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I feel out of place everywhere I go. It feels like being homesick but I feel it even when I'm at home. I'm starting to feel like maybe life isn't meant for everyone. How can I make this go away?

3 Answers
Last Updated: 12/07/2020 at 6:24am
1 Tip to Feel Better
Italy
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Anna Pavia, psicologa psicoterapeuta psychotherapist psychologist counselor

Licensed Professional Counselor

I feel my work as my personal mission and I love it. My work with clients is nonjudgmental, supportive. I am a very good listener. I use several approaches. Amo il mio lavoro.

Top Rated Answers
Charlie40
July 16th, 2018 10:43pm
What you describe was very familiar to me for years, and I still feel it sometimes, although more rarely now, because I grew more comfortable with it,  somehow. So I can honestly tell you that this homesickness is not about life not being for everyone, like you were wondering. You are probably more acutely alive through this, only it is all a bit more constellated with question marks that seem to be here for no reason. Two things happened that made it easier for me: realising there was nothing wrong with me, but simply, a couple of pieces of the puzzle were missing, and it was not like having no home, but rather like not having a "homing device". Eventually I accepted to be home-free, floating, going through life without the usual anchors. At one point I thought, do I need the anchoring? It would be nice, yes, but so much discovery and wisdom  can be done without, so, I'll just get going, and if I meet home one day, I'll know. I havent yet met home, but I am ok, it is ok. Maybe home for us is the earth, and we are kind of accidental pioneers who are discovering slowly we not need to be more specific about home. The second thing was becoming aware (through a late revelation by a relative) of a very early trauma, one that can happen before memory comes with words : so the feeling of not being home may be a texture, a intuition, of a way you adapted, very early, as a human, to a shock or a hardship, and it may simply  your body remembering in a very "unspoken" way that something didn't quite go as it should but you survived and adapted, and it stays on as a sort of echo of that kind of heroic thing you may have done very young, to make the world ok. In any case, it is you, you can embrace it, and you are not alone. It is a strange feeling, but for me it means you are very much alive, and you can do great things,  as a...traveller, in this life. We are all travellers in a way. Some feel it more than others.
interestingHeart37
February 11th, 2019 9:35am
You feel out of place everywhere and even at home you said well home is what you make it, it's not a direct place its where you feel most comfortable and maybe you just haven't found that place yet but its out there for you its out there for anyone who needs it so you are not alone there are people that felt the same way i felt that way before i found seven cups this place been like a home to me it treated me right and that's what you need to look for a place that treats you right
YourNeighbourhoodsuperhero
December 7th, 2020 6:24am
I would suggest starting with the little things. What I mean by that is perhaps doing activities such as caring for yourself, hygiene and washing your face, brushing your teeth. Discovering for yourself a new product you may like doing those activities can slowly introduce a snowball effect ( but more on that later . ) As for the beginning that may be all that is needed, depending on where you are. Changing our environment has a major effect on us, the things we use daily often become nothing more than part of our habitual rituals. As for the snowball effect, after having done that - or if you are at mid point with where you are with things. It sometimes helps us to aim for larger than life goals and beginning with mid-style managerial so to speak. In that of being at the helm of the forest - leader you, and then there is the managerial you which is down in the forest looking around for the next tree to get through so to speak. Now with a lot of care for trees, this is just an analogy as to doing a task, being in charge of it and managing it. The last tid bit of the puzzle piece is the worker or the technician within you, we all have those and they usually fret over the little things. Without this part of us we cannot really get anything done, so right then and there you can focus on - and start tending to those little things, again - by having a minor small win ( Which is not so minor in the person who experiences this ) you are able to move forward a lot faster and perhaps accomplish more than a lot of people are able to accomplish in 2 weeks than most do in months or decades. It is an over statement, but in a sense it is not, as if you are able to decide and with having your focus so honed in on what you want with the 3 perspectives I mentioned ( Which become actions and then habits ) you truly are able to do this, it becomes an accomplishment rather than a speculation. I hope this has helped you in picking up on things and of taking on this feeling on board, listening to it, heading its call and channeling it in your direction, with it having being your friend, your new won over friend on the other side!