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Why do I always think everything I do is wrong?

206 Answers
Last Updated: 03/04/2022 at 12:05am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Polly Letsch, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I provide non-judgmental, person-centered, objective therapeutic treatment for individuals of all ages to improve social, emotional, mental and other areas of functioning.

Top Rated Answers
Ribz
September 25th, 2020 4:23am
all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy all work and no play makes jack a dull boy
BSWwork
October 1st, 2020 10:27am
It can feel like everything you do is wrong but just remember that is is the story we tell ourselves that can make a difference in the way we think. What would it look like if you said to yourself "Everything I do is always right?" How do you think that would make you feel? Do you think you would start to think differently? Remember you were created the way you are for a reason. You are "perfect" because you are you and there is absolutely nothing inherently wrong with you. It is very important to be empowered and to love yourself. This can help you recognize that you cannot be doing everything wrong all the time.
Sweetirrific
October 9th, 2020 1:57am
The real question is, were you always told you were doing something wrong since you were a kid ? By parents, teachers, peers, older siblings perhaps ? This could be a reason why you tend to feel as though everything you did was wrong. Although, realizing your own value and supporting yourself rather than blaming yourself for everything can slowly change this way of thinking. Forgiving yourself and realizing that you are human, whenever you feel like you did a mistake is a way you can feel much better about situations and feel more confident in your decisions and actions.
katherine081902
October 11th, 2020 9:19pm
We are our own harshest critics. It's cheesy, but it's true. Maybe someone has commented on things you do and made it seem like everything is wrong which has carried to today. Self love has a lot to do with accepting what you do as good enough. Self examine and figure out what about the things you do seems wrong. Is it that you don't think you're good enough? That links back to self love. Being optimistic and embracing yourself goes a long way in feeling and even being successful. Talking to a listener on here can help boost your confidence. I hope this helps you!
bubblegumPuppy68
October 25th, 2020 3:31am
Bad Programming, Being told that in childhood by your caregivers. A faulty program before you were old enough to reason it out so you began to blame your self and that program got stunk in your mind and you have fed it and fed it until now we are older aIt did not happen overnight and it won't change overnight until we are willing to begin to dove down and examine these negative thoughts we have about our selves. It takes work to change and a willingness to do the work for the changes. You lack confidence, you don't trust yourself. It is not your fault that you think and feel that way but it is a lie. So until you begin to make that inner critic shut its mouth it will keep yelling in your ear that You can't do anything right or that you are not good enough. That Stinking Thinking. You Can be that bold confident person you desire to be. But it will cost you time to work on you and to really meet that awesome person just waiting to evovle.
Anonymous
October 30th, 2020 6:30pm
This doesn't sound like a nice way to feel. It can't be easy feeling that way all the time. It's really important to remember that you are not alone in feeling like this and I am always here to chat if you need, as a one off or as a regular, scheduled chat. Can I ask what makes you feel that what you are doing is always wrong? If a close friend of yours in a similar situation felt the same way, would you agree with them? How would you reassure them? Do you think the same could be true in your situation?
globalSummer9832
November 15th, 2020 3:19am
Sometimes we tend to compare ourselves with others, whether it is on social media, at school or even within our family, without really knowing what goes behind the scenes. It's common for us to take our worst moments and compare them to someone else's highlights and that makes us feel like if we were doing everything wrong. We don't even take the time to question if what we are seeing is realistic or even accurate in our own situation. In reality, we all have our mistakes, ups and downs and we should not blame ourselves for it. Those mistakes and feelings of disappointment towards ourselves can actually teach us more about our mindset: what we are expecting of ourselves, the pressure we put on ourselves and how we talk to us, so we might take it from there to start having more self compassion.
rayofsunshine888
November 20th, 2020 8:33am
it's completely normal to feel that everything you do never takes a good turn or that you're messing everything up. but that's not true. life isn't about doing a right without messing the wrongs.. messing up is an achievement, a blessing, a lesson... you can learn from your wrongs more than you can learn from anything. and if you keep doing wrongs and learning from them, you'll reach a right! don't feel frustrated because you aren't able to work things as they "should" be. you'll realize you're amazing and that you've done great one day, maybe not tomorrow or the day after, but one day trust me.
flowwing
November 26th, 2020 1:41am
Several studies show that our brain remembers negative events more deeply than positive ones. This comes from our evolutionary need to survive, because the lion hiding in the jungle was more important for us to focus on than the sunlight filtering through the trees or beauty of the day. But now that we're modern humans, that same focus that helped us survive now works against us. When you find yourself reminiscing about a time when you feel like you failed, try and counteract this by acknowledging the positive impact you had on the situation, even if there were negative aspects too. There will be times when this feels impossible, but I've found that lying in bed at the end of the day, it helps to think about a small way in which I grew that day, however tiny. If it helps, you can talk to a friend or loved one (or a listener!)
Anonymous
November 29th, 2020 11:13pm
Everyone is right at sometimes and wrong sometimes, so there are definitely going to be times when you are wrong. I think understanding and accepting that is important, but forgiving yourself is also important. But having faith in yourself and trusting yourself is key to confidence. Building self-confidence is difficult but you must be confident in yourself to believe in yourself and your decisions. Believing that you are capable to make your own decisions and knowing your worth will allow you to feel satisfied with your choices. Once you gain confidence, you will stop doubting yourself each time and feel free.
KatieAListener
December 20th, 2020 9:20pm
We tend to have other peoples opinions, attitudes, perspectives, and beliefs absorbed into our own brain. Since we were young, we have always been listening to others and have been learning from others since the beginning of our time. We as human beings sometimes fail to create our own values and build our own philosophies and become limited to the ones that have been imposed on us and whether we have yet broken from that spell or not. It can be completely difficult when someone you love says something you are doing is wrong, but what someone is doing may not necessarily be 'wrong' for THEM. People have different outlooks on life and just because one person would not make those choices does not mean another shouldn't. For example, if I am not attracted to someone, but someone else is, should no one go after that individual because I think one way and the other person doesn't match my belief? No!
Anonymous
January 2nd, 2021 2:03pm
It sounds like you may have some anxiety. I do as well and it can lie to you. It can make you feel things that aren't true. It can make you feel like you're always in the wrong even when you're not. Maybe so some research on the subject and even speak to someone about the issue. They can help you maybe find the underlying issues and help you move on and heal from it. Anxiety can do some crazy things to you and to your self image. I've been b dealing with it for a long time.
sunshineandpuppies
January 28th, 2021 1:20am
I feel like that if you believe that everything you are doing is wrong then you are not believing in your self, and hold doubt in your capabilities. This feeling might be because you are uncertain about what you are doing at the moment and your confusion makes you think that everything is wrong and nothing is right. I feel like the best thing to do in this situation is stop, take a deep breath, and believe in yourself. It is hard, and writing it out is much easier than physically believing it, but it is doable. Only then can you be able to start thinking that your actions are right, and feel confident about them.
Anonymous
February 11th, 2021 5:50pm
Personally, I feel the same way. The things I do are always going wrong which gets very stressful at times. The most important thing to do is try and focus on the things you get right. Its draining to be dragged down by the things you have done wrong, you feel bad about it enough in the moment but thinking it later on will solve nothing at all. The positive things will keep you up feeling like you are actually capable of doing things right and effectively. The things you do wrong can almost be solved. Positivity is key.
Lugi123
February 25th, 2021 8:13pm
Hi there! Thank you for your question. This is something I have experienced myself. We tend to be our own worst critic at times. Usually we can judge ourselves more harshly than others do. Can you think back to where this might be coming from? Were you made to feel like you had to be perfect in the past? How was it growing up? Did you feel criticized a lot? A lot of our core beliefs have to do with our past, especially things we experienced in childhood. This might be worth thinking about. The good news is that these beliefs can be challenged and reframed into more positive ones. Looking at ourself with kindness and grace instead of judgement can make a big difference. And even if we do something wrong? What is the worst that could happen. Mistakes make us human. Use them to learn and grow.
healthylistener
March 6th, 2021 6:48am
Sometimes depending on the environment we grew up in, the feelings that we have come from there. If you were guilted all of your life, then you may feel guilty for everything around you. It is helpful to find someone that you are comfortable talking with to change your thought pattern. It is also important to know that you are not a bad person for feeling the way that you do about things. Life just brings us different challenges and there is always someone out there who is willing to help. Just be sure that you feel safe in sharing, as once it is on the table, it is on the table.
Anonymous
March 11th, 2021 8:45pm
Thoughts like, “It’s just a matter of time before something else terrible happens. Bad things always happen to me,” become a barrier to positive thoughts and prevent you from focusing on good things in your life. Most times, the unfortunate things that happen in life are things that you have no control over, so wasting emotional energy on negative thoughts like, “Why me?!” or “What’s next?,” is a dead-end proposition that only results in more negative stinking thinking. A healthier approach is to simply acknowledge the bad things that have happened as negative events and turn your attention to what’s good in your life, like people who bring you joy or activities that create feelings of happiness, contentment, and gratitude. A note of caution: Be careful who you share your misery with. Some people will respond to your situation with negative comments like, “When it rains it really pours” or “Bad things come in threes so watch out, ” which just contribute to the negativity and add to your worried thoughts and feelings of anguish. So, be careful to only share your distress with people who will provide strength and positivity.
Anonymous
April 28th, 2021 2:21am
Your perspective is really important. We all make mistakes and we all tend to be really hard on ourselves. Very often we tend to look at the things that we are not good or fail in and that takes too much space in your life and in your brain. I really encourage you to change your perspective by looking at all the positive aspects in your life and see where you do make small things that are RIGHT. A good example would be everyday you make your bed or brush your teeth ,eat healthy ,work out . We all are programmed to NATURALLY look at the negative side of things because that way we ensure our survival. When our ancestors saw something dangerous like snakes, spiders or a predator we would see danger and that way we created in or brain a NEGATIVE feed loop. Now here is the interesting part when you replace your negative feed loop with a POSITIVE feed loop that’s when your perspective changes. It s not easy but it’s a really really powerful tool and very very rewarding
eLucae
June 3rd, 2021 8:12pm
This can be a form of overthinking. I understand feeling like you're doing everything wrong and that everyone is mad at you. Sometimes it may be you being insecure and if it is, find ways to calm down. Such as listening to music or reading a book. If its a person that is making you feel this way, talk to them. Make sure they know how you feel. Thinking like this is normal for people. It may be past trauma.
mellowmushroom0413
July 14th, 2021 7:34pm
This is most likely due to a lack of self-esteem. When you think and/or feel poorly about yourself, it will project onto everything you do. You'll feel like everyone doesn't like you, that nothing you do is good enough, etc. The reality is, you don't like yourself. Nothing you do is good enough for you. At the end of the day, feeling like everything you do is wrong is not actually a reflection of your abilities, intellect, etc. When you heal your relationship with yourself, it will be far easier to see your purpose and value in the world.
Anonymous
September 29th, 2021 7:56pm
It happens with everyone, it's normal sometimes coincidence makes you think like that, you can do better things have faith in yourself .you can do better with the slightest change in the approach and you can have mentors support , and talk to your family and friends whenever you feel that way , no one is perfect mistakes are bound to happen but what makes difference is how you pursue those mistakes and how well you can find good out of that wrong work or decisions helps you to to grow, you will make better with time so don't worry.
TheHelpfulNinja
January 5th, 2022 11:27am
Hey thanks for the question! Let's zoom into this question. Specifically let's look at "think" . It sounds like a sign of lack of self belief and maybe self confidence. Thinking is not knowing. Do you often lack trust in your own decision-making? Could you think of any causes of why you don't trust your own gut? Maybe everything so far has not turned out in your favour, and therefore for you must think everything is wrong? Perhaps outsiders, (friends or family members, work peers) often make comments on the things you do, or play down your achievements? Just a few things to think about which may help you discover the reason. Best wishes
neverendingHorizon72
January 19th, 2022 8:30am
Sometimes we can be our own worst critics. We seemingly know ourselves the best, yet treat ourselves the worst. When you're feeling that type of judgment coming on, try and take a step back and ask yourself is this realistic? Do I have a genuine reason to be doing so, or am I just being overcritical? Odds are, you will be able to take a step back and realize you have no reason to be judging yourself. This skill does take practice, so I would recommend trying to practice this positive mindset in small, low stake areas. I believe in you, and I promise it is worth trying!
ksnaf
January 28th, 2022 4:08am
Overlooking the small positive scorers of your life can often cause tunnel vision on the bad or “wrong” events. Enjoying the small wins is really important. Getting out of bed, looking forward to breakfast or school even though it’s not the most exciting thing in the world can really put the bad or wrong into perspective and get yourself in a confident mind set for the day moving forward and life in general. If you have a pessimistic outlook on decision you make then there’s no point in making them. Step back take a deep breathe and be confident with your decisions.
Anonymous
January 30th, 2022 9:54pm
I have a hard time dealing with constantly thinking that everything I do is wrong. It stems from my need to be perfect and harsh criticism received from my parents when I was younger. I was told that I couldn’t do anything right, I was nothing, and that no one would love me. It has been a long process to overcome this idea that nothing I do is ever good enough, but everyday it gets easier. I find that positive self talk, exercise, doing things I enjoy, and taking care of myself has really helped. Also, journaling and thinking about my ideals helps.
salmagaryhejez
March 4th, 2022 12:05am
Sometimes our self-confidence is weaker than usual because of the circumstances we are going through or because we always compare ourselves to others, which makes us feel that we are not satisfied with ourselves and that we are not enough or do not deserve what we have reached. We enter into a state of denial of our efforts and convince ourselves that we are failures when the truth may be the exact opposite. Everything you achieved was with great effort on your part. While you convince yourself that you have reached this point only by chance. Remember that there is no such thing as coincidence and that no matter how good there are people who are good at a thing, you can be superior at another, but you haven't discovered it yet. Remember that everyone is special in their own way and that you are always good and enough.