup for are just ridiculous. But the whole idea is that the person who broke up with you was not interested to make it work in the first place and so shouldn't you waste your trying to make sense or anything else out of it by yourself. Always remember in a relationship it takes 2 hands to clap not 1.
Bulelo
January 5th, 2016 12:57pm
They probably don't have one; some people are too ashamed to admit that they just didn't want to be in a relationship anymore and therefore cannot find a reason to break up. Don't feel as if you're to blame or that you are unworthy for it!
Anonymous
June 27th, 2016 6:43pm
They may have been confused about why they wanted to break up with you, they may have just known something wasn't working and wanted out of the commitment.
Anonymous
June 30th, 2015 6:15pm
If they don't give you a proper reason for breaking up on you than they weren't the right person for you, you can do better than them, I promise.
gentleSky95
February 5th, 2018 8:29am
See either the person had some other priorities.or the person started liking someone else and had no guts to face u and tell the truth.or he might have disliked something about u and wanted to stay away from you for that reason
Anonymous
September 26th, 2017 11:07pm
Your ex possibly didn't give you a good reason for breaking up with you because he/she doesn't have one. It's a possibility that they are going through something and don't want to share it.
Anonymous
May 31st, 2016 12:23pm
sometimes things doesn't need to have a main reason. just accept the fact that he wants you to set him/her free.
RibbonOfLight4
May 15th, 2017 4:22am
There are many reasons why people don't explain much. They could just want to avoid more drama. They wouldn't like to hurt you more. Or maybe they don't think they reasons would be enough for you. They could just want to avoid more conflict. They could even be afraid. Or maybe they don't really know how to explain it.
Anonymous
January 30th, 2018 10:47am
They were probably too nervous to confront you. Obviously some people feel really guilty when they have to break up with somebody, because they don't want to hurt anybody. Its probably because even though they wanted to break up, they still cared about your feelings.
plushUnicorn4912
June 16th, 2020 11:02am
It could be for multiple reasons. It could be that they don't know the exact reason why. They just know it was wrong for them to continue on and didn't want to say that because it doesn't seem like a valid reason why to break up. It could be that they know why, but they still like you and don't want you to question yourself. It could be because they don't like confrontations and are scared to see you hurt. So it's easier for them to avoid the talk. Most of the time, it's them not knowing how to deal with the situation and wanting to avoid it as much as possible.
YellowDaydream
June 7th, 2016 5:26pm
They probably are confused or don't want to hurt you. Could be also because they don't want to be seen as the "bad guy". Some just don't feel it anymore. Emotions and relationships are sadly complicated..
naturalbeauty
May 13th, 2015 4:25am
There are different reasons but i believe a reason could be because they didn't exactly know themselves and felt like they could not give you a good reason.
MonBon
January 25th, 2016 12:22am
Sometimes there isn't a "proper" reason. We always want relationships to end definitively, but in reality the reasons for a relationship ending can be very subtle and abstract.