Moderated by
Stacey Kiger, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
My belief is that therapy is not about giving advice, but joining you on your journey
Top Rated Answers
Never tell them it will be okay, because it may not. But let them know that you are here for them, and that is is okay to not be okay. Let them know that there are ways to learn to manage it, and if they ever need anyone you will be there. Tell them you love them and them being depressed doesn't change it because theyre not their disorder
Anonymous
May 21st, 2016 9:30am
I know it may look incredibly bleak for you right now. These feelings are only temporary and I'll be right there with you. It’s you and me against the depression, and we will win.
When someone is dealing with depression, it's hard to truly understand what they are going through. While many people experience depression, each and every person's experience will be different just like their journey to recovery. The best thing to say is not that you understand, but that you are there for them. I can promise you that it will mean the world to that person.
Anonymous
May 22nd, 2016 10:19am
That person needs to know that you will be there for them 100% even if it just means you're just there for them to talk to
Show compassion. Listen. Be kind and understanding. Never try and force someone to 'get better' and be patient wherever possible.
I find a good, warm hug often makes me feel a lot better (if the person likes hugs), then followed by "what's on your mind?", "is there anything you'd like to talk about?", "how are you REALLY going?" . I don't know... Usually it's difficult to really relate to the person, so the hug is just a non-verbal way of saying "I'm here, and I care about you", which is what is really important I think.
Anonymous
June 1st, 2016 5:28am
Sometimes company is the best medicine for someone that is depressed. Showing that you care and will always be there for them is a wonderful way to express this. Always lend a ear to listen to what they have to say, this will help them feel important and heard.
Tell them that it's a real emotion and that it's not in their head. Sometimes validating what they're feeling is the best thing you can do. Offer to help them get through the rough patch they're in however you can and if they struggle, tell them that you understand it won't be easy, but that you know they can do it.
Anonymous
June 3rd, 2016 2:09am
You firstly have to try and understand their situation and their current feelings. The best thing to do is comfort them and be supportive. Make sure they know they aren't alone and you're willing to be with them the whole journey. Your friendship is going to be something they rely on and value. It isn't really about what you "say" to them, it's more or less how much you stand beside them and help them through it.
You don't actually have to say anything. You just need to make sure they know they aren't alone. Be there for them when they need you - comfort them.
I'd say that it's nothing to feel embarrassed or ashamed by. Millions of people go through it. I'd say that even if you think no one understands what you're going through, lots of people do. I'd say that they shouldn't be afraid to reach out and ask for help
Well, please don't give them spiels about 'others have it worse.' Usually telling someone with depression that they can count on you to listen to their cries is enough.
Anonymous
June 9th, 2016 11:08am
You could say something in the line of:
- I'm here for you.
- You're not alone.
- This is not your fault.
- What kind of thoughts are you having?
And sometimes is better to say nothing at all, but be there for them, listen and be empathetic.
Your depression doesn't define you. You're more than that. You're better. You can go through that and survive.
It will get better. Sadness doesn't last forever. This is your journey to figure out though because I can't help you every step of the way, but it will be okay.
I only know this from personal experience, but when I was depressed, what brought me out was thinking about all the things that were worth living for, like the activities that I enjoyed and the people I cared about. Also knowing that other people care about you helps a whole heap.
You should let them know that what they are feeling is normal and understandable. You should let them know that what they are thinking at the moment isn't forever. Their thoughts are corrupted by the cloud of depression but it is treatable. Basically, you should be there for them and not push anything on them
"Hey, hang in there. There will always be someone who loves you tremendously, it might even be someone whom you didn't really expect to be- but there will always be someone. You might not believe me for now, sure, but as a hero once said, 'Believe in me who believes in you'"
Anonymous
July 15th, 2016 2:12pm
You really cannot say much to a depressed person. They are usually so deep in their own problems, that anything you say will anger them. Just be there for them, if they wish to talk. Take care.
Anonymous
June 11th, 2016 10:35am
You don't really need to say much but hello. If they are your friend ...give them a hug. If they are your spouse ...treat them like king or queen and give them a hug. The power of hugs is amazing.
Sometimes just being there for someone is enough. If you don't know what to say then ask them if there is anything that person wants you to do for him/her. If you don't understand the situation to why someone is feeling depressed then ask him/her questions to help you understand. Make clear that even though you don't understand the way they are feeling, you are not judging them for their actions/behavior,feelings or thoughts.
This question is a bit vague, but I would say that the best thing you can do for someone is depressed is just to be there to listen. Letting them know that you are available and willing to listen, because not everyone needs to be told they are depressed or what they could/should be doing. If they ask you directly for advice, you can always point them in the direction of a professional but I would say that most of the time, they just want someone to listen without judgement.
This isnt the easiest of situations sometimes i feel i just aint able to reach out to them but with some i do strike a cord and i am able to move forward ........
Anonymous
July 17th, 2016 9:02pm
You will always be there for them no matter what...
There is not much that you can say to someone to "cure" them, but mostly, it's just helpful for them to hear that you care about them and that you're here for them. Don't try to fix them or solve their problems or try too hard to cheer them up or negate their feelings. Just tell them that you're sorry they're having a hard time, but you love them and you're here to listen and help in whatever way they need. Sometimes just knowing someone is listening and cares can help.
Anonymous
July 2nd, 2016 7:03am
Always let them know that your there for them always and too reassure them that everything will be better in time
Anonymous
July 2nd, 2016 7:16pm
You have every right to feel bad, do not underestimate your pain. You will get through this eventually and I'll be by your side.
I'm sorry that you're feeling that way, and I might not be able to help but I'll just be here for you as much as I can. I love you and together we can get through this.
These 'I know how you feel' and 'You should do this and that' not gonna work for sure. You just be supportive and encouraging when they reach out to you.
First, you should say to them you're here for them. That they are important for you, and that you care a lot about them. But, never tell them their problems are small, or compare their depression with other persons' one, it will makes them feel less worthy, and guilty.
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