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What's the best way to get over being bullied about your looks as a teen? I am 50 and still will not go to class reunions because of how I was bullied in high school.

15 Answers
Last Updated: 01/12/2021 at 4:47pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Sarah Robb, LISW-S (Licensed Independent Social Worker, Supervisor Designation) and LICDC (Licenced Chemical Dependency Counselor)

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

Difficult roads often lead to beautiful destinations. Life poses many challenges. Learning to face, cope with, and resolve these challenges can increase our resilience.

Top Rated Answers
OakShield15215
February 17th, 2015 1:39pm
Look in the mirror, and give yourself a compliment each day. At least once. Take selfies, slowly build up your inner confidence.
Anonymous
June 24th, 2015 7:37pm
I sadly know how it feels being bullied as a teenager and wishing to avoid the situation now as an adult. The best way you can look back on it is remember that you've made it this far and moved on past the bullying and have bettered your life beyond that experience. It is probably most likely they have forgotten about that but you can always talk with them- teens are quite immature and often do regret choices they made. But if it still makes you uncomfortable perhaps talking with a professional can help you overcome your fear of your past trauma.
PushThroughItAll
September 23rd, 2015 4:28pm
Most people might have forgotten of all the bad things they said, started, or did to you by this point in time, or have hopefully matured to the point, and have kids of their own to realize that it was not the correct thing to do back then.
TaintedHaze
March 1st, 2016 6:30pm
I'm sure the way they treated you has stuck with you to this day, but honestly most bullies don't linger on what they did for very long unless if they have a very strong conscious (and if that were the case they probably wouldn't have bullied you in the first place) Chances are they have either forgotten about it or have grown past it. They may even make a joke and say you look a lot better now. Most teenagers don't look glamorous, and they probably realize now that puberty hits everyone differently and that's just how the human body works. Their kids will probably go through it too, awkwardness and all.
MTsquared
March 21st, 2016 2:01am
Well I try to think that "I look good no matter what, who cares what others think, they just don't know what it is like to be as good looking as myself" I think that if you try it and really get your self to believe that than you will be happy in your life and be able to go to the class reunion knowing that your looks only matter to you and to other who really do care for you!
Yaboyash2
April 18th, 2016 1:37am
Just remember that you are the way you are, and no one can change that. Also, you don't have to go somewhere that you're not comfortable going to. Do what you're comfortable doing.
SkiesFreedom
July 25th, 2016 8:08pm
Now that is not an easy question to answer. Bullies have several reasons why they mock somebody. That could for one be personal discomfort, or problems the bully can't cope with in any other way. It is not a nice thing to get bullied over your outer looks, however it does occur way too often. Personally I have experienced that it is important to have people around you that treat you equally and that understand you. It is important to stay in contact with people and not isolate yourself and feel bad, because that is exactly what a bully wants: He/She wants you to feel deeply bad about yourself. To go against that I personally would try to see myself as an equal person and for the most part LOVE yourself, because only if you love yourself and are balanced out you have the energy to say: "You know what: They are wrong. I am beautiful the way I am and no one can affect that opinion" Well many may say its egoistic to love yourself but I say it's strength to be happy to be who you are wherever you are. So let's say you would attend a reunion, and they would make fun of you again (which I don't think is the case, because they probably have noticed by now that bullying is not okay in any way) just say straight up: "You will not make me feel that way again. I am who I am, and I am HAPPY about that!" So to put my answer short: The best way to get over it is talk to someone about it who understands and supports you, and do what it needs to love yourself, to love your body the way it is, to love all the character traits that were given to you.
Anonymous
October 3rd, 2016 2:36pm
You just have to be confident! You can do it!! People are rude, they don't care about other's feelings. Just own it
SpreadYourWingsAndLearnToFly
October 25th, 2016 4:41pm
Good question to answer here! My father is a little bit older than you and explained something similiar to this question. You don't have to go to a class reunion, but it could turn out to be a lot of fun. Right now, fully mature adults would realize that none of that matters anymore. What matters most is that you have a reliable job status, and you are living life the way it should be lived.
saketbindu
November 8th, 2016 4:35pm
It is ok to be bullied but it is not to effect it. Think of yourself today. Do you think it it is still harrassing you.
amazingLove26
April 12th, 2015 9:00am
I think the best way is to go, find out where those people who bullied you are now and look at where you are. You have probably gone a heck of a lot further than they did.
alanbabani
May 8th, 2015 12:45pm
The best way to get over it is to not take care about that circumstance and live your life as a new person.
Summertimebreeze
February 29th, 2016 2:34am
Being bullied is horrible but it's how you respond with that really matters if you give a reaction they're going to keep coming back but if you rise above then they're just gonna back off
CalmCourage
January 11th, 2021 11:57pm
I am sorry to hear that you were bullied over your looks, I know how that can make you feel. This is gonna sound a bit weird of a method but hear me out.. So I would suggest, writing a letter to all the people that used to bully you. (don't worry you're not going to send it) Tell them how it felt at the time, the emotions it made you feel, how it still affects you even now. You can write about specific events also. You then look at what you've written and see the emotion that you were going through at the time. Now I want you to imagine giving that old version of you the love you needed at that time. As you send that previous version of you the love, imagine yourself healing that previous version of you. Now with the letter, you go out and find somewhere very safe to burn that letter. And let go of that emotion as it burns. Let me know how that goes.
Anonymous
January 12th, 2021 4:47pm
As an elementary student I was picked on because I was different from other kids. Looking back, I wish I could have told my younger self how little their opinions mattered. Growing up I have met so many kind hearted people and surrounded myself with them, as opposed to people focused on their outward appearance. I know it’s cheesy, but what’s on the inside matters much more than what’s on the outside. What aspects of yourself do you really like? Find something to love about yourself, both inside and out and grow from there. It can be incredibly freeing to let go of what others think of you!