Why do I always succumb to the bullies when I hate them so much?
Last Updated: 06/14/2016 at 12:19pm
Penny Dahlen, Ed.D., LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
I am committed to helping you find your passion, heal old wounds, and flow smoother in all aspects of your life path! I use a compassionate listening approach.
Top Rated Answers
Walk away from it if you know you will be doing something bad. The best thing to do is to keep calm even when it's hard
I guess you are afraid that they will bully you even mor but ignoring them makes them bored and uninterested in bullying you.
We succumb to them because they make it so easy to. Sometimes it's easy to walk away if they talk about you but you know it isn't true and you have people in your life who love you and know the truth. But then the time that you do succumb it is when they say something that is true or some what true and you snap. It's never easy to walk away from them if that happens, especially if you don't have support from anyone.
Perhaps you may be looking for strength external to yourself, in order to find strength to stand up (not just stand up to bullies alone). Find strength through kindness, such that the enmity you have towards other people will make them gravitate towards you because of your kindness. Usually people who bully are not able to manage their emotions (whether that be ego, anger, low self-esteem) and thus try to bring down others, to make themselves look bigger. Be smart and be kind.
In my personal experience, I learned to succumb to them due to my self-loathing and the fact that my school didn't try to fix the problem. It's common for someone to accept the abuse you get, especially after a long period of time -- and you tend to learn to numb yourself to it. This is a terrible way to deal with bullying, and nobody should be able to experience it; it can lead to self-loathing and rather traumatizing events that can lead to the dangers of being triggered easily. You should try to speak to your parents or a school counselor about these issues ASAP.
It might be a mental thing. You may seem to feel like you hate them, but you also seem that part of you is scared they might hurt you or part of you has been damaged in a way where you may be like this.
Because I'm afraid of what might happen if I get up in their faces and defend against myself. I'm scared what they might do to me back if I even say a word back.
If you succumb to the bullies when you hate them so much, it's a reflection of your character that means that your empathy levels are high. I believe there's a condition called stockholm syndrome too.
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