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Why does my girlfriend hate me all of a sudden?

197 Answers
Last Updated: 09/03/2021 at 8:17am
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My worldview offers a systems perspective that values diverse clients and their struggles. I believe supportive and nonjudgmental therapeutic relationships empower clients.

Top Rated Answers
August 24th, 2018 11:06pm
Did you ask her? Try to remember you did something maybe it's because of that. If you didn't do anything maybe you've forgotten something like a birthday, monthsary/anniversary. Remember that she probably have a reason to get mad at you. Some girls tend to be like that when they see you talking to other girls, your forgetting a special occasion, you did something that made them mad, she saw something that you did that she doesn't like, you said something very mean and hurt her feelings. To make her stop hating you maybe try buying her food and give her some love and support.
September 9th, 2018 2:02pm
Maybe she doesnt hate you. Maybe she is just scared or confused, but doesnt know how to channel these emotions. Try to assure her about your emotions and intentions. Ask her did you do maybe something unintentionally wrong, did you say something. Or, maybe, she is seeking for attention, for help in something but she's embarrassed to talk about it. Encourage her to tall to you. Maybe you will find out something new about her, or even about yourself, about emotions and struggles in your lifes. Noone cannot just hate someone all of a sudden. I hope it will end well, for both of you.
October 4th, 2018 10:12am
If a person is realizing a sudden change in their partners actions and feelings then they might want to talk to their partner about it. When talking to them, they should always ask if they are doing something to provoke them for feeling that way. If they claim that nothing is wrong with the other person then it might be a good time to ask if something else is going on that is upsetting them. Sometimes what happens is people will have alot going on in their life and take it out on the wrong person.
October 26th, 2018 11:42am
It is important what happened differently in recent times. If is a major change that you are being through of maybe you have a difficult discussion with her, that it is still unsolved. Also, it is important to ask her if she is going through a difficult time (a job/school/college). Maybe is hard to be patient and clam right now, but all of these will pass. Negative emotions are a normal part of life that you ahve to conform with, they could be constructive and with a positive outcome from all of these. Stay strong and remember it is all part of life.
October 31st, 2018 4:22pm
The best way to find out the answer to this is to ask your girlfriend. Perhaps phrase it in a more positive light with the focus on how she is feeling or how you are feeling e.g. You seem angry lately, have I done something to upset you? You could also ask how she feels the relationship is going? Questions that show you are coming from a place of concern and love for her rather than accusations will help make her feel more open. If you find it hard to talk about then consider writing her a letter or even asking her close friends or family if they know anything.
November 7th, 2018 3:12am
Do you really know she hate you or you assumeing why not tey talking to her to find out is there a misunderstanding i know you can do it just dont talk with anger.once you sit down and talk you might get a better understanding why it might seem that way and when you talk make sure not to trigger a debate that could throw the subject off hand and try to understand each other point of view because that make a good bond and also helps create a better relationship and main one let each other express themselves
November 8th, 2018 5:42am
It all depends, sometimes we have break ups but you may have a make up. Maybe rumours went around, maybe she feels she needs time apart. No madder what it always turns out right, if she breaks up that just means you will find some one else that loves you even more! But always no you could kinda be wrong, you can't say she hates you without proof, I mean your pro bully right but maybe your a bit off maybe something happened in her home life that does not involve you and she needed some time alone, no matter what I can't tell you for sure what the answer is.
November 9th, 2018 12:17am
She may be in the process of disconnecting and trying to find something wrong with you. Some people tend to break up with someone in their minds before doing it verbally and physically. She may be on the brink of telling you and just doesn't quite know how to say it because she knows it will hurt you. Try asking her why she's suddenly changed how she acts towards you, or if there's anything specific that you may have done to make her react this way. Communication goes a long way. Its better to talk to her about it than to sit and continue to wonder.
November 11th, 2018 11:47pm
This is a difficult question because it depends on the situation. It could be because of many reasons, you could have cheated, you could have been dishonest, you could have said something wrong. Another reason could be that she is going through things, girls tend to clench up and be very moody when they are going through issues. Don't take it personal, also hate is a very strong word I wouldn't say she hates you, I would say that she is either in two states: she doesn't like you anymore, or she is having a bad time. Some girls like it if you try to help them when they are going through hard times, but some will get very annoyed and even more angry or depressed. With girls its best to just let them work it out on their own unless they ask for help.
February 21st, 2019 4:56am
Depending on the reason it's so sudden, she may be feeling down about something you did, or something that's bothering her and the emotions are coming out aggressively on you. She may not know how to feel and she's conflicted inside, naturally making her appear hostile. Have you tried to talk to her about it? Is there a reason why your girlfriend would feel this way, that you aren't acknowledging? There are so many reasons that cause a person to suddenly act out, but I think if you analyze the situation, you can probably pinpoint the root of the issue.
April 25th, 2019 5:05pm
I'm sorry to hear that. There could be a lot of reasons she could be acting the way that she is, but I can't imagine she hates you if she is still with you. I recommend talking with her if she's willing to at least do that and do you best to give her time to open up if to you and express your willingness to work on whatever issues there are if there are any. Sometimes it's difficult subject matter and it may take her time to open up, one of the best things you can do is show a willingness to solve the conflict, show that you care about her, and show that you respect her space and her feelings. Though this answer is convoluted, I hope it at least helps give perspective and I truly hope that you can solve whatever problems you two are having.
May 15th, 2019 7:14pm
i dont know you or what you have done but i do know that u should talk to your girlfriend about this. what do you think youve done to her to make you think that she hates u? was you texting another girl? or was you talking to her bad? there are different things that she couldve gotten mad about but because i dont know her or you there isnt much that i can say about it. im not supposed to give advice but i really thing you should ask ur girlfriend about this information that you told me
June 6th, 2019 5:39am
It may not be you. She could be stressed about external factors in her life and taking it out on you. Talk to her and ask her why she feels this way suddenly. Usually she will be willing to talk about it and you're more likely to be able to find a solution or common ground on which you both can stand and figure out "what next." She also may need space, sometimes all people need is space sometimes or maybe you're giving her too much space. The only way to find out what is truly bothering her is to talk to her about it.
July 7th, 2019 4:30am
I would like to answer this by saying "People are complicated". Perhaps first of all you should try to find out if you said anything which she didn't like. If that's not the case then it might be possible that she is going through some rough phase of her life(maybe depressed) and she might appear cold and distant which may make you think that she hates you. It can be possible that there is a miscommunication between you and her. But if she really means it "the hatred" for you even when you did nothing wrong after you have analyzed and contemplated about the situation then I think it is not your fault. You should consider talking to her about all this and why she has these negative emotions for you but at the same time make sure you don't over-pressure her. Trying to be a good listener is going to help you and then asking follow-up questions in such a way that make her realize about her irrational and sudden dislike for you.
August 4th, 2019 9:42am
I have been through a similar experience and know what you’re going through. Most of the time it is us (you and me) thinking ourself that our boyfriend or girlfriend may hate us, when in reality they really don’t. Maybe you’re experiencing anxiety or self confidence issues and are seeing things that may not be true. Or maybe you are experiencing depression and you are shutting yourself down and not living in reality. I myself have been through the same thing and I know that it can be hard to cope with. But just know that she most likely does not hate you and there is always someone available to talk to.
August 24th, 2019 3:32pm
Relationship issues are often complicated, it may not be that she hates you, but maybe she has something on her chest that she can't seem to say, maybe she feels she'll be too much, or that you can or will not help her with whatever it is she is holding back. It could also be very normal issues like late night sleep, bad things at work, parent issues, lady problems or just general frustration. In most cases like this there is something unsaid or unspoken. Even though she expresses anger or discomfort with your current relationship, it may not mean that she hates you.
October 13th, 2019 5:40pm
You assume your girlfriend hates you and you were not expecting her to. What is she doing or saying that leads you to believe this? All is speculation until you speak with her directly. No one can know for certain why anyone does anything except the person themselves. If you truly did nothing in your view to hurt her, approach her calmly and request to listen to what happened. It's possible there was a misunderstanding, or you are internalizing some emotions she is showing about something else. At worse, you did something to upset her and cannot see what it is, which doesn't mean it isn't still a big deal. You won't know until you speak with her. If she refuses, give her some time. If she is being abusive, set boundaries. Consider how she can better express her anger in the future, and how you can better respond to it. Compromises and communication are key. Be well.
October 18th, 2019 6:03am
this is really subjective! for all you know, your girlfriend could display 'hatred' towards you without realising it herself! or perhaps she was just feeling a little emotional or perhaps a little disappointed and/or displeased at something that you did. it's hard to really read someone's mind and understand what they're thinking. if you're sure of this relationship and you want to work things out, communication is perhaps one of the most important components of a successful relationship! talk things out with her. if you've talked things out and she has verbally said that she hates you, ask her why and i believe that'll answer your question more accurately and quickly! all the best.
November 8th, 2019 7:34pm
She may be feeling anxious or stressed. It may have nothing to do with you in particular, but her anxiety and stress may be manifesting itself as anger/annoyance and possibly directed toward you because she is comfortable with you. Has she had any big life changes recently? A new job/loss of job? Maybe a personal loss of some kind with a family member or a friend? Have you asked her if there is anything that is stressing her out that you can help with? That may involve you giving her space if that is what she needs to heal right now.
January 23rd, 2020 2:17pm
May be because you may have hurted her unknowingly and didn't even realize it.or she may have various reasons for hatred. She may be having mood swings or channeling her angry on someone towards you . She might be frustrated about her work ,health,family,friends etc . She may be expecting something from you and giving you hints which you are not getting. You could have been misunderstood . She might be possessive about you. She might be expecting love and care that you haven't noticed. These are the above cases if she loves you and you are not attentive. If it's not from above list then it can be a prank or she really want to break up.
February 1st, 2020 1:26am
Love is the most complicated human emotion out there. When others do not love us in the way that we love them it can destroy our trust and self confidence. It might be that your girlfriend does not know that you feel this way. She may be irritable due to stress in her life from school, work, friendship problems, etc. There is only one thing you can do to find out how she really feels: Ask her to talk about how you've been feeling on a 1:1 basis. Doing that will be hard but it the only way to come to a resolution that works for everyone.
March 21st, 2020 12:26pm
I understand that you are feeling confused. when I was in this situation, I asked myself what may have caused this to her about how you feel about things happening in your relationship. talking to her can really help the situation. talking about this can reduce the amount of confusion you have been feeling. I believe that you can handle it better. if i was in your shoes, I wouldnt have handled as great as you are doing right now! what makes you think that she hates you? or what kind of changes have been occuring in her behaviors?
April 18th, 2020 1:14pm
this question depends on the situation and what happened and i guess only you both would know the answer to that so openly communicate with her if you feel this way and find out why if you feel like something is up. Communication is really important in relationships and if you feel like there is something not right it is better to confront her about it. Hope things go well for you and get better. Keep positive and do things you like to keep yourself in a good heads space. You might want to try doing some journalling as well.
April 25th, 2020 8:09am
There are many variables to emotions. She might not hate, she might just be dealing with something that is painful and is causing her to lash out. If she is verbally abusive or physically abusive, then seek help. But if not, I suggest asking her yourself. There's no harm in asking if anything is wrong. But be kind, and supportive. In the end, it's her who know her best and you who knows you best. Look within yourself if you think it has something to do with how you are or aren't acting. Every person has room to improve. Even the "best" people.
May 17th, 2020 6:08am
While it might seem like a partner distancing themselves from you or reacting in a way you may not know them to do usually means they're feeling animosity toward you, this isn't always the case. Have they gone through a major life change? Is friction popping up in their other relationships with friends and family? Open the lines of communication with her and talk about any stressors that could be affecting your relationship and/or ability to connect with her. She'll likely be thankful for your thoughtfulness. If you express your concern rather than holding it inside, you'll feel much better in the end.
May 29th, 2020 1:11am
Hate is a strong word, and I don’t think there is an easy or one “right” answer for this question. However, in my experience if there is a sudden relationship change, analyze the past and see if there is an event that correlates with the change. Maybe she is mad because of a misunderstanding, but rather than bringing it up she doesn't because she may think you already know your transgression. No one is a mind reader but people tend to think that everyone thinks the same way they do. In other words, If you see an event from one point of view, try and take yourself out or the situation and see how your point or view changes when you are detached from the emotional side of the event. And if all else fails, ask her what is up! Maybe it has nothing to do with you and she is having a hard time at work or school or with a friend! She will be glad you cared enough to notice, and to ask. Just, don’t ask in an accusatory way; you could say: how have you been feeling lately, you seem a little update or irritable, what can I do to help?
June 13th, 2020 8:33am
A relationship is like a seesaw, there are two people tightly coupled together so that the moods, feelings n desires of one affects the other. Very often, when one partner feels elated n joyful, it is at the expense of the other. The other partner may not share the same sentiments but had to compromise in order to make the other partner happy. A balance or equilibrium is very hard to achieve because it involves both parties watching out and checking what the other is really feeling. However, many a times, couples take each other for granted and do things based on their assumptions and expectations without bothering about the feelings of the other.Hence, little by little, things add up and what seemed like a trivial event suddenly escalated n exploded to an argument, a fight or possibly breakup. As such, nothing happens suddenly.Hate does not appear overnight, it arises from a number of events that fuels the feeling. Finally, you may find that your partner expressed hate towards. And due to your own "busyness" you failed to spot the signs of her unhappiness and felt that her hate appeared out of nowhere. In reality, this feeling of hate has existed for some period of time.
July 2nd, 2020 8:29am
It probably has nothing to do with you at all. Sometimes we assume that we are to blame or the cause of other people's feelings. Is she struggling somewhere? Work, family, other relationships, mental health issues? Find a quiet moment and ask her. Really listen to her and try not to judge. Don't come at her with accusations because this could make her more defensive. It has to be said that you could be the source of her irritation, but an honest chat where she feels able to explain herself without being judged may help you understand her a little better.
August 14th, 2020 4:36pm
I am sorry to hear that you feel that your girlfriend hates you all of a sudden. This question is hard to answer without knowing context of the situation. I do think it would be best for you to talk to her and let her know how you are feeling about the situation. She could be going through personal things herself and it is coming off as hate toward you. It is best to have a conversation with her and be open when listening to her response. This means just letting her share how she feels and helping her talk through the process. She may not hate you at all and if she truly does it might be best to talk about it and either fix it or get out of the situation.
August 28th, 2020 6:49am
There’s a thin line between love me hate.... and I believe trying to communicate is the first thing needed , to gain understanding of what has occurred. If you are able to retract recent events to help identity the issue. Offer support and empathy and love to get her to open up about what has occurred. See what you can do to help her. There could numerous reasons for the sudden change which needs to be addressed to help you both move on from the hate. I always say communication is key within relationships . And so is understanding and empathy