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Why can't I just feel happy?

105 Answers
Last Updated: 04/07/2018 at 10:42am
Why can't I just feel happy?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Evelyn Coker, MSW, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I am down to earth and enjoy working with all clients. I have a special passion to support teen girls and women. My work is nonjudgmental and provides a safe space to grow.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
July 17th, 2016 10:07am
To be honest, in the grand scheme of things, the reason we can be happy is because something is always holding us back, whether it be an ex partner, family, friends or yourself, something or someone is always holding you back, and the only way to pull away from it all is to learn to do things for yourself, to love yourself, to treat yourself right and to show others that you dont need them, all you need is you, you are the only one who can make you feel happy, no one else. You are you and you are the only one who can change things for you.
Lindsaylu
July 27th, 2016 5:55pm
While I was in therapy about a year ago now for my depression and anxiety, a therapist that i talked to told me that happiness and fun is a skill. it's something that you learn over time and sometimes when you are depressed you lose that skill. Everything that made you happy before now doesn't mean anything to you. Trust me, i know how hard that can be. So I would suggest trying something new. the upside to not having anything that makes you happy is you get to start all over. Try baking if you've never baked, start going for a walk every morning, try out for a sport, whatever it is that you are into i urge you to try it and see where it goes. sometimes you're going to try something and it isn't going to do anything for you but there might be something you try that you end up really loving. Hope this helps :)
Anonymous
July 30th, 2016 10:07am
Happiness isn't the result but the choice.. if you don't want to be happy.. then no one could make you happy.. if you want to be happy.. try to be happy.. expect less from people.. and don't burden yourself with expectations.. think about your betterment.
Marianne1234
July 30th, 2016 12:58pm
This is because you are letting negative thoughts in and positive thoughts out. You should loose the negatives and get the positives.
Anonymous
July 30th, 2016 2:55pm
Maybe you feeling empty inside, like your missing something. Ask yourself what don't I have in my Life that would make it better?
Anonymous
August 4th, 2016 4:35am
Sometimes, it is an easy as making yourself feel happy. There are many reasons why you could feel this way. One of the best ways to determine why you are feeling this way would be to seek professional help or talk to a therapist, just to be sure nothing is really wrong.
Thezenone
February 8th, 2016 9:49am
Because you are looking in the wrong place. Find something in your life that gives you joy and embrace it.
Anonymous
February 15th, 2016 1:11am
because one of the true happiness of life as well as sadness.We have to accept happiness.We have to meet the misery in respect
HandyDandyDestiny27
February 19th, 2016 3:34am
Happiness is a gift. Everyone's not able to receive happiness because they're too busy trying to find it. Let happiness find you. Sometimes, it will find you when you least expect it. Patience is key.
Vaux
February 20th, 2016 5:52pm
Sometimes you can't feel happy because you're thinking too much on the negative side. You can't seem to find the positive around you, so you can't be happy.
JustACutie
February 25th, 2016 4:56pm
I sometimes worry too much about things I shouldn't. They often turn out to be fine in the end. xD That's what sometimes keeps me from happiness.
Anonymous
March 6th, 2016 2:30pm
There are a lot of reasons why people feel certain emotions. It can be hard to figure out at times, but trust me that there is always a light at the end of every dark spot in your lifetime.
TheMetanoia
March 13th, 2016 5:36am
Happiness is a state u need to induce to enjoy... what i have discovered is, Be invested in the happiness of the people you love. Don't seek your happiness from external sources. Seek fun, knowledge, adventure that make u happy Recognize the importance of every chapter in your life. Say feelings out loud. Be dedicated to something that you care about. Accept change as a partner in your growth. Get to know yourself & have your back the same way you would a friend's. Growing into yourself > growing up (more fun, more effective). As much as possible be around people where you are comfortably, unequivocally yourself. And finally, do goofy stuff and laugh as much as possible. Be happy with yourself and spread the joy :-)
Redstar05
March 15th, 2016 9:34am
This question pops in our mind every single day. I don't know why it has to end up like this, we all deserve to be happy, but we keep asking ourselves, "Why didn't I feel happiness at all? I thought we deserve it?" Right? Right. But try to start focusing on the bright side, it isn't that hard, if you'll get used to it, you'll feel good. Really good, And that's when you're gonna realize that you're now.....happy :).
Anonymous
March 16th, 2016 7:37am
" Pursuit of happiness " what we all do in our lives , no doubt , some deny that , because they lost happiness , but never means they don't want it...Happiness has various standards according to different people ,..Lack of happiness , can come with lots of factors as well..Like losing a beloved one ,which is called " grief " ..failing in specific areas in life , suffering from illnesses , both physical and mental have significant impact on lack of happiness...
Anonymous
March 16th, 2016 11:43pm
Because life is an awful place. The key is to forget. Make yourself happy. Live life like there is no tomorrow. That makes me happy. And I'm miserable
beccarose99
March 23rd, 2016 6:18pm
You might be surrounding yourself with the wrong people, or doing the wrong things. Thinking about how you feel when you're with certain people or doing certain things can help determine what makes you happy. Health also ties in a lot with happiness, so if you're healthy, like eating healthy and exercising, you may notice that you begin to feel more happy.
ladyxruin
March 24th, 2016 12:57am
Being happy is a process that takes time and effort. Learning about what you love and enjoy is a life long process and happiness finds you when you least expect it to.
zaix
March 25th, 2016 1:01am
no one is happy all the time, but sometimes we aren't happy often enough. Do things you love! get all of the bad thoughts out of your head and do you, do things that make you happy.
gracefulYellow39
March 27th, 2016 7:36pm
It might because I feel stressed. Overwhelmed. Life is always showing rocks at you and if I don't do something about it, the rocks pile up. Until I start clearing them, I won't feel free and continue to be buried..more..and more.
compassionateSunshine76
April 8th, 2016 7:03am
because you don't have to feel happy when you are actually happy. so try making the things make you happy rather than stressing you to be happy.
pleasinglyPoetic
April 9th, 2016 6:11pm
If you "can't" feel happy, it may be because you're not merely sad, but depressed. Depression differs from sadness in that it is a mental illness, and cannot be cured by merely "cheering up" or enjoying some ice cream. If you suspect that you may be depressed, I recommend speaking with your primary care provider about it.
Anonymous
April 10th, 2016 6:37am
Each new day, Each new breath of air, I feel I m lost in this world .. Its meticulous to hear the sound of someones heart beat that fills ur mood with happiness.. This is just for that one girl. :)
MovingCastle
April 10th, 2016 1:03pm
I found I was able to feel happy after I gave myself permission. I used to think I didn't deserve it
ImagineThatHappening
April 21st, 2016 7:20pm
Becoming happy can happen just by smilin at yourself in the mirror, to spending hours doing a favourite hobby of possibly just being with people that can make you forget about the bad occurring in your everyday life
Anonymous
April 22nd, 2016 6:37pm
Because we always thinking about the future and depressing our self. we should live the moment that we have for now and try to spread happiness.
peacefulIris56
April 23rd, 2016 2:53pm
It depends on your situation. What is making you unhappy? Are they thoughts, things happening in life or no explanation. You need to examine your thoughts and life and situation and go from there.
PeaceWalker
April 24th, 2016 10:36am
You must make a conscious decision to be happy. And if that fails, it is essential that you remember that depression is simply a chemical imbalance in your brain.
calmspirit
April 27th, 2016 2:11pm
We have days where we are happy, we have days where we feel less than okay. It's completely normal, if life was happy 24/7 then we wouldn't learn from our choices in life. Can't have a rainbow without a little rain.
booklover1224
April 27th, 2016 4:11pm
Happiness isn't as simple as it seems. If you are experiencing a lot of lows, it could be because of the current situation, or something running deeper than that. Specific situations have different paths to follow so you can grow and heal.