Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How to forgive yourself for cheating or lying?

308 Answers
Last Updated: 05/23/2022 at 6:47am
How to forgive yourself for cheating or lying?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lisa Groesz, PhD

Psychologist

With evidenced based therapies, we find the root of the problem together to implement solutions. We all face crises, transitions, or disorders at some time.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
May 27th, 2018 6:48pm
The best way to forgive yourself is to understand yourself. You're a human being. Human beings make mistakes, they may lie or cheat. They may hurt people or hurt themselves. So understand yourself, you're a human being, and it's okay to make mistakes and lie. Just make sure to not repeat it, and learn from it.
niceSun56
June 6th, 2018 2:09pm
By not allowing yourself to do so again. Actions speak louder than words. Commit to being a better person and follow through with the commitment.
gentleBubbles83
June 8th, 2018 1:41am
First offer an apology to the person that may have been hurt by it. The best way is to learn from the experience.
LiseningSunkistSloth
June 15th, 2018 1:57am
I first forgive myself by doing the right thing. Which is going to the person and admitting what I have done. Then ask for forgiveness, and if they don't take it just think you did the right thing and that's all you can do. Don't beat yourself up.
Anonymous
June 16th, 2018 7:00am
The most important thing to remember is that forgiving yourself is a process. Learn from your mistakes and maybe write down what you can do differently next time
politeTree46
June 20th, 2018 1:01pm
It’s difficult and takes time. I find that forgiveing yourself is made easier when you recognise you’ve done wrong, but learn as much as you can from it. You can’t change what’s been done and said, the only thing you can do is learn. It’s a lot easier to forgive yourself if you take the situation for what it is and feel you’ve made a positive change from learning about the situation. We all make mistakes. And they can be difficult mistakes to deal with - but what’s important is taking responsibility for those mistakes and learning from them to move forward.
myfriendat1
June 21st, 2018 12:20pm
Write all emotions like cheating,lying etc in a piece of paper and also write why you cheated or lyed and write how you will not repeat it.once it done tear the paper and throw in to the dustbin.you will feel better
Rellen2013
June 24th, 2018 4:38pm
I would talk about it with someone and try to find why I felt like at the time I needed to cheat or lie. Then if it doesn't hurt the other person or could put myself in harm, I would tell that person what happened and that I am regretful it happened. I would allow them to say what they need to say and not judge their feelings. If it is possible for the relationship to continue, I would move forward. If not, then I would try to learn from it and do my best not to make the same mistake again
Anonymous
June 25th, 2018 5:47pm
"You cannot change the past" and that's the only thing you can think and try to move on. You were given this life to live not to regret.
Anonymous
June 29th, 2018 10:02pm
Only you yourself can help you in this one. cheating or lying is definitely something that everyone does multiple times in their life, you yourself have to take time and eventually forgive yourself.
energizingBlanket44
June 29th, 2018 11:55pm
The deed was done. Something you have to let go👍 The longer it linger on’s to you, the harder it will become. Extract the feeling from deep inside your heart and throw further than you could ever imagine😜
LucieG
July 1st, 2018 10:16pm
We all make mistakes, its how we grow and learn at any age, be kind to yourself, being truthful about what has happened is always the best option
Anonymous
July 4th, 2018 3:16am
We are all learning, we are all trying to experience this life and do the best we can. You are worth it and you are not the sum of your mistakes you are a wonderful and complex creature trying to navigate an already difficult life.
optimisticBlossom17
July 4th, 2018 4:39pm
First you should acknowledge the fact that you cheated or lied.Then,apologize to the person you lied to or cheated on.Finally,keep repeating to yourself in your head that you forgive yourself and that you will avoid cheating/lying again.
crushinIn003seconds
July 6th, 2018 6:34pm
Acknowledge the mistakes first, learn from it and then next time will be different. Do not beat yourself down for it, we're all human and we all make mistakes. Acknowledging your mistakes is better than denying they ever happened.
Anonymous
July 8th, 2018 12:40pm
By coming to terms with the fact that you did it because once one comes to terms with it they can begin the road to forgiveness.
Anonymous
July 15th, 2018 7:38pm
I do anything else nicely or helping people or animal, cleaning the house, talk to people nicely, smile to people. Yeah doing something good. Or I just tell my self why I did that (cheating or lying), tell my self I was wrong, feel regret, and at the same time I have to apologize to my self. There is one part of my heart that always said ‘forgive me. Forgive me’ when I did something wrong. And then I’ll said, ‘I forgive you’. I know it sounds ridiculous but that what’s actually happen.
Summerwish
July 19th, 2018 4:40am
You can write what you did down or tell the person that your lying to or cheating on about it and see what happens
Anonymous
July 26th, 2018 6:11am
It can be tough dealing with the underlying sense of guilt that comes from cheating or lying, even sometimes with inconsequential things. Make an agreement to yourself that because you know it doesn't make you feel good, you'll avoid doing it in the future, because there is no way to change what you did in the past.
wearywickedheart
August 1st, 2018 8:56am
Acknowledge you did it, if you feel badly for it then you're already halfway there. Figure out why you did it and resolve whatever that cause was. Then, most importantly, remember that what you do is not who you are. You alone choose your actions and behavior. Stop letting the thoughts live your life. I hope you find peace
Anonymous
August 2nd, 2018 4:51pm
Forgiving yourself is an important step. Think about it as another life experience, as long as you learn from it, you're just growing as a person. Learn to forgive yourself by helping others and along the way you will learn that you can choose to be a good person or not.
Anonymous
August 10th, 2018 1:20pm
Just tell your self that it already happend and promise yourself you’d never do it again , then apologize to the person you laid or cheated on
Nichole121002
August 11th, 2018 8:16pm
You have to realize that no one is perfect....people make mistakes including you and myself. While cheating or lying isn't right, it's not something to beat yourself up about. Don't dwell on the past, apologize to who you need to and move on❤you're not the first person that has ever lied or cheated lol❤
Anonymous
August 17th, 2018 3:33am
You need to remember that we are all humans and humans have flaws. It is not something that we see as a myth, it is actually a reality. Although we aim for perfection, some period of time may let our state of mind wonder unconsciously. Therefore, it is possible for us to put blame on ourselves due to our mistakes. To that, would you think that it is worth it to keep on thinking about the past or would it be more valuable if you are aware of the mistakes that you have done but learning from them and try to look towards the present and future rather than dwell in the past?
J04scoliosis
August 29th, 2018 11:02am
Tell yourself it was all in the past, everyone deserves a second chance and if your willing to grow as a person then that there is a sign of a great person and if you have anyone you have lied to or cheated on I think you should say sorry to really leave that part of you in the past, I have been in your shoes and I have learnt people change and I have learnt to forgive myself by apologising to the people I have hurt and then I told myself, everyone deserves a second chance and I haven't told lies since I forgave myself and moved on
snowflakes
September 8th, 2018 2:34pm
When we commit a mistake, the first thing we need is realization of our mistake. Once we realize we have done something wrong and what that mistake is, next thing is to correct it. Make a conscious decision to never lie and cheat again. To always be truthful. Now go and confess your mistake to whoever you have cheated, lied to. Apologize and ask them for forgiveness. If they do fine. If they don't,accept their decision and respect it. If they have incurred some loss due to you lying, try to fix it if you can. But not if it brings any more harm to that person. Or if they disagree. Now you forgive yourself and move on. But not without a lesson learnt
MagicalLemon
September 19th, 2018 7:56pm
Start by working through what lead you to do that in the first place. Once you can understand your process you can begin to learn from. I found it important to set myself positive goals for the future and new standards of what was acceptable. There is healing in preparing for your future behaviour. For this to work, I need to confront the impact I had on the other person too. That combined with the impact on myself was enough to know I didn't want to repeat what I had done as it was too late to change it. Lead with an honest heart in future and you'll start to build yourself in your own head again.
Infinitelove0107
September 30th, 2018 4:53am
Humans are known for making rash decisions and mistakes, and this can be seen through many instances throughout the course of human history. Be it from grasping to a sense of security at a moment of vulnerability or being seduced by an ulterior motive. What we can do as human beings is only give back as much as we've taken from trust and honesty. Whatever mistake we make, we take a proactive step in reflecting upon our mistakes and proving to society that we are no longer our past self. Lying and Cheating is no different, so first one must evaluate what constitutes as "giving back". A common first step is admitting your mistake without any cutbacks; no excuses. Afterwards, assess the proper compensation for it, in the meanwhile bettering your ideals and principles in order to avoid making this mistake in the future. Once this is done, you have logically given the world your best, and regardless of whether they are open to forgiving you, you will forgive yourself. QUOTEDDD
NeverLetGoXXVIII
October 11th, 2018 3:21am
People aren't perfect, and that's okay. Some people will forgive you, which is wonderful, and some people won't, which is unfortunate. However, you can be the biggest person though by learning from it, forgiving yourself, and moving on. Always easier said than done though! Personal growth and self-validation matter more than what others think. People make mistakes, but no one gets anywhere by being judgemental. Keep moving forward and growing, and things will get better. The guilt will ease up over time. You might need to let go of people or things or places that make it harder for your to move on and grow. Not forgiving yourself only holds yourself back.
Anonymous
November 1st, 2018 9:47am
We all do things that we aren’t very proud of. It’s part of human nature to be flawed and not perfect all of the time. It can be really hard later to deal with the guilt of what happened. I would recommend doing your best to make peace with yourself. Try to understand your motivations and think of what you could do in the future instead. Try to evaluate your values to see if that is the behaviour that you want. It doesn’t mean that you’re a bad person. Just that you made a bad choice. We all do, and it’s never to late to change our behaviour. Acceptance, reflection, and moving forward with new ideas and goals.