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How to forgive yourself for hurting someone?

303 Answers
Last Updated: 11/17/2020 at 7:33pm
How to forgive yourself for hurting someone?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jessica McDaniel, LPC, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I have been practicing cognitive behavioral psychotherapy since 2007 with a diverse group of adult clients with various diagnoses, all races, and socioeconomic classes.

Top Rated Answers
sugaryKermit7347
March 31st, 2020 10:38pm
The first and only real step is forgiving yourself, if you can't forgive yourself you will ever be able to move on - once you get through that you will be able to fully forgive the situation but rember you have to work on you first becuase if you let yourself go you could fall into depressio and then that would be really bad so remeber forgive youself ad then forgive your situation and then hopefully prayerfully youll be able to full acess the situation, If you need ayone to talk to I'm here just message me < Have a good day!
wonderousPenguin
September 30th, 2020 10:04am
Holding on to the past mistakes and giving ourselves a hard time about what we cannot change can have quite the negative impact on our mental health. Sometimes our worst critic is our own inner critic. Keeping these grudges about ourselves can lead to self hatred, and can in the long term the stress of guilt can impact our bodies, such as giving us insomnia, loss of appetite and an increase in blood pressure. This can be a terrible thing to feel! The relationship we have with ourselves can be vital to our mental health, and the first step toward that is having self-forgiveness. Although it may be hard to, treating yourself with self-love and the respect you deserve as a human being might be one way to overcome these guilty feelings. The last time your friend was doubting themselves, what kinds of things did you say to them to reassure them? Try telling that to yourself, and become your own best friend, as this can help you to overcome these feelings. Remind yourself as well of all the good things you have done and are capable of, as these define us more so than our past mistakes. Hopefully by allowing yourself to let go of these feelings and allowing yourself to accept your past might help build a more loving and caring relationship with yourself, which in turn might help those feelings of guilt subside.
Rebekah
November 17th, 2020 7:33pm
Sometimes, we may find it incredibly difficult to forgive ourselves. This is totally normal, and completely valid. Self-forgiveness is something that is very hard to develop and maintain, we aren't all able to forgive ourselves in a day - it doesn't come naturally all the time, though we all have the ability, power and strength to forgive ourselves, and it could start today. It's amazing to see that you're feeling remorseful or guilty; while these feelings are horrendous and they make us feel incredibly negative, they are good feelings. They show that we are repenting our past errors, and bad decisions - and that we're human. Everyone makes mistakes, we all hurt someone at some point during our lives; it's completely normal and almost impossible to avoid. We may hurt our partner(s), children, family members - we're not perfect. Everyone has their faults, everyone does damage, and everyone gets angry. We often act out in the heat of the moment. Try not to let your anger control you. Some people believe that pain teaches us life lessons, and according to some beliefs or different perceptions, "sins" overall are hard to bypass. Try to lead with your heart, not with your head - empathy is a superpower! Use that, perhaps in a form of letter. One way to forgive ourselves may be to apologise to the person(s) we have wronged. I completely understand how difficult it is to face someone directly and say, "I'm sorry" - it may be a good idea to write the person(s) a letter, expressing how you feel about the action you committed. Write your true feelings. You may not get the result you hope for, as it is a personal choice to forgive another, but it would show a great deal of care and empathy to apologise to the person(s). The world is a beautiful place, full of perfectly imperfect people.