Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How do I stop being jealous of others success?

146 Answers
Last Updated: 03/23/2021 at 8:38pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Cynthia Stocker, LCSW,

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

My approach is direct, kind, honest & collaborative. My clients appreciate that I help them in a way that cuts through the jargon and gives clear explanations.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
October 29th, 2015 1:29am
You can learn to stop being jealous of other peoples success when you take the feeling of jealousy and use to accomplish something you want to. Try making them jealous of what your'e accomplishing,
comfortableParadise21
October 29th, 2015 1:31am
It helps to focus on what you have achieved yourself. But I don't see happiness as being measured by success, more by the friends and family you have, the things which get you up in the morning, the things in your life you are proud of :) There's a saying, 'Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.' It can be so damaging to compare yourself to other people. They may seem successful but they no doubt have flaws in other areas, everybody is different:)
CaringCupcake23
October 29th, 2015 11:13am
Jealousy is a difficult topic, and often seen as very taboo. Oddly enough, overt jealousy of others' bodies appears to be accepted - you often hear people saying things like 'I wish I had her thighs' or 'I wish that blouse looked as good on me as on Maisy'. Jealousy of others' success, however, is often frowned on. Personally, I consider the damage jealousy does to the beholder to be the biggest worry, as it follows a vicious cycle of comparing oneself to others. That is where reducing jealousy begins - in evaluating your own life and spotting your own success stories, your own abilities, your own potential. Try to reflect on what you have overcome, how hard you have worked for what you have, and also remember we live in a world of social media where only highlights are commonly portrayed. So just because that former highschool classmate looks as though their life is now perfect because they have money, but maybe they are working a 60+ hour week and don't ever see their kids. You can't have the good, e.g. wealth, status, without the bad, e.g. demands on your time, stress, significant accountability. The grass may always seem greener on the other side, but it is quite possibly just an illusion.
RealEmpathy
October 29th, 2015 1:42pm
Realize that there is no limit to joy, and that another's joy does not diminish my own. If anything, joy expands!
Anonymous
October 29th, 2015 2:01pm
I stopped being jealous of others success by focusing on my own accomplishments and looking back at everything i have overcome.
Kevinkrish
October 30th, 2015 11:21am
You can't really stop being jealous of others, its one of the emotions we feel and what makes us who we are. The best way to handle this is to understand why your really jealous and use what you learn to make a positive change. (*^_^*)
Anonymous
October 30th, 2015 3:53pm
Think of all the amazing things you can do that others may not be able to do, and most of all, accept who you are, and be proud of that person.
Anonymous
October 31st, 2015 9:05am
By not caring about others and valuing oneself. Everybody is important and has his own special ability to do things. You gotta figure it out and just be yourself. You will find yourself being happy instead of being jealous of others, :)
Anonymous
November 1st, 2015 5:57am
You think about what you've accomplished. Others have their own achievements and goals, and you have yours. Their successes will not affect your successes unless you let it.
fancyRainfall33
November 1st, 2015 6:09am
Make a list of the things that you are proud of accomplishing. It can be as simple as paying the bills on time or being able to get through your day. It does not have to be anything huge. Be proud to be you, and love yourself. Everyone's journey is different and unique.
PhoenixB
November 4th, 2015 4:11am
Focus on your own. If you see someone succeed on a test and you get jealous, make sure to study harder next time so you can have the best grade in the class. Negative emotions can always propel you to do positive things.
CleanSlateNate
November 4th, 2015 3:37pm
First, you need to acknowledge your envy, then, recognize that pride is just the flip side of the envy coin, replace your envy with compassion, let your envy fuel self-improvement, and MOST importantly, don't forget to count your own blessings. Best wishes. - Nate
Anonymous
November 4th, 2015 11:11pm
you shouldnt be focused on other people success, your success should be on your mind, you are a star!
Anonymous
November 5th, 2015 4:15am
Being jealous is normal to most of us, to stop it will be nearly impossible. What we can do is to change the jealousy into something positive. Like being happy for that person instead.
genialLizards
November 5th, 2015 6:57am
You have to realize that you can be succesful too! I've been jealous of my brother but I realized I can do things too! So can you!
Namaste2015
November 6th, 2015 12:46am
Focus on yourself and what makes you happy. Everyone is here on Earth just trying to survive. We need to be able to find happiness and success within ourselves, and not measured by what others are doing. Try to stay off social media for a little bit helps too.
beautifulOasis25
November 6th, 2015 6:09am
Try not to focus on what other's have, and instead focus on what you have. Instead of thinking, "Wow, her car is so new and shiny and cool and nice", think, "Wow, my car is pretty retro and they don't even make it anymore! And I just got it cleaned so it looks all shiny and it's so cool!".
optimisticBreeze43
November 6th, 2015 6:54pm
Start focusing more on your own success! Instead of trying to compare yourself to others; compare yourself to what you were yesterday.
blackHorizon52
November 8th, 2015 3:00pm
Take it as a competition.by refering him as your rivalry. Like cristiano ronaldo and messi do . They are friends too but on pitch they are enemies.
loki1234
November 11th, 2015 11:06am
we should never compare ourself to any one , and we try to focus on our work and always remember God made us to live our life in our way .
LuwUrZelf
November 14th, 2015 7:09pm
You have to appreciate more your own success and if you need you can take others for examples for yourself.
Destiny07
November 15th, 2015 1:16am
To stop being jealous of others' success the best thing to do is just to think about where you are in your path to success. If (and only if) you work hard you will be there soon and won't need to be jealous of anyone anymore.
wonderousSunshine82
November 15th, 2015 5:16am
Focus on achievements that you have made in your life and give yourself praise for them, no matter how small they are!
Anonymous
November 15th, 2015 9:41pm
Focus not on what other people have but on what you have. Your family, your friends, your career and your future. Everyone is successful in different ways. Set small goals and achieve them and you will notice a great improvement in your day to day life
dancingTurtle59
November 18th, 2015 6:10am
we get what we work for if we want to b successful we have to set goals and reach for them one goal at a time
Anonymous
November 18th, 2015 7:42pm
You can stop being jealous by really thinking of your successes. Maybe you're not having any now, that's okay. Look in the past, or plan in the future. A success can be something you really want to do, like get married, or adopt a child. Planning for future successes can help you forget abut other's successes and, in turn, will make you stop feeling jealous.
Anonymous
November 19th, 2015 5:28am
Fight any potential urges to inflict harm. Understand it is only natural to be and there are other qualities/characteristics about oneself that could trigger jealousy. Talk to someone trusted if possible.
interestingBerry24
November 19th, 2015 8:50pm
Be content with what you have. Everyone is blessed just to see another day. If your not happy work harder to succeed.
Anonymous
November 20th, 2015 12:03pm
by focusing on your own. I know, short answer, I just don't know what else needs to be said here.
Anonymous
November 21st, 2015 2:18am
I've found that jealousy tends to happen when I stop looking at my own personal value and start looking elsewhere. In a world full of advertisements and social media, it's hard sometimes, to focus on what matters. One thing I find myself doing when I start to feel "jealous" or envious of others is I try to take disconnect and step away from the environment that triggers my jealousy. If it's facebook, I log off or I unsubscribe myself from other people's news feeds (in extreme cases). If it's someone at work, I try to take a small holiday (if I can). It's important to step back and put my life into perspective. To focus on myself and the good qualities I have to offer others. Logging on to 7cups and the supportive online community, I find helps. I also find that it helps to talk about how I'm feeling to a trusted friend - to get the reassurance I need to know that I'm good and "successful" in my own way.