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I was bullied to the point I got PTSD and severe depression. My parents think it's irrelevant to go to therapy for something that happened four years ago. So what do I do?

18 Answers
Last Updated: 03/31/2020 at 8:50pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Melissa Hudson, MS Ed, PhD(c), LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I work with clients of diverse backgrounds on a multitude of concerns. My approach is, at times, directive, yet always curious, nonjudgmental, collaborative, and validating.

Top Rated Answers
PoppyW
January 18th, 2015 12:15pm
Do not undermine the aftermath of what bullying can be done to your life. Bullying can cause serious issues following the act being carried out. Examples are like the ones you have pointed out (PTSD and severe depression), eating disorders, and anxiety. I would urge you to seek help in finding closure to the matter. Take good care of yourself!
positiverainbow83
June 11th, 2015 10:42pm
Bullying can affect you for the rest of yourlife. And you are the only person who can decide if you need therapy or not.
KatHellsing
August 5th, 2015 3:42pm
Try and make your parents understand that bullying is very serious and will leave very traumatizing emotional scars. Severe depression and PTSD is serious and should be treated as soon as possible. If your parents still don't think you should see a therapist about bullying, then try and get them to let you see one for your severe depression and PTSD (since you have that currently, then they might let you). Then if they let you see a therapist, then you can tell the therapist everything that happened and how it's bothering you. They keep everything confidential, so if your parents won't believe that the bullying isn't bad, then they won't have to know.
Clouder
August 8th, 2015 7:29am
Therapy is relevant whenever you're struggling and want/need support. It doesn't matter if the events happened four years ago, or four decades ago. The sooner you can get help for PTSD and depression, the better. If your parents are unsupportive, it might be worth exploring other options, such as seeing a school/college/uni health service. Even if they're unable to help you, they should be able to refer you to someone who can. You did the right thing by asking for help. I know it can be disheartening, but keep asking until you find someone who gets it. You don't have to go through this alone.
Spiderman93
January 28th, 2015 4:37pm
if you believe therapy will indeed help you, go for it! it doesnt matter if it happened 4 years ago or 4 days ago. talking about it to someone may actually help you. dont let your parents make the decision for you. you know what is best for you! best of luck!
Payje
February 7th, 2015 9:56pm
Educate your parents about PTSD, as well as the often long-lasting effects of bullying. It sounds like they do not fully understand what you are experiencing. After you educate them you might have a more honest conversation about the merit of therapy.
Waterbear
August 17th, 2015 1:22am
Explain to them that you are suffering now no matter what the cause was or when it happened, and you need help. Try getting a teacher or other adult to explain it to them if you can.
Kha1eesi
November 2nd, 2015 12:36am
PTSD is neither irrelevant nor insignificant. Even though it's been a while since the incident, not having any way to process that trauma can be damaging and detrimental to both mental and physical health. If you are in a position to seek therapy, and you feel it will improve your quality of life, it never hurts to try.
WendyBird15
November 30th, 2015 6:17pm
You know yourself. Better than. Your parents. Know you and if you feel that you need professional. Help to overcome the PTSD and depression. Then you should push to see a therapist..
sunshineScenery15
December 8th, 2015 2:12pm
seek help from friends. It isn't irrelevant to be fair because it can be a reoccurring theme and bullying someone impacts that permanently.
Cryrose1
February 16th, 2016 6:24am
Maybe try speaking with a school counselor they can maybe help or help lead you to help and inform your parents of how important it is. I'm sorry you feel this way but your not alone.
peachesandlove
March 1st, 2016 2:11am
Seek help regardless. Your family does not define you. There are tons of helpful guides on 7cups and online.
cosyheart21
September 19th, 2016 9:26pm
Even though your parents may not think you had ought to go to therapy, if YOU feel like you should go, or want to go, then you should. It's so important to take care of yourself, and put yourself first. And even if other people don't understand, that's on them. This is about you and how you feel, and no one else.
BetterTogether101
November 20th, 2017 8:00am
You can try to explain to your parents that it is in your best interest going forward in life to go to therapy because you feel that talking your problems out with a professional will be beneficial for you and help you see things more clearly and that as their child they want what is best for you in the long term and you think this is what would be best for you in the grand scheme of things. Unfortunately parents are still human which means they may not always see eye to eye with their child for reasons that are not always clear at the time, but your request for therapy does not necessarily have to be tied with something you know they do not see a point in agreeing to. What you decide to speak about once in therapy is within your control and perhaps with the right support you can manage to get through the past experiences you went through. If financially your parents are not willing to fund your therapy request regardless of the reasons behind it, you can try to utilize resources available to you free of charge--school counselors, university therapy resources, online supports, etc.
Anonymous
January 9th, 2018 1:40am
It is never irrelevant to seek help. Even if it was four years ago, PTSD can show up at anytime. Check our section on depression for some tips and help
Jennifer164
March 5th, 2018 11:17am
By letting them know what kind of difficulties and issues you are facing because of PTSD and severe depression.Maybe show them the meaning,causes,symptoms and examples of both the disorders.In case you can reach out to another adult who is understanding, ask them to explain these concepts to your parents.
Kristinakogaa
June 25th, 2018 8:41am
PTSD is something that is not always taken seriously. If your parents won't take you to therapy, talk to someone! Friends, family members, and many sources that can help you online!
Mobariz
March 31st, 2020 8:50pm
It is never irrelevant to seek help and professional help is the best medicine for PTSD. I have come to understand PTSD to be an illogical thinking condition, it’s an illogical reaction to an illogical event. We are not designed to experience illogical events without mental pain being associated with them. Try to get an adult or a teacher to talk to them, maybe they would explain better how your case is, and explain to your parents that bullying or not going to a professional therapist can lead to very traumatizing emotional scars.