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How do I tell people I'm depressed?

51 Answers
Last Updated: 06/01/2021 at 4:53pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jennifer Fritz, LMSW, PhD

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

Day to day life can be stressful and overwhelming and my strength is assisting my clients in a supportive, empowering and practical manner.

Top Rated Answers
devilsOrchestra
January 22nd, 2016 2:44pm
just be open and let people know how your feeling, you should never be ashamed of how you feel and you may be surprised as others you know could also feel the same way and are afraid to speak out about it.
Disney
January 24th, 2016 10:28pm
You can either bring it up causually or scheduled meeting. You should be able to toalk to them comftably if you can.
onthatgoodvibe
January 27th, 2016 2:45pm
Well from personal experience i found coming right out and telling people that i'm depressed only made things worse for me because people talk. They would say things like " She's asking for attention" or "She's faking it" which only mad me feel worse. So i find it is best to keep your personal life to yourself except for the most important people in your life such as guardians, best friends, and anyone else close to you. When you do tell the people close to you just be straight up with them tell them you're depressed and you felt comfortable telling them. Most of the time doing this will lead to them asking you questions about depression and what its like for you (this is a good thing).
mochaFloatlover
January 28th, 2016 9:44pm
I used to tell people my story first and get them to understand what has happened to me, then I would tell them about how I felt during that time and after. If I had scars I would explain to them why I felt like I needed to do it (the physical pain was better than the emotional, the need to feel live, etc) and hopefully they understand.
blanket7
January 30th, 2016 6:15pm
Be direct and don't sugar coat it or make it sound better or worse than it actually is. I've told a friend I was depressed before and the way I did it was just be being honest and telling her that I really wanted her help to try and get better. Hope this helps:)
lizziecazs
January 30th, 2016 11:33pm
The same way you can talk about people if you had diabetes or any other disease, the more natural and at peace you are with your condition the better
Anonymous
February 5th, 2016 11:14pm
Get into a comfortable and quiet environment where you won't be disturbed. Start by talking about what is happening in your life and what you are feeling. Remind them that you just need support getting through the tough times.
Kuvira14
February 6th, 2016 2:02pm
That sounds like a hard one. Find someone you trust, and tell them. If you can't tell them face to face, write them a letter explaining.
Junta
February 7th, 2016 7:52pm
The best way to let people know you are depressed is to make your voice heard. Speak up for yourself. Make your voice heard!
elliejade
February 10th, 2016 5:36pm
For parents, writing a letter telling them how you feel if you don't want to tell them in person. If you do, sit them both down and straight out tell them. For friends just tell them that you are feeling a bit down or show them signs and same for the school.
KintsugiLady
February 10th, 2016 10:43pm
I think it is a matter of trust, first of all. There's people we don't really trust with this kind of info, for whatever reason (for example, in my case, my mother thinks that those who seek psychological advise are weak and unwilling to face their issues, which makes no sense, but she's the most stubborn person ever and I haven't told her I suffer from depression: I don't trust her reaction). I think they are best let go. The other people, though? Slowly. Do not burst it out first thing, but work up to it. Instead of "Hey, I have something to tell you: I suffer from depression.", think more along the lines of "You know I've been feeling low lately, and I'm at a point in my life where I need your support: I've been diagnosed with depression and it is very scary." Also, consider why do you want to tell them. What are the reasons that make you feel like you have to share this? That will give pointers as to how to approach the actual conversation: do you just need to get it out of your chest? Do you need support? Do you want them to do a specific favor for you, like making sure you eat well, or that they get you out for a walk every day? Do you think they *need* to know, even if you don't really want to tell? Each situation is different, and needs a slightly different approach. But, in the end, just breathe deep and do it. The weight you'll lift off your shoulders can be huge.
VioletRose33
May 17th, 2016 3:19pm
As someone who has struggled with clinical depression, finding a way to get out from under the rock is scary and most of the time hopeless. Depression can be a debilitating exsistance and there becomes this duality of the desire to reach out and the desire to hide. The first step is not only to accept you're depressed but to know and understand you need help and that you are not alone. So often we hide these feelings of depression because we don't want to burden others with our "problems" or make others feel sorry for us... Or turn others away. There's a difference between being sad and clinical depression that many in our society don't understand. It's easy for someone who's depressed to get discouraged when they're not understood. My encouragement to anyone who's depressed is to know its temporary even though it may seem like the world is crashing in. Having hope is an essential part of getting help and accepting help. At times we tell the wrong people, so telling the right person - someone you can trust, rather than telling all of Facebook, is something to strongly consider. You may not get the response you're looking for when you reach out to a general audience of "friends". So who you tell matters significantly in how you get help. So how do you tell people you're depressed? By accepting, hoping, and sharing with the right person/people.
Anonymous
May 31st, 2016 4:53pm
What is causing you to hold back? Admitting this depression is one of the bravest things someone can do. So I commend you on wanting to reach out for help! It is one of the things that can help you from the negative spiraling thoughts. I would start of with those who you love and trust first and experience the vast amount of love and support you're going to get. Then go from there. Also make sure you understand that you dont have to tell those you dont. Nothing is wrong with that.
KindWinter183
August 8th, 2016 9:36am
Sit down with a trusted person, especially one you know will listen and understand. From there, explain to them whats going on and how you are feeling,and try and educate them that this is not temporary sadness but a condition that needs love, support and understanding. Do some research yourself before you get into the conversation. Be patient with the other person as they might not immediately understand, take your time and dont rush the conversation feeling like youre wasting their time and look like you feel sorry for yourself.
Anonymous
September 5th, 2016 6:36pm
I feel down sometimes and tired. Sometimes I sleep long hours. Sometimes I can't sleep. I also feel like having none energy .
Anonymous
May 1st, 2017 2:16am
I've found that it's best for me to get to know a person pretty well before I tell them about my experience with depression. Once I feel confident that they will treat me with respect and understanding, then I feel more comfortable sharing that part of my life with them. And at that point, I find that simply and honestly sharing my personal experience usually goes well. It can honestly be hard to talk to people about experiencing depression, simply because you can never be completely sure that they will respond in a supportive way. If possible, I try to avoid talking about it with people who I feel won't be compassionate about it. But just know that if someone does respond unkindly, it is never your fault. You are trying to share part of your life with them, and if they don't respond well to that, it reflects a lack of compassion on their part, not any sort of failing on your part. There are many people out there who understand and have compassion for what you are feeling.
Anonymous
November 7th, 2017 2:20am
"Hey (insert friend or family member's name), I'm quite depressed and I think I need help. I've been feeling this way for (however long)."
Ear4you
November 7th, 2017 9:59pm
It can be very difficult to explain to those around you when you are feeling depressed. I like to make sure my loved ones are aware of my early warning signs; which can include isolation, decrease in pleasurable activities, not answering phone calls, not answering text messages. Many times this is helpful because they might notice those signs well before I do and they can offer an ear to listen or offer a helping hand. Everyone experiences depression differently that is why learning your early warning signs and sharing them with those around you is so vital to you staying in a healthy state of mind.
Anonymous
February 13th, 2018 6:12pm
First figure out that are you really depressed by checking out the symptoms and if yes then figure out what is making you feel so down and out even though you don't always need a reason. After figuring out the reason you can talk to them when you both are completely free. If you are uncomfortable talking to them face to face you can write a letter and put it in a place which is within the I reach
courageousJoy86
April 3rd, 2018 8:45pm
Try explaining how you feel,rather than simply state a fact. Open up to them,try to make them understand.
softverity444
June 1st, 2021 4:53pm
you can be as blunt or as mysterious as you like, but telling people is the main part! many of us know about and have personally experienced symptoms of depression, and it is very rare a person will be judgemental about it. if they are one of those people, they're not a person for you. so, it can be an "hello, I have depression" or "hello, i really struggle to find the joy and energy in daily life". some will pick up on it if you're not comfortable saying it outright. but bluntness is helpful for that first step and weeding out those that aren't good for you!