Why do depressed people push loved ones away?

They do this because they feel that they are not enough for their loved ones. They feel like burdens to them and push them away so that the loved ones will not be burdened by them. They also feel that they are not enough for their loved ones to love them unconditionally.

Mostly because they feel like a burden because the feelings are too much to handle, or that others won't understand/validate their feelings or try to be there for them, like there is no point in letting people in but that is the depression talking. People with depression are constantly experiencing pain and other negative feelings that sometimes feel so overwhelming to them and it takes time until they learn and understand better whats going on in their heads. Explaining it to others is sometimes difficult, besides not knowing what will make them feel better because nothing really does, again the depression affecting everything. Telling them that you are willing to listen and following through and checking up regularly will make a difference and will help them open up about it even if its not accepted right away.

Depressed people tend to have a low sense of self-worth. They feel like they don't deserve to be cared for by their loved ones, sometimes even believing that they are simply a burden to them.

Because we're always afraid that they'll leave us, and sometimes because we feel like we're bothering them, and we don't want to hurt them with our depression.

Because, when people are depressed, they feel as if they are not worth anyone's time or they believe that they will just bring others down with them.

Won't know if they'll truly know how to help, if they'll make it worse or if they'd take you seriouly of how you feel.

In my own experience, when someone is depressed they push away their loved ones because they are afraid of hurting them. It is best if the person that is depressed talks to their loved ones or even a counselor as to why they're depressed. It could help overcoming the depression and to help your loved ones understand why you're depressed.

Well, we usually don't want to hurt anyone we love. But, it's mainly because we have trust issues. We think if other people have messed us up you will do the exact same. Because, if someone else screwed us over then why won't you? Sometimes, we feel as if it's too close for comfort. Have you ever gotten so incredibly comfortable talking with someone that it makes you be alright talking to them about things you would not even once talk about with anyone, not one person? If you haven't then had anyone ever talk about you behind your back? Because, if yes for both or just one well we think you will for sure do that to us. We are also super insecure so we think you are using us for something other than what you say you are REALLY doing.

Well, the major reason can be of hurting the person you love the most through your actions, fear of losing them in the worst state. Depression is an illness that many could heal and many still trying. In this state of mind, you distance yourself from everyone the reason can be that you feel extreme suffocation. People constantly ask you to talk, to smile, in which a person in this state can get exhausted. Fewer connections help them think and have time for themselves. Not everyone can be close and lovable, but there are flaws in everything. Many don't want their loved ones to see them in this state. Depression can be also the state where people don't believe you and accuse you of faking it or trying to grab attention which can lead to severe stress and mental exhaustion, they will tell that how colorful the world is but as they say you are color blind. I think this is the primary reason.

From my experience, when I was at my lowest I pushed away loved ones so I could not hurt them. As much as I told myself that it was for the better, they still got hurt. Sometimes I felt I was disappointing them and that I may rub off on them. I did not want my loved ones to be depressed as well, I would have rather taken on everything. I also thought that they would be less hurt if I passed on. There are a lot of reasons, but these are some I have experienced directly. I hope this helps, best wishes!

Why do we push them away? To not make it hurt them all that much when you kill yourself. So that our family wouldn't be that disappointed when they find out you're depressed. So that our friends wouldn't panic and rush to save you or tell you that you're being over dramatic. Or that you never come out of your room, so you loved ones don't see the real you. So they can't see the sadness in your eyes, the pain in your smile. You just want them to think you're okay. You're just trying to protect them. (This is all based on my personal experiences.)

When people are depressed they are almost constantly down. They feel like they bring down others. That feeling of being a burden makes them pull away. Also people don't want to be seen in such a vulnerable state so they avoud other people. They can feel ashamed of their sadness or not being able to overcome whatever triggered it. Another reason is that sometimes they don't really understand why they are down so often. That can be hard to explain to other people. It's also that people who are depressed simply don't have the energy to socialise. They might be struggling with the most basic of tasks and everything else might feel overwhelming.

Most people who suffer from depression tend to distance themselves from their loved ones. The reasons for this could range from feeling burdened or being hurt by someone to hurting someone or being hurt by someone in the past. People sometimes struggle to respond when asked how they are because they don't wish to let someone down because they're doing well or they don't want to divulge their true feelings. Moreover, many people are wary of getting attached to someone and struggle with trust problems, as well. Moreover, it can be very hard to open up to someone no matter how long they've known them, and they might also be afraid of what other people might think about them if they found out about their situation, if they would believe in them or not, or if the bond would still remain the same if their loved one finds out that they're depressed.

Sometimes, depressed people feel that they deserve to be left alone. They already have a lot going on and they feel so unmotivated to meet new people and talk to. They sometimes do not mean to push the loves ones away, they just want to be left alone... They don't want to feel like a burden to other members and that's why they get kinda defensive and pushy. They have moments where they feel sad over the things that have happened and try to deal with them on their own, something which is really hard as they have a lot already in their plate.

People who are depressed tend to question, ‘Am I depressed?’ a lot. As such, this has also happened to me. Although we ultimately understand that our loved ones have our best interest, when we feel depressed, with or without specific reason(s), we are oftentimes confused from the rumination itself. It’s not something we can explain to those we push away, thus we mostly just self-isolate to save ourselves from having the tough conversations. Negative thoughts grow at an exponential rate during these times, hence, thinking and simply believing that nobody likes being around someone depressed can be one of the reasons for pushing people away. Being so, we are constantly afraid that one might eventually become tired of our depressed self and leave us. Attachment issues and fear of abandonment can also be a factor of a tendency to drive people out when things are getting serious between two or more people. An approach that made me feel specially supported during those times was when a close friend decided to step up and talked to me in a way that didn’t require me to explain much of what it was that I was going through. Because honestly, I didn't understand it at that time either. I didn't feel pushed or forced to provide an explanation but I was reassured by their actions that there is someone who truly cares by showing patience and genuine care when dealing with me. And only then, I felt safe to open up with them slowly.