I don't want to get better? Why do I feel this way? Is it bad

Only you know the answer but I can understand why you feel that way. I think the idea of getting better, of becoming "normal" is very scary. Because we get used to being depressed/anxious/emotionally unstable in general etc. It kind of becomes part of our identity, we forget who we are without it. Getting better feels like abandoning a part of yourself : Who am I without it? Will I be enough? Will i ever be able to function as well as other people? How will i do to catch up? It's scary. And the whole process of getting better is tiring. Because there are ups and downs, that sometimes you relapse, that you have to reach out to others and open up and think about things you would rather forget. It's hard. It's scary. I understand. But if you do try your best, and never give up you'll get better someday. It might not be perfect, but you'll be more at peace. That's the whole point in my opinion : giving yourself the margin to reveal your whole potential and become who you are. Because you do have potential. You have the ability to dream even if it's hard now. You have worth. And that will never change.

Its not necessarily bad. It might be that you're scared to get better or to put the work in. Or maybe you think that it won't be worth it. It's completely normal. When you are depressed for a long period of time, you get comfortable and it might feel easier to just stay sad because getting better seems too difficult. That is normal, however if you're able to talk to someone about it like someone you trust or a therapist that could be really helpful. They could help you get yourself out of a rut and make you realize the benefits to getting better.

It is not bad. It is normal to feel helpless and dejected sometimes. It is okay to feel what you feel. It is also important to identify what you exactly feel. This helps us understand ourselves better and move towards solving the problem. IT will also help us feel lighter and better. We can find out together as to why you feel this way. You are not alone in this journey to feel better. What do you think is making you feel this way? You can tell me anything that comes to your mind right now. I am all ears.

It isn't bad to feel you don't want to get better because if you don't want to improve it means you may not feel comfortable trying and seeking the guidance to break through your problems at this time.