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Whats worse, a tear that shows your depression or a fake smile that covers it?

40 Answers
Last Updated: 01/30/2018 at 7:52pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
Moderated by

Tanyia Hughes, Adv Dip Psy

Psychotherapist

I have been through a lot in life too, which helps me to be able to empathize with situations, thoughts and feelings that we have. Sometimes, it's not easy just being human.

Top Rated Answers
5ense
February 26th, 2015 7:22pm
Crying or showing your depression is not wrong or bad in any way, neither is a fake smile that covers it. These are ways to cope and everyone copes differently. Additionaly, keeping your feelings for yourself is never good.
EmmaSupportiveListener
February 26th, 2015 11:23pm
It depends on the context. If you're at work, it might not always be appropriate to show emotions (sad I know!). It might also not be safe to show a tear in front of a bully of an intolerant or mean person! However most of the time I think being authentic (in front of people we trust particularly) is good because then they know to comfort us and talking to us about our situation. If we hide it then we tend to bottle it up and it gets worse over time.
SailorAna
August 4th, 2015 5:51am
For me, it would be the fake smile that covers it. Why? Because one step towards recovering from depression is to not be ashamed of having it, and not wasting so much precious energy faking. When you show it, you open yourself to receive the love of your friends and family, and their help in turn. You open roads of communication about what is troubling you with your loved ones. And little by little, you start realizing that there isn't something wrong with you, that depression attacks a lot of people and a lot of people have beaten it, and then you start speaking out your needs so you get therapy/meds/long talks/comprehension/stress relief, etc.
lovelyOcean15
August 24th, 2015 5:29pm
A fake smile is worse one to cover my depression. To me, crying may express and vent out my feelings instead of having a fake smile on my face telling everyone that I am okay but I am not.
niamhXxxx
December 29th, 2015 12:44pm
Sometimes a tear is good. Embracing your emotions rather than bottling them up is better for you own health. Showing your vulnerablity to someone close to you can lead to help from them and also stronger bonds with friends. Showing your depressed is not a sign of weakness, it's a sign that you've noticed you're not well and are trying to improve your life which is always good.
Charlie982
November 30th, 2015 9:35pm
A fake smile by far. There's no shame in crying or in admitting that you need a bit of help, but covering it up with a fake smile will only make things worse.
heavenlyNutella74
January 30th, 2018 7:52pm
A fake smile that covers it. We should let pur emotions flow, tell someone how we feel. Just get stiff of our chest because this pile of emotions could cause damage if we don't let things out.
lovelyLake94
December 15th, 2015 2:42am
You never want to put on a fake smile to cover depression. There are people out there to help you out if you need help. Don't hide it.
bluemapleleaf
February 23rd, 2016 9:32pm
A fake smile that covers it is almost always worse. If you're in a situation where you need to take care of someone else's needs however, a fake smile might be necessary temporarily.
healingSunshine24
March 1st, 2016 2:31am
A fake smile is worse than a tear in many ways because you're hiding what you need help with from everyone. No one can help you if they don't know that something is wrong. In other ways, it shows that you are strong, but you also shouldnt have to be because of that.
Anonymous
June 21st, 2016 5:09am
It is ok to feel. We all have emotions and it is healthy to be able to express them, feel them, label them and ride them out. As such it is worse to fake a smile that covers pain.
helpfulsam99
July 14th, 2016 5:37am
I think the worst thing about depression goes beyond being sad or faking a smile. The worst part is when you feel so terrible that you shut down and can't express ANY emotion, even a fake one.
coolvibes
July 18th, 2016 10:03am
People use many different coping mechanisms to get through their day. there are times when either letting your emotions lose in a safe environment is highly appropriate versus times when temporarily faking a smile will feel safer then attracting unwanted attention to your private situation while in a public arena.
MsWhite
July 19th, 2016 12:12pm
A fake smile that covers it! Definitely that. A tear that shows your depression will tell others you're sad, might make others think you're weak, might instigate other people to make fun of you. But a fake smile that covers depression will slowly kill you. Please don't do that. Out of hundreds of people who see your tears, I guarantee you there will be one person who'll come forward, help you, guide you. If you don't show it, you cant expect people to know about it, and then you cant expect people to help you.
BasilAngel
August 2nd, 2016 1:02am
A fake smile, because a tear is showing how you feel and your true emotions. That's like asking what's worse, a bad truth, or a good lie? The lie will be found out, and could backfire. Among your family and friends, a tear will only result in people trying to help rather than assuming you're fine when you aren't
Anonymous
August 23rd, 2016 8:42pm
I think that a fake smile is worse because it's easier to cry, but harder to fake a smile and attitude.
thoughtfulPomegranate86
September 5th, 2016 11:12pm
What is best is genuinely being able to smile when out in public. I understand wanting to hide your depression from there people around you, but you shouldn't have to!
QuietlyBurningCandle
November 7th, 2016 10:49pm
I would say a smile. Because although a tear might be difficult to deal with, it mights ultimately allow you to get the help you need.
friendlyPerspective32
January 9th, 2017 5:50am
I personally think that a fake smile masking your true emotions is much worse than showing your inner feelings. I don't exactly understand what is wrong with being vulnerable, but society would argue that negative feelings is a sign of weakness and imperfection when, in fact, it's much more important and healthier for us to share the emotions we have bottled up inside of us with our friends and family than to keep them to ourselves. I'm sure that all of us has experienced unhappiness (with many others diagnosed with depression), but keeping our thoughts in our head won't do us any good in the long-term in my opinion.
Angsa314
April 4th, 2017 2:12pm
A fake smile that covers it. Sometimes the reason why we have depression is because we need someone there to care for us. But if we were to always fake a smile, no one would know how weak we really are. Its okay to be weak sometimes as long as we get back onto our feet again!!
TheRipplingPond
October 31st, 2017 7:06am
The fake smile. There’s nothing worse than faking it when all you want to do is not feel trapped in your emotions anymore. Depression is already exhaustive, so imagine how much more it is to put up a front. You suppress yourself so much that it builds up, which is not healthy at all. Some people at the worse, if you show your true emotions, that’s better than feeling trapped. You get a a beautiful relief and freedom letting yourself experience what you feel at the moment.
Akshita0612
January 8th, 2018 1:39pm
The fake smile that covers it is worse. We should let our feelings out be it a tear, letting your emotions out help in releasing the negativity and pain from our body which is good for mental health. If we keep our feelings/emotions inside and cover it up with a smile we are trapping our pain and negativity inside which will harm us eventually.
ALovingPeony
June 17th, 2015 5:12am
A tear. Or even better, lots of tears. Being able to feel safe enough to show your genuine emotion is a very important part of healing.
Konohura
March 18th, 2015 10:39am
The smile that covers it is worse, that smile is like a cork bottling all your pain and chaos in your mind. Let the tears come, let yourself cry, crying is not a sign of a weakness, it's a sign of strength. Those who cry admit their weakness, and show the will to strengthen themselves.
Alwaysdreamin
March 19th, 2015 12:29am
Crying is letting out the pain. It is a sign that you are accepting it. Acceptance is a part of getting better. This is normal and actually healthy for people who are depressed. You probably know how hard it is to hold it in and have that fake smile. For me, it only caused greater depression, however, everyone is different. There is so much more freedom now that I am open about my depression. Tell others that you trust.
PashT007
April 11th, 2015 3:22am
A smile that tries to cover depression is worse because you can't get help or overcome if you are in denial or trying to hide it. Nothing wrong with showing emotions, it may make you feel better. Allow your emotions to flow, tears shed heaviness.
cordial2394
May 1st, 2015 6:42am
It depends.. are you with friends.. or are you at work trying to be professional.. among friends its okay to have a tear or two.. at work, especially if you are working directly with the customer, or in sales, a lot of times it will damage your ability to perform your job (unless you are on the phone or computer and they can't see your face).. if you are working and unable to show your emotions at the moment I would purposefully pick a method to express your feelings to another person or to a journal, someone safe, where it won't impact a job performance review.
JustLikeaDream
May 20th, 2015 2:13am
Fake smile that covers it. You don't have to open up to everyone, but it's not healthy to bottle everything inside and avoid dealing with your feelings. Try to talk to a close friend, or someone you trust. You don't have to tell them everything you're going through, but maybe a part of it to lighten your load, if you're comfortable with it.
enchantingMonkey63
May 30th, 2015 4:11am
A fake smile, from experience :)
Anonymous
May 30th, 2015 2:30pm
A fake smile that covers it, simply because you're delaying any chance of helping yourself, or denying other people chance to prove that they want to support you.