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How do you deal with depression after a breakup?

309 Answers
Last Updated: 08/24/2020 at 12:07pm
How do you deal with depression after a breakup?
★ This question about Depression was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lisa Groesz, PhD

Psychologist

With evidenced based therapies, we find the root of the problem together to implement solutions. We all face crises, transitions, or disorders at some time.

Top Rated Answers
openedmind81
August 13th, 2015 6:00pm
Try to focus on me, and allow myself to learn from what happend without criticizing or being overly negative.
BreezyBeautiful87
December 27th, 2015 5:55am
Always remember your reasoning. Recognize that there were definitely positives to the relationship, but the negatives did not allow for a healthy experience. Grieving is natural, and healthy. Break-ups are a loss. Allow yourself to feel sad, and stay in the present moment to help yourself move forward.
letskeepsmiling
January 22nd, 2016 3:46pm
Ask how much the girl/ boy loves the other one and chat accordingly. It is their story which will give a solution and moreover the reason for breakup is important.
Mikeysidiotx
January 30th, 2016 3:56pm
im still trying to figure that out myself. its harder than i thought it would be but it has gotten easier. remember that you are the most important person in your life. dont let you past distract you in the present or future. stay positive lovelies.
ravimailin
February 5th, 2016 9:29am
i think that more better person and better life wil come ..always be ready for change , change always good for ourselves to improve us.
hopefulrabbit27
April 16th, 2018 8:49am
Just time and space. They are the things that help. Yea,friends and family play a role too but you need to help yourself by being caring to yourself and by giving time to yourself,to heal
LightAtTheEnd57
June 4th, 2015 6:41pm
i have not has a break up personally, but ii have helped others with theirs and see what has helped them. First you never want to be alone, because that's when you can feel upset or sad and do something bad. i recommend that you go out and explore new things, take time for yourself and spend time with things and people that make you happy. Support groups are very important!
AloneAcneLove
June 24th, 2015 8:53am
Find DISTRACTION and FOCUS. The best thing to do is to do something that will get your mind only THINKING about that "ONE THING". Not your ex, but a thing that you LOVED/LIKE other than your ex.
LoveHateAppreciate
July 2nd, 2015 4:30am
Remember the good times had with my ex. Recognize my emotions and accept them. Also I like to stay physically active and social to prevent from isolation.
Emmy20
July 2nd, 2015 7:08pm
Breakups are hard, but that's why we have friends and family. They may not always agree with our decisions, but they're always there when you need a shoulder to cry on. If not that, you'll always have 7 cups!
Sunflowerseverywhere
July 8th, 2015 7:32pm
Firstly, realize that the relationship is over, and work your way from there. If it was a devastating break- up, it might prove that ending it was the right thing to do. Secondly, after being loved by someone else, learn to love yourself even more. Focus on yourself for a bit, seek support in friends, and remember that there is someone much better out there waiting for you :)
Esmeralda1
August 5th, 2015 12:27am
Firstly, I think it as an experience. An experience which I will never forget about. An experience which will change all my thoughts, treats and future. The lessons I learned will always help me in my future relationships (either with friends or another one). What happens, happens and time will never stop for me. I will cry, be sad, but think it as a part of my life and continue. One door closes, another one opens.
Silverlingg
August 7th, 2015 1:13pm
After a breakup it's important to not isolate yourself. Rekindle friendships and hobbies that may have become neglected through your previous relationship. Being alone is the worst thing when suffering with depression after a breakup so the best thing to do is to reach out to other people, whether that be family members or friends and surround yourself in the happiness of others.
mysticalcod
August 14th, 2015 3:17pm
I think this is a tough one especially if you didn't want to break up. I think these things take a lot of time to heal. I also think spend as much of your free time with friends and family coz sitting home by yourself dwelling on the breakup isn't going to help
ConfideInMe07
December 20th, 2015 12:31am
Post breakup I would refrain from listening to songs that will make me miss my partner. I'll completely avoid them. Make a list of why they are jerks. Delete any data I have on them. Listen to songs that will make me feel confident and I'll absolutely not let them rent a place in my mind or heart and move on.
Anonymous
January 13th, 2016 2:59pm
I go out with my friends and try to do things I like, to enjoy my life and see always the positive side of everything.
Anonymous
February 5th, 2016 9:36pm
Coping with it will be hard but try to understand and me kind to yourself. Breakups are hard
SunnySara
March 1st, 2016 12:54am
You have to do whatever makes you happy or whatever makes you sad. It's honestly very different for each case
JTKMA
June 5th, 2016 6:53pm
I'm trying to speak to a lot of people, I go out with friends,.. I just do everything I can to think about something else like sport, draw, videogames or anything else. And if I want to stay at home cause I'm too depressed to go out, I speak with people on Skype. I also try to think about all the defaults of my ex and tell myself that I can have better and so it's not a big waste.
Anonymous
August 22nd, 2016 6:41pm
Everyone needs time to grieve after a breakup, death in the family, etc. BUT you have to remember that you are worth it! You have to mentally and physically pull yourself together and get back on track by focusing on yourself. The right person will come your way with time! Never let any situation get in your way, but let it be another lesson learned and you'll be able to help someone else who is facing the same situation that you are.
Anonymous
April 16th, 2015 8:44pm
Well i feel really sad sometimes... But we're too young to be sad :) Remember you'll be fine and thats a interim heartbrek :) try to feel better
ThePhoenixAlwaysRisesAgain
May 1st, 2015 2:16am
Tlc. Take time to discover new things. Take an art class or volunteer for a cause you are passionate about. Adopt or rescue a pet. Just some ideas. I found myself after a traumatic breakup, and it was empowering
MadilynRose
June 19th, 2015 5:10am
Dealing with a breakup is hard. A good thing to do is to talk to someone supportive about it, and make sure your feelings are heard!
Anonymous
June 19th, 2015 6:02pm
You accept it all, you get used to it until it hardly hurts anymore but if it causes things like clinical depression then you must go to the doctors for help
LivelyLavender
June 20th, 2015 11:03pm
Occupy your mind! Take part in an activity you genuinely enjoy doing. Also, if you have a pet, studies have shown that petting an animal releases endorphins, a chemical that makes you happy!
Brownieyes
June 21st, 2015 3:04am
Music. I know that it sounds stupid but it's how I deal with it. Music is the only thing that helps me through my depression besides god.
Anonymous
June 21st, 2015 11:48am
I stay depressed in my life and i slowly try to help others. I also listen to music and hopefully try to find something meaningful out of my life.
Zora17
June 21st, 2015 4:22pm
Allow yourself time to grieve over the lost relationship. Do not bottle your feelings, express them. Reach out for support around you and talk about it. Keeping a journal and writing out your feelings can help in coping and in figuring out yourself and the situation. Figure out ways to fulfill your life, such as by taking on new activities and responsibilities. Get involved and meet new people if you can, such as with a new job or volunteering. If the depression persists and you continue having difficulty, perhaps you have a lack of resources and support in the environment around you, reach out to a hotline or a professional like a counselor or therapist.
Anonymous
June 21st, 2015 8:38pm
Focus on yourself and find things that make you happy again. After a break up, it's important to remember that you can be happy without relying on someone else.
cellardoor1985
June 24th, 2015 1:25am
try as hard as you can every day not to act how you feel. you are going to have to be the most patient person in the room for an undetermined amount of time and it is awful.