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What does a bully get out of bullying people?

43 Answers
Last Updated: 04/19/2021 at 6:42pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Polly Letsch, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I provide non-judgmental, person-centered, objective therapeutic treatment for individuals of all ages to improve social, emotional, mental and other areas of functioning.

Top Rated Answers
December 28th, 2014 5:22am
Bullies are often having issues with their own life. They often find themselves powerless in their own situations and discover they can control others if they bully them enough. It's mostly just that feeling of power and/or pleasure they get out of it, along with the potential sudden respect it gives them among their peers, that makes them bully more. Shortly said, it gives them the feelings of power and respect they should be getting from their friends/family instead.
November 22nd, 2014 7:35am
Peace. Most bullies are unfortunately people who have suffered really tragic experiences and they try to take it out on the people around them. They must have been labelled 'useless', 'horrible','good-for-nothing' and they want to inflict the same pain on others, They feel that by doing so, their pain is lessened and feel good. But the grave fact is that this is not true. Nobody should be made to feel bad or told bad things to. It is truly horrible that they were demotivated in their growing up stage, but instead of bullying they should slowly lift themself up and try not to inflict pain on others :)
August 18th, 2015 8:18pm
People bully because they don't feel good about themselves. Sometimes they are continuing the cycle, by repeating what they've been through. Either way, what they say to you is usually a reflection of how they feel about themselves and they are just projecting it onto you.
August 31st, 2015 3:07pm
In reality, nothing. But they feel a sense of satisfaction. THey feel stronger and powerful when they bully someone. THe reason why they bully is because they feel insecure and by bullying others and pointing out their insecurities and making them feel bad makes the bully feel good. Like a sense of accomplishment and that they are liked and that they aren't insecure. It makes them feel better about themselves at the expense of others. Which is not cool or nice or good AT ALL.
November 22nd, 2014 11:03am
People like to insult others and make them feel inferior, to boost their own self esteem. this a way of the society.
February 24th, 2016 9:56am
People bully others because they have a certain imbalance in their psyche that can only be fixed when they bully a powerless victim. A person might become a bully in order to feel worthy, by devaluing the target, the bully feels superior and so maintains his self-worth and protects his ego. Insecurity is another big reason for bullying. Because bullies feel insecure they try to create an illusion of being in control by bullying a weak victim. From the outside, bullies might appear strong and in control but from the inside most of them feel insecure, inadequate and inferior. Another reason for bullying is attention seeking. Some people become bullies because they are desperately in need of attention and bullying, in this case, is the only thing they can do to bring some attention to themselves.
March 15th, 2015 3:51am
Temporary satisfaction that he/she is in control. Other reasons may be: for the feeling of superiority, or just to get noticed, and/or have a place in the social chain. Many bullies doesn't realize the amount of harm they're causing, and some think that they are justified in the situation. But really, bullies are also very insecure.
January 8th, 2015 10:59pm
A lot of the time, bullies bully is because they aren't happy with themselves and they feel the need to make someone else share their pain.
April 26th, 2015 4:38am
A bully gets satisfaction of making someone suffer or hurt more than they might be hurting. It's like revenge.
June 23rd, 2015 12:51pm
It's a clear cry for help, whatever he\she lacks are filling it up with bullying, we should feel sympathy and try to help them as much as we can.
November 23rd, 2015 2:45pm
Maybe they want to feel better about themselves by degrading other people. Just do not let them ruin what you are.
December 7th, 2015 12:28pm
Truthfully speaking, they don't get anything positive out of bullying. They only get more enemies, haters or relationships that aren't based on what they should be based on. Maybe bullies get a sort of release when they bully other people. The anger, pain or stress that they can't vent out at home,school or anywhere else, is being released when they bully other people.
November 21st, 2014 4:46am
May be that someone told them to stop, but also some bullies are guilty too! Remember they are persons to and even though they are bullies and may be really mean, we all have feelings
January 3rd, 2015 12:18pm
The feeling of superiority. I think they feel like they are bigger than everyone else which makes them crave that power resulting in bullying.
April 23rd, 2015 6:42pm
maybe fun, peer pressure i guess or maybe cuz they were bullied and ppl taught them that way depends..who ur looking after
June 18th, 2015 3:33pm
Most of the time, bullies have their own problems. It could be problems like self esteem, anger management, abuse, etc... By putting others down, they get a bit of a confidence boost. Sometimes, bullies don't KNOW that they're bullies, because they think that their actions are justifiable. For example, people often insult and demean others online for bullying, but they don't realise that bullying bullies makes them a bully themselves!
July 20th, 2015 1:51am
A feeling of power.
July 5th, 2016 7:52am
A lot of times a bully was bullied themselves or doesn't really have a good home life. A bully may get the attention they don't get at home. It all boils down to attention. A bully is seeking attention.
November 21st, 2014 10:07am
Satisfaction for their insecurities. When someone isnt feeling good about themselves, they tend to take it out on others.
June 4th, 2016 8:12pm
A bully is normally someone who has been bullied before therefore they find it necessary to hurt others.
December 16th, 2014 9:06pm
Mental content, because violence is the way he chooses. Rather he doesn't know what to do. So maybe this is innate human default ?
- Expert in Bullying
December 21st, 2014 7:53pm
I think bullying is a way of making a person feel powerful, when they are feeling hurt or weak themselves. If a bully is labeled, or such behaviour is already expected of them, it can be hard for them to "step out of character".
December 24th, 2014 6:35pm
A bully feels that they need to bully people because they are unhappy with themselves. When they take those negative emotions out on somebody else, they feel above the person they are bullying.
April 12th, 2015 5:42pm
My thoughts are that bullies feel really terrible about themselves and the way that they feel better is to put others down and make others feel bad about themselves so then they begin to feel better about themselves
April 16th, 2015 6:08pm
A bully feels empowered when he or she belittles someone else. They make someone else feel small in order to make themselves feel bigger, if that makes any sense. They need to feel better about themselves, so they will point out another person's flaws (or what they see as flaws) in order to project a better image of themselves. Sadly, it usually only makes the bully look like, well, a bully.
May 8th, 2015 6:29pm
People usually bully when they are going through so much themselves so they will take there anger out on other people
July 7th, 2015 6:12pm
When the bully bullies someone, its usually for enjoyment. The bully may have low self esteem, and take it out on others.
May 17th, 2016 10:38am
Bullies are usually those who have been bullied in the past. Bullying other people makes them feel superior and that they are on top.
July 11th, 2016 12:18am
The reactions. I know it's stupid. But I think it makes them feel better. I think it makes them feel like that they are better than you. But I'm not all that sure.
July 26th, 2016 10:17pm
Little more than personal gratification. They enjoy the power they can have over others. This almost always starts from early childhood experiences. Such as being bullied themselves