People don't believe I'm really depressed, how can I explain it to them?

30 Answers
Last Updated: 08/28/2018 at 10:45am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lauren Abasheva, LMHC

Licensed Professional Counselor

A sex positive, and kink knowledgeable therapist with an open mindset and a clear understanding that we are all different.

Top Rated Answers
awesomeMoment27
January 19th, 2016 9:07pm
I see you are concerned because people don't take your depression seriously. Am I hearing you correctly?
MattsListening
November 7th, 2014 6:00am
I've had it explained to me like this. Depression is like a boulder chained to your ankle. You can't just unhook the chain and walk away whenever you feel like it. Sometimes the boulder is a little lighter, and you can function almost normally, sometimes it's heavier and it weighs you down, but it is always there. However with help, time, and effort you can learn how to carry that boulder a little easier.
Anonymous
November 10th, 2014 5:27am
I've learned that you should never have to explain those types of things to people. You know you are depressed, if they don't believe you then it's their problem. They can't fathom what you are going through, because they are not in your shoes and that is okay. Not everyone can understand.
Anonymous
November 15th, 2014 12:17am
Even people that seem happy, can get sad too. Don't judge a book by it's cover. Depression can effect anyone. Sometimes not all at once, but in small bursts every now and then. You always believed my fake smile. I keep it to myself, and have been suffering alone.
Anonymous
October 29th, 2014 11:57am
This might be really unhelpful, but some people just don't believe depression can happen. To those ones, you can't explain anything. Others believe people who have decent lives (enough to eat, place to sleep, education, etc.) can't get depressed. To those ones, you can try to explain depression. Some of them might understand. Others might not.
MountainHills
May 24th, 2015 9:04pm
People who haven't felt depression will not know what it is, or how it feels. If you are explaining how you feel and they are still not believing you, they probably wont ever.
chillstep
October 5th, 2014 12:33am
That is a difficult situation, and I am sorry you are going through it. Often times, people do not understand depression. Of course this does not mean you aren't experiencing it. What would an ideal conversation sound like between you and your friend who doesn't understand?
sblee
November 7th, 2014 3:30pm
These people need to know that depression isn't merely an "emotion" your experiencing, but it is a medical psychological disorder (Under the DSM- official classification for these "illness), that affects you in all aspects of life, psychologically, socially and biologically.
Snoww
September 11th, 2014 4:08am
I don't know your exact symptoms, but depression is a real disease that has shown to have genetic and environmental factors. See if your family has a history of any sort of mental illness. I know that when my mom made a family chart it seemed like 50% of the people had been diagnosed with some type of mood disorder. Also, check the diagnosis criteria for Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) and depression. This shouldn't be used to diagnose yourself, but if it turns out several symptoms are present, you may want to see a psychiatrist. Also, statistics are extremely hard to argue with. About 20% of minors have had an episode of MDD, and depression affects about the same rate in the general population. Lastly, if you're in a school of some sort, counselors are fantastic references. They can get you connected with psychiatrist and can explain depression to whom ever it is that doesn't believe you. That's actually how I got the help I needed. My school counselor talked to my parents, we agreed to admit myself into an inpatient unit, and then I saw a psychiatrist who started me on an antidepressant. Today, I'm doing better. My meds have changed so that the doses are higher and I'm taking more than one. I hope this gives you an idea of how to get the help you need!
sccmarshall
October 12th, 2014 3:50pm
Be honest and open about your feelings. Do not try to make things sound better or worse in order to make people listen or understand.
Sara889
October 22nd, 2014 9:06pm
Depression can be a really hard concept for some people to understand. If someone hasn't experienced extreme sadness or depression before, they may have a harder time understanding those feelings. When trying to explain your feelings to someone, you need to try to explain your feelings very clearly. This may be hard, since depression is a complicated issue. You can also use medical journals and books to find way to make yourself understood more easily.
Anonymous
October 29th, 2014 11:23pm
tell them to research it or watch a video on it because anxiety can be quite traumatising so it makes you sad when people dont understand
Anonymous
August 18th, 2015 6:40am
It's their problem that they don't believe you. You don't have to explain anything to them. If they believe you, they believe you. If they don't, they don't. Don't worry about it. And if it's something important where they really need to know if you are clinically depressed or not, try and get a doctor's note or something.
Anonymous
November 19th, 2015 1:10am
Explaining to someone that you really are depressed is a really hard thing to do. You just want them to understand you and know how you feel. But honestly you don't have to prove anything to them. But if you really want them to know what is going on in your life try and talk as if it's a metaphor I know when I first told my parents I had depression and they didn't understand I said "It feels like your drowning and your being pulled down further and further and everyone can swim and stare at you." It made them quiet but they understood.
Lindsay0130
October 6th, 2014 10:43pm
Last year I was very depressed. I had a really hard problem telling people because no one would believe me, than one day I made a teary confession and people started to believe me
Anonymous
November 16th, 2014 4:55pm
It doesn't matter whether or not people believe you are depressed. I think a good way to help others and yourself would be to find some great resources online where the people in your life can read up about depression and the affects it has on you and others around you. Also just basic knowledge of the illness would be good for others around you to know.
Anonymous
November 18th, 2014 3:53pm
You can explain it to them by being honest with everything you're feeling and going through with some examples so it'll be easier for them to have a concrete understanding of it.
Anonymous
November 20th, 2014 8:19am
Let them Things anyhing you dont need anyone to belive anything its Your life so be it....---------------
Anonymous
April 3rd, 2018 11:40am
People don't understand that and yes when it comes to mental health, people are less accepting, don't take it out on them because they will disappoint you and to be true everyone doesn't really understand how one feels when he/she is depressed and only thing it will create is resentment for them, for not understanding what you are going through and it will make you feel worse. If you really want to talk then I think you should go to a professional or take a challenge to get yourself out of it, it's difficult and for the most part you are alone in this, so fight for yourself and bring yourself out of it or at least try and if you have any problem then there people you can talk to, we are happy to listen what you want to say.
letsbehopeful
August 28th, 2018 10:45am
Firstly, other people don't decide how you feel. If you're depressed, you're depressed. If you still want to explain it to them, maybe try to refer to a website or book that explains it better than what you feel you can do right there and then. From my experience, all people can't believe everything you tell them, because they haven't experienced it by themselves. And remember, if they can't seem to understand, or don't want to - just listen to yourself and do what's best for you. Telling people is not always the best solution. My experience is also that I just tell people that really need to know, all people don't have to know about your struggles.
AuroraBorealis
October 27th, 2014 5:36am
First of all, you are not required to explain yourself to anyone. You don't need their validation, because if you are depressed then it is YOU, not them, that is trying to get help and answers. If you really must prove your depression, then sit them down and try to describe what is it like, and how your mind is working right now. Refer to a psychologist/therapist, and try your best to stay objective.
ItsMaria
November 1st, 2014 5:57pm
You shouldn't have to convince people you are depressed. No one will understand and when one is depressed, making people understand shouldn't be a priority. Depression is a personal matter.
Anonymous
November 12th, 2014 5:48am
Explain that depression is a very severe issue and that classical symptoms of depression do not apply to everyone.
Anonymous
August 4th, 2015 1:36am
If someone doesn't believe your depressed, you should tell them what you are going through. There is no guarantee that they will believe you, but you know what you're feeling is real that that is what matters.
Maritza
November 17th, 2015 2:40pm
Sometimes it may be hard for others to "see" you as being depressed sometimes it is nice to be able to find a person with whom you can be accountable to where they say "I am with you in this, and I will not leave you." Talking about your depression will help people to understand what your going through as well. Explain that you feel worthless, guilty, are unable to sleep, don't want to get out of bed and can't think clearly. Also explain that people who are not depressed don't feel these things every day.
OliviaTheSoothingComforter
March 6th, 2017 5:42pm
You can explain your depressed in different ways, but if they refuse to believe you maybe they are not the friends you want to have, your friends need to be supportive and believe you when you tell them something that serious.
Danielle999
October 9th, 2017 1:01pm
Explaining to someone that you really are depressed is a really hard thing to do. You just want them to understand you and know how you feel. But honestly you don't have to prove anything to them. But if you really want them to know what is going on in your life try and talk as if it's a metaphor I know when I first told my parents I had depression and they didn't understand I said "It feels like your drowning and your being pulled down further and further and everyone can swim and stare at you." It made them quiet but they understood.
Anonymous
November 17th, 2017 1:15am
Being depressed is just like suffocating But you can see everyone around you breathing You should be able to take in fresh air like everybody else, but you can’t. The worst part is everyone mistakes your chest moving frantically up and down as breathing
Anonymous
January 16th, 2018 11:18am
Depression is a serious issue and should be taken serious. Let the person know that you have depression and everyone has their own experience of it. If you have to prove your depression you should consider finding new people to associate with that understand you
nataliejuliet
April 24th, 2018 2:39pm
Explain that you understand why they may not believe you, but the feelings you are experiencing are very real. Explain how these feelings of depression are impacting your life and relationships and the way you function. Ask them to consider your point of view and put themselves into your shoes.