Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How do you deal with depression after a breakup?

309 Answers
Last Updated: 08/24/2020 at 12:07pm
How do you deal with depression after a breakup?
★ This question about Depression was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lisa Groesz, PhD

Psychologist

With evidenced based therapies, we find the root of the problem together to implement solutions. We all face crises, transitions, or disorders at some time.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
June 24th, 2015 7:39am
Give yourself some time. Everyone is sad after a breakup. What you do when your depressed determines how strong you are. Remember that time eventually heals everything.
Anonymous
June 24th, 2015 2:31pm
Distance yourself from the person that you are breaking up with, try to keep busy and active and move one if you truly believe you have broken up.
InanimateWaterfall
June 24th, 2015 8:25pm
I recommend finding a type of relaxation. Avoid caffeine, stretch every chance you get, and think positively.
Anonymous
June 25th, 2015 1:53am
Try to rebuild your self image. Get close with your friends and focus on doing things that make you happy, and who you are now that this person is gone from your life. Acceptance, and moving on from it is the first few steps.
Anonymous
June 25th, 2015 5:30am
Let yourself grieve. Have a support system behind you and go out and do things you enjoy. If you need time to think about it schedual a time frame to think about the break up but when the time is up let it go for than and do something you enjoy.
Anonymous
June 25th, 2015 7:04am
This question hits hard. I have so many personal experiences with this but my most recent was seven months ago when my ex broke up with me and I admit depression hit me like a truck. It's hard and a natural process but you also need to remember that you can't stay in the funk and must always remember that you are important and that even if it didn't work out there are people who care and love you.
Anonymous
June 25th, 2015 5:55pm
Sometimes, it's a matter of time. You have to let your mind grieve and process through all of those tough emotions that come from breaking up. I find that it's helpful to try and distract yourself as much as possible. Get out of the house, make new memories so the ones between you and your ex are less potent.
writingloveaddy
June 25th, 2015 6:07pm
Focus on yourself and not what went wrong in a relationship. I know it will be hard as I've felt like this in a previous relationship. But you need to focus on you and only yourself and your health.
sunflowerKate
June 25th, 2015 9:35pm
Well, I find things I enjoy to focus on. For example, a long term goal for me is to become a published writer. So, after my last breakup I focused on my goal of becoming a writer, while coping with my breakup at the same time by writing extensive amounts of poetry.
AngleTYBarakatx
June 26th, 2015 3:43am
my best advice is to not talk to the person you have broken up with, talk to your friends and avoid contact with them at all possible
admirableFaith91
June 26th, 2015 8:42am
I indulge myself in works or just watch back-to-back movies and series. That helped for me. And one thing more. You should never go to any relationship just after the breakup as you will definitely be in the wrong place. Because, after a breakup, your mind is unstable and you can't decide the best for you. So, better to keep being single for a certain period before going into another relationship.
Thubten35
June 26th, 2015 1:32pm
Allow yourself to grieve... some people bounce back fast, some take a while. If you find yourself grieving beyond control, seek help. It could be your brain chemical imbalance, which can be treated.
niceMermaid44
June 26th, 2015 2:34pm
Understand the emotions that you are feeling are normal and embrace them.Hide everything that it is too difficult to see right now.Try to keep a regular schedule as best as you can. Try to get your mind off of it. Enjoy spending time with the people who are still in your life. Accept the end of the relationship.
chanelsdaisy
- Expert in Depression
June 26th, 2015 9:27pm
breakups are always hard. Hold on to people who loves you who you have fun with. But also spend your time alone think about everything and keep in your mind that it is okay that people are leaving sometimes.
Anonymous
June 27th, 2015 12:31pm
Friends are necessary in this situacions, and family too. People have to have emotional support at thoose times
theknight1
June 27th, 2015 3:44pm
يمكنني التغلب على كل المشاكل النفسية , بأستخدام التفكير المنطقي , وجعل الهدف في الحياة ليس العيش فقط , و إنما اكثر من ذلك ..
Anonymous
June 27th, 2015 9:49pm
Accept that it's going to happen and that sadness is natural. Be nice to yourself and don't beat yourself up for being less productive and less rational than usual. If you have people you can trust, take comfort in them. Try to strike a balance between holing up sobbing and getting out and doing things--some of each is good.
Thenextavailableagent
June 28th, 2015 12:06am
Finding inspiration in other things helps. Even if that doesn't involve a new relationship, sometimes finding passion in work, a hobby or even just your existing friends and family will help you heal.
Joseph394
June 28th, 2015 7:18am
Go hang out with friends or go out on a walk by yourself in the woods. Maybe bring a snack or some tea!
Anonymous - Expert in Depression
June 28th, 2015 7:33am
Allow yourself to be upset, then you let yourself have some fun. See the positives and ignore the negatives. Go out and get your mind off things
Anonymous
June 28th, 2015 8:20am
I haven't faced any breakups. I haven't ever tried to tie down any of my friends. "depression after breakup" is yet to be experienced.
ImHere01
June 28th, 2015 7:59pm
I think that depression after the break is normal because you loved that person is assumed. But if the love is over, not worth suffering :(
Anonymous
June 28th, 2015 10:29pm
I think that the self help guide on this site is wonderful for teaching self care after a break up.
allnaturalHeart67
July 1st, 2015 3:03am
The person that you thought loved you doesn't care about you at all. You feel like you're dying inside.
Anonymous
July 1st, 2015 6:48am
Give yourself time to grieve and understand it is natural to not feel OK, don't beat yourself up, thus meaning: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding. I personally find it helpful to talk to others abut their experiences with past breakups and how they are doing now, to find out others also felt bad, and are better at the present, or even found nicer things they couldn't have found if they stayed in that relationship, it gives me hope. After the strong emotions have passed, give yourself time to get over it, to re-connect with yourself, learn from past mistakes, learn what good it left you, give thanks, find new hobbies, etc. Do not jump from one relationship to another to feel better, people who have learnt to be alone tend to have better relationships in the future because they won't settle for anything just to scape "bad feelings". So learn to be by yourself, is a hard thing to do, but enormously rewarding.
GermanZebraCupcake
July 1st, 2015 11:40am
Let yourself grieve! I know it is sooooo tough right now, honestly, but just let yourself cycle through the wheel of emotions that come after a breakup. You're grieving the end of a relationship and all you can do is keep trying to move on. :)
BeyondThePines
July 1st, 2015 10:10pm
Dealing with depression after a breakup can be very hard at first, but the good news is that with time it becomes really easy. Right now, it may be the focus of your mind throughout the day. In time it will definitely be something you think less and less of. Right after a break up, I would talk about it... a lot. Don't let thoughts sit inside your head. After talking, do something you like to do, or something that makes you happy, or really anything that gets your mind off it. You'll be okay, it'll just take time.
BLMlove15
July 1st, 2015 10:42pm
Take care of yourself. Really! You'll be feeling pretty vulnerable, so take care of yourself. Comfort yourself, and do whatever you need to do to feel better. (in a healthy and positive way of course)
TalkToMe21
July 2nd, 2015 7:10pm
When I had first left my last relationships it felt as though I no longer had a purpose. I simply didn't want to move from my bed. The first day, I didn't. The next day I got up, showered, did laundry, and lounged in a clean bed with clean pajamas and hot cocoa. For the rest of the long weekend, I practiced self care and made my physical self better, like nails and hair, while waiting for my mind and emotions to take a hint.
Wonderest
July 2nd, 2015 7:15pm
In my experience, I try to take care of myself. This is a time in which I focus on me only. After a breakup, one might feel lost and hopeless, because a person who meant so much in our lives is no longer in it. But this is an opportunity to take from the experience and study the parts from this relationship that made me grow as a person. I also talk to close friends and write down my feelings. When everything is bottled up inside and holding us down, one cannot move forward.