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What should I do if I am feeling suicidal, but don't want to tell anyone?

304 Answers
Last Updated: 07/10/2020 at 10:40pm
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Jennifer Patterson, LMFT

Art Therapist

Life can be messy. Sometimes you need a little support to make your way through it. I love to help guide people through their challenges & to find the beauty in our messes.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
May 31st, 2019 2:09pm
Write your feelings down. Cry if you want to, really helps. Think about what is making you feel this way. Is it worth it? It will be a new day tomorrow. This too will pass. I have been there it may seem like nothing will change no matter how much you think about it but it will. Go out, pick up a book, start reading or drawing or painting or whatever it is that you enjoy doing. It may seem mundane but sometimes we just need to do these mundane things to feel. Go outisde, feel the sun, feel the wind on your skin, look at the clouds and feel.
xMidnightDemon
June 9th, 2019 1:24am
I totally understand how it is to feel that way. To be suicidal and scared to tell someone. I was scared to tell anyone I knew in real, so I decided to talk to someone I met online. I tried a lot of apps and sites. It’s never good to keep it for yourself. The best way to help yourself, is talking about it. If you don’t want to tell anyone you know in real, talk to a random person. I downloaded a game where I could talk to someone. So whenever I felt depressed, sad or suicidal, I went on it and played and talked to people. So I could distract myself. I also knew people I met online months ago or even years ago. So I trusted them. I talked to them about my problems and they have been an incredible help. They were there for me and even tried to look for solutions. It helped me a lot when I talked about it, because I didn’t have to bottle up everything anymore. My advice is, talk about it. For real, just talk about it. Sometimes it feels good to talk about it with a total stranger. They don’t know you and can help you. You don’t need to feel ashamed. If you don’t want to talk about it with anyone at all, write it down. Keep a journal, write about it. Write about how you are feeling, what is causing it, etc. It helps, because you will feel relieved.
ConscientiousHarry
June 15th, 2019 2:59pm
If you don't want to tell anyone, at least try to think about anyone who you would affect if you were to suddenly disappear. Even those who don't think they are loved by anyone still have the capacity to be loved by someone. Talking to strangers is easier than talking to people you know or people face-to-face because there is no prejudice when you start to tell them why you are feeling the way you are. Keeping everything to ourselves is unhealthy, and even if we find it difficult, try and find ways to communicate with others - anyone - with how you are feeling. Don't give up hope, the world may be a dark place, but there's always a light shining at the end of the metaphorical tunnel.
Anonymous
July 3rd, 2019 9:44am
Telling someone what is going on inside your head is one of the crucial factors to healing. If you isolate yourself and don't talk to people, your condition won't get better. Sometimes pouring your heart out is a step to feeling better. No it won't stop you from feeling the way you feel but that cry for help might make the person aware of your condition and well being. Let others help you. You wont make much difference if you isolate yourself, you will just make it worse. There is nothing bad in telling people how you feel .
yancore
July 10th, 2019 6:12am
If you're feeling suicidal WITH A PLAN, it's strongly recommended that you contact The National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. If you aren't great with calls, there's the Crisis Text line at 741-741. Don't wait to receive help. You matter. However, if you're experiencing suicidal thoughts, that's a different thing. once again, it's recommended you tell someone. It could turn into where you truly consider it. A parent, pastor, teacher, anyone. it's important. once you receive therapy, your therapist can take things from there. Once again, again, if you feel suicidal with a plan, don't hesitate to get help. listeners can only do so much. I hope you get the help you need
Sydneyohl
July 14th, 2019 5:47am
If you are ever feeling suicidal, you should seek help right away. Suicide is a serious thing. Mental health is not talked about enough these days and it should be changed. You may feel that reaching out makes you seem weak, but trust me it only makes you stronger. Reaching out to an adult or therapist can be really helpful even if you are scared to do so. Yet doing so can completely change your perspective on life for the better. Please reach out to someone for help. I believe in you! I want you to get better :) !
Parn442
July 19th, 2019 8:26pm
The first and the most important thing to do is to stay around people. NEVER BE ALONE IN SUCH A SITUATION. In fact, I'd suggest that you take some medicines to help you sleep so that you can fall asleep quickly at night and aren't left alone with your thoughts at night. Stay around people and have a general talk with them so as to divert yourself from the thoughts even if a bit. Also, sometimes it might be the case where you aren't comfortable with talking to someone you know about those thoughts. So you can talk to someone you don't know. A stranger who would actually care and help. There are many suicide helplines. You could talk to them and they will really help you. Do what you need to in order to keep yourself going. Because no matter what, those thoughts are not permanent and believe me when I say that for reasons related to experience. So just keep going for a while and leave it all up to time. Time heals everything. Even your mind. Do things that you love to do or that you 'loved' to do before and find new interests. Also, music does help. It really does help. But remember to not go with the flow of the music and then alienate yourself again. Pick your genres very cautiously if you're easily affected by art, be it any form of art.. music, acts, drawings.. whatever. Don't let it get to you no matter how much you may feel like you relate to it. Also, try to find new interests and new distractions. Reading helps too, but as I said, pick your genres carefully. Find humourous stuff and try to bring your apparently lost sense of humour appreciation back. Do everything it takes to survive because remember, you're facing this because you're a fighter. Not everyone can do this as bravely as you are and trust me when I say that you're brave because you are here, seeking for answers to this question. You, sir/ma'am, are certainly too courageous and life will welcome you once you have been in and out through it, having gained a priceless experience.
BraveWings116
July 31st, 2019 5:20pm
Although it can feel terrifying to reach out to someone about your suicidal feelings, I urge you to talk to someone. It doesn't have to be your parents if you're not comfortable with that, but could be an older sibling, a trusted teacher, a family friend, the important thing being that they are a trusted adult who you feel comfortable with. Alternatively, you can always call a suicide hotline. The reason that I really hope you do reach out to someone is because feeling suicidal is a heavy burden to bear by oneself and it only gets heavier with time. Often, even just telling someone about it can lessen that weight considerably. Telling someone will not make the feelings go away, but it will make you feel less alone and isolated. And hopefully the adult that you tell will be able to help you. A word of advice, though, if the first adult you tell does not react in the way you want and does not help you, then reach out to another trusted adult. Do not take their negative reaction personally, since suicide is a heavy topic and the individual may just not be psychologically equipped to help you. Please keep reaching out until you find the help you need.
lifefragments
August 1st, 2019 12:26pm
The first step it is to become aware of both the desire of committing suicide and the desire to hide this. Why do you want to commit suicide? Which are you reasons? What is making you want to hide this reality to yourself and others? And why? Can you nail this down and write it also down? Now that you did this, how does it feels for you reading yourself? If, for just a second, you would imagine to not be a person who wants to suicide, but instead a person who simply wants to build a better life, how would you pin-point the steps to get yourself out of a setting who transformed your desire to have a better life, into a desire to destroy your life? Can you visualize your dream's life in this moment? How does that looks like? From this point on what do you believe you would realistically need to get there? And what, if I tell you that now all the things that didn't work before or had bad luck, would have a completely new chance to work as intended? How? Well, try it yourself! Just by coming here, reading this, giving it space within yourself, you changed a fundamental setting of your inner workings. Now you nourished the skill in yourself to look at things from a new perspective and perceive ways through, through what for you was before an insurmountable obstacle. Please, don't believe me, just try that yourself :)
OptimistiK
September 26th, 2019 7:32pm
First and foremost, know that you aren't alone... cheesy, I know. But it's true! There's a whole global community of people who are sending you love, power, and support (even without you knowing). Second, things really do get better. I say this as someone on "the other side", who attempted suicide and did the whole inpatient/outpatient thing for years. When you're deep in suicidal thought, it may seem like that's really all there is or that that's the most logical option. It may be impossible to envision a future where anything gets, and actually stays, better. But I'm here to say that it does! It get's so much better! It's not without some time and effort, so you can't get discouraged, but it's out there. Third, I'd really encourage you to reach out to someone, but it doesn't have to be someone close to you. You have options- it could be a therapist or a counselor, there are also suicide and mental health hotlines that you can call anonymously and speak to trained professionals, a lot of whom have been exactly where you are now. It may seen terrifying to actually hear yourself say some of your feelings out loud but it helps to take away some of their power. The more I've been able to open up and discuss my struggles with suicide and depression the more I realize that, not only can people relate, but a lot of people have their own experiences as well. Having the strength to share your feelings helps more people than just yourself.
blackRainbows53
October 6th, 2019 7:50am
Chat with us here. So many listeners on 7cups have experience and advice when it comes to suicidal ideation and thoughts. It's SO important to claw out of that bubble when you get to that place, and we are here to listen - as an anonymous stranger! Its easier to talk to someone you don't know about all the messy stuff, and it's the first step in getting help outside. Sometimes being listened to, even by someone you don't know, can help you find the solid ground on which to keep walking. You've got this! Reach out anytime. We're here.
Epikura
October 16th, 2019 4:53pm
It depends on how actively suicidal you are feeling. Take a moment to assess, whether what you are experiencing are fleeting suicidal thoughts, longer lasting thoughts, or whether you already find yourself planning or even taking actual steps towards suicide. If you are experiencing the latter two, seek help immediately. Call the suicide hotline of your country and let them help you. It’s anonymous and free. If you’re not at this stage, I would still advice you to seek help and support. You might find advice Centers that can help you work out a plan that works for you. Those steps aren’t easy to take but you shouldn’t be all alone with these thoughts. Your life is worth protecting, even if at times it’s difficult to see that. And starting to walk a path towards recovery is less scary and more rewarding than you might think right now. As a practical piece of advice, try setting small goals. For the next day, the next week. Don’t look too far ahead if that scares you at the moment, just focus on the present and near future and making it to little milestones again and again. I genuinely wish you all the best.
Anonymous
November 23rd, 2019 1:10am
Honestly, you really need to speak to someone, whether you want to or not. You don't actually want to die, you just dislike your life the way it is. You can get through this, but you're gonna need to open up, admit you have a problem, and seek some help. A good place to start would be to call a suicide help hotline. They might have good advice. Then, you can go from there. Just don't give up. You are awesome and you are worth more than that. I love you, beautiful human. You deserve this life. You are loved.
AChildAtHeart
December 4th, 2019 6:53am
Before acting on your suicidal ideation, make sure that you set aside time to think everything through. Letting out your thought may take the form of journaling or talking to yourself but watch out. Do not tell yourself self-defeating words, but instead tell yourself what you'd say to a friend who is struggling. I understand that it's no easy coping with suicidal thoughts on your own but suicide is not the most suitable measure to address life problems. Indeed, it is a permanent solution to temporary problems. It may be hard for you to trust what I've just said but believe me, you can live a fulfilling life and it is okay to try and try again in the mental health journey. It may not become better after one try but after many tries, you'll soon feel better. Also a reminder that life has ups and downs so hardships will never stop coming at your doors, it is your attitude towards those hardships that determine your satisfaction with life and hardships actually do good for us as they help us become more mature.
MusicLover49
December 14th, 2019 3:49am
What I personally do when these feelings creep in, is I like to put these feelings into writing. I either pull up a note document, or a pen and paper, and I let the feelings flow. Usually in the form of poetry, but it can also be in the form of a story too. I keep writing until there is either a natural end to the piece, or until the feeling passes, I wait for a moment of calm (anytime after the metaphorical cloud leaves) and then I analyze the piece. I see if there was a trigger that was mentioned int he writing, and how I handled it, and then I can learn from it and how to cope with the feelings, if they were to come up again.
majesticSoul2608
December 21st, 2019 2:53am
Telling others is the best way to seek help. It is strongly suggested that to tell others. They cannot help you because they do not know you need it their help. However, if you really really do not want tell others. Here is some method to protect you. 1. Find 5 things that help you feel better when you are thinking about suicidal. 2. Find 5 things that can give you hope. 3. How can you make your environment safer? (For example, throw away dangerous objects/ drugs) Finally, if the above methods do not help. Please, promise me, call the emergency service. You are not alone.
Sugarlife24
January 19th, 2020 7:10am
If you feel suicidal just calm yourself and say that life is just an adventure. Whatever problem you are facing is just part of having new adventures ride on. Just district yourself from that thought. Do stupid things or things u love to do. Listen happy songs. Go for a walk in morning and breathe feel like u just took all the air in you. Feel positive and blessed. If you still feel the same just cry out your sorrow a louder until you feel light and relaxed. Then find out answer to all your problems........ Remember in this whole world there is no such problem that don't carry any solution it's just you have to be patient and discover a best possible solution. And just don't forget to smile 😊
blackMist3479
March 25th, 2020 7:34am
The first thing to ask yourself is what you are afraid will happen if you tell someone. If you fear embarrassment or judgment, is there anyone you can speak with anonymously (such as a listener here if you are able to manage those thoughts or perhaps a crisis volunteer if you are feeling unsafe)? I think a lot of people fear that if they talk about suicidal feelings, they will be sent to the hospital. However, best practice dictates that a client only be taken inpatient if the client is an imminent danger to themselves or to others. In other words, it should be okay to tell a professional that you have these thoughts/feelings and struggle with them. If you have a plan that you intend to carry out in the next 24-48 hours, that is when things would get more serious. However, if you are at that point, you may need a higher level of care that can be found in that kind of setting. I am sure it feels very overwhelming to talk about such things, but isolation and depression are a terrible combination. I hope that you are able to reach out to someone and let them know how you feel.
Daiz24
March 25th, 2020 9:44pm
Before doing it, just stop for a second and read this. Are you reading this? Good, keep following this post and you'll find your answer. Remember that you're valuable and this is just a time in your life where you may feel that you've screwed up to the point of no return - but that's just not true. I suggest you seek professional help immediately by contacting a nearby professional therapist. I was once in a depressed state too and was feeling lonely and suicidal, since I thought that my life was just beyond repair. Reach out to me if you need more help! Stay safe please!
youdefinehope
March 29th, 2020 2:25pm
it might help if you contact helplines but let them know that you'd like to stay anonymous, they can still do their best to help you. it can be scary and hard reaching out but remember, being aware and knowing that you need help is already a step you have taken, now you just have to ask for help - there will be people who are willing to support you. its so important that you let people help you because you are important, and your feelings are valid, even if they make no sense. Please reach out to someone, you matter and you are so so loved.
Anonymous
April 1st, 2020 9:11pm
You should find someone who you can talk to. You shouldnt be going through it alone. But i know how hard it is to open up to someone. Thats why i love 7cups. You can talk to people who know nothing about you so you cant emberass yourself and if you do who cares. Its not like you will be seeing anyone in person. And you can always find a new listener. Find yourself help. Talk to someone here. Its safe and you will find so many people who understand what you are going through. Let yourself to be helped.
Anonymous
April 2nd, 2020 4:17am
First, I'm really sorry that you're feeling this way. It must be really difficult for you. To answer your question, I think it depends on why you don't want to tell anyone. For example, if you're afraid that they will judge you, perhaps you might wanna look for someone who won't judge - e.g. therapist, friends who are non-judgmental, crisis line. If you're concerned about people around you finding out, then there are also others ways - e.g. anonymously talk to the crisis line. Reaching out is a really difficult step and I just want to say that seeking help here is already a good step forward. :)
amazingBlossom1326
April 5th, 2020 3:52am
Always reach out for help as soon as possible if you experience thoughts of suicide. Programs like your local crisis services agency or the national suicide hotline can talk to you in person or over the phone to help you stay safe. It is so important to get help early, before the situation gets worse. Minimize risks as much as possible by telling a friend or family member, staying in places that do not have access to weapons, and by contacting a trained counselor or your primary doctor. You aren't alone in this fight. Keep reaching out and asking for help.
KiarasDomain
April 24th, 2020 7:41pm
You could write in a journal. Or you can talk to me about this. I am here for you every single step of the way and you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. When making hard decisions just remember I am always here and you can always talk to me. I will not judge or discriminate and never think that you are annoying or repulsive towards me. I love my job and I love helping people. I am here for everyone and I will be there for all of you as much as possible. -Burrito
gentleGrotto9119
May 5th, 2020 4:50am
Many women automatically believe that an ex ignoring them means it is because of something bad when that isn’t always the case. It may be surprising to you but your ex may be ignoring you because he actually still cares for you and has feelings for you. Breaking up with someone is a highly emotional roller coaster full of confusing emotions as you know yourself as you’re going through it yourself. Everyone reacts to breakups differently though and him ignoring you may be a way for him to heal from the breakup. While you may be ready to start talking again, he might not. He made need more time to get over it and heal before he can be ready to talk. In this instance it is important to not make this about you. It is clear that he still has hurt feelings and ignoring you is a way for him to keep his head clear to be able to think clearly.
Charlie6721
May 8th, 2020 7:34pm
If you are feeling suicidal it is very important to pin-point what is triggering these thoughts. If you know that it is serious, be sure to reach out to a suicide hotline. It is anonymous and no one in your life has to find out, however having a support system is crucial and I would highly recommend finding just one person you can trust and sharing your feelings with them. In times like this, it always feels worse to be alone and feel like you are misunderstood, therefore having someone you can trust who genuinely cares about your feelings, will help you overcome this battle.
lucywormie
May 21st, 2020 1:35am
If you’re not comfortable telling someone near you then perhaps contacting a suicide hotline would be best. If you find a specific thing is the reason for why you’re feeling this way then perhaps see if there’s a way you can help with that. Or contact a hotline that’s specific to the reason you’re feeling suicidal. Talking to somebody, no matter whom, is the best path because they can help you through it. Did something trigger you to feel this way? Is there perhaps something you can do or have done before that’s helped? A suicide hotline may be best or if you think you’re in imminent danger of harming yourself then call your national emergency line. If you’re unsure of your suicide hotline number then go to suicide.org. There’s always people there so try to reach out
Anonymous
May 28th, 2020 5:06pm
Take your time, don't rush. Think, why do I feel this way? Why wouldn't I'd like to speak to anyone? Do I feel like I'm a moment away from doing it or am I just entertaining the thought? If you are entertaining the thought then maybe speaking to a close friend can help or letting your emotions out in someway (everyone has a diffrent way). Feeling suicidal isn't forever and it's hardly a rational time (even if it feels rational at the time doesn't mean it is). One doesn't need to tell everything in one go, sometimes just telling a few hints can help (or not). But taking your time to think through your emotions and thoughts is probably the best option.
Crysys
May 29th, 2020 2:24pm
Tell someone. If you're actively suicidal it needs to be an actual person around you who can help, if it's just passive it may suffice simply to write in a journal or talk to someone online. As much as it's difficult to tell someone, holding it all in can absolutely destroy a person. With active suicidality where you genuinely are wanting to commit, and have a plan or have reached a point where you are capable of going through with it in the moment, someone needs to be aware so they can help you and intervene if necessary. Even just with passive suicidal thoughts simply allowing it to eat away at you until they may evolve into active suicidal thoughts, or even if they just remain passive but persist, it's important not to allow yourself to be dragged down by it
Tessfoundyourvibes
May 31st, 2020 5:27am
Talking about it is a great first step. I had this problem. Music got me through it. I used this site to tell someone. Even though they couldn't know me, it felt nice to let it out. It can be difficult to tell people, but it is definitely a good first step. Remember to take care of yourself. Doing research on ways to boost serotonin. The internet can help you. Telling people online can make you heard. This can make you feel much better. I beleive telling people is one of the best ways to improve. I hope you feel better friend