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Why do I feel depressed even when my life is going great?

285 Answers
Last Updated: 12/29/2021 at 5:19pm
Why do I feel depressed even when my life is going great?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Alex DS Ellis, MA, LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

Feeling depressed or anxious can be so overwhelming. I want to help you feel better and be able to enjoy life. You are not alone and you deserve emotional support.

Top Rated Answers
Heftyarjun
May 30th, 2020 5:02am
It generally happens when your true self is actually wanting to pursue another area subconsciously. So when you feel so, it's time to recognize what your inner self is wanting you to go for. But yet you are busy in focussing the outer world. For that to happen you need turn inward and spend some time daily. Do gudied meditations. Turn inward. When you start observing yourself gradually your true self opens up. Thereby you get clarity on how to come out of it. So if you keep on channelize your energies inward , the clarity will become a natural trait of you.
SarahR0SE
June 7th, 2020 3:10pm
Depression isn't always related to what's currently going on in our life. Depression can be caused by chemical inbalance and also past traumas and unresolved issues. Try not to be too hard on yourself, even if youre life is going OK, it's perfectly normal to get bouts of depression. If you are really struggling I would suggest going to a doctor or trained counsellor. Especially if your depression lasts for over 2 weeks and /or it is effecting your ability to cope in everyday life. You could try some mindfulness techniques when you are having down days as well as using 7 cups to chat. I hope this helps
Sugarlife24
June 18th, 2020 5:44am
Sometime even if people have eveything they had wished for they still feel depressed. I hope i never get to see people die because they never got a single person to share his or her thoughts. Most of people i fount here are like ok i'm dont with my Risponsblity by posting about an actor's death or just to talk about it 2 or 3 days and done. Only few among these or other who still have'nt reacted know who must attention it really needs. Except few Whenever we find a person getting emotional or needs time and attention we skip to listen that person. The only reason is we don't want to get involved with it. Guys if someone is tryin' talk to u about something emotional please talk because u need to understand that person have choosen u to know about it and expected your help ever if they say they dont need it. They might pretend to others thst they r happy but within they seek for someone's help. Its your moral duty to listen. Just by listening you can help that person it get out of an emotional breakdown. Help that person in best posible way. Life will always get u in a lot of problem and everyone of us face it, but thats not an issue. Issue is when u start to think that only u r facing it.
Anonymous
June 18th, 2020 10:13pm
This probably means that you are not completely over certain issues that you have been dealing with. It is important to not pretend that everything is okay but rather go over your feelings and understand why you are feeling this way. Perhaps you are still struggling with unresolved or supressed traumas that you have put on the side. Feeling depressed even when life is going great can indicate that you may be stuck somewhere from your past and have not yet fully gotten over it. Perhaps it has nothing to do with your past but you are simply aching for more achievement your life.
mentalhealthhelp2020
June 28th, 2020 12:36pm
Felling down is not being strange, as human being we shouldn’t be harsh on ourselves felling bad and asking for help is totally okay because people are here to help you understand what is going wrong. Just having someone listen to you can be a huge step forward. Life is really stressful just in general, some of us are pressured to look, fell, or be a certain way. This makes us think that our life is going well but sometimes when your mental health is down it takes more than life’ going great to overcome it. First step is to talk about it.
lailallama
July 1st, 2020 1:20am
Depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain, which unfortunately means that feeling depressed can happen regardless of whether or not there are additional external triggers for it. It doesn't mean you aren't grateful for the good things about life, or that you're just being overdramatic, it is a very real condition, and its symptoms can be improved with therapy and/or medication. If you are experiencing chronic depression, please seek help and know that things can and will get better. You may not feel great now but you won't feel this way forever. You don't have to struggle alone, you are loved and cared about.
ssruthi12
July 1st, 2020 2:44pm
This is a totally valid feeling that many people have. I've had a very insightful conversation with a friend about this that I will share- what we were talking about was that there are two states of happiness- there is your external happiness, which is defined by what you do and who you are around, and there is your internal happiness/ sense of peace, which is defined by how you feel about yourself and how you are doing. When "life is going great", you are probably referring to your external state of being, whether it be academically, socially, etc. It is completely valid to be surrounded by great people and progress really well on the outside, but still be depressed or lost on the inside. The external state can not completely fulfill or achieve stable happiness. Your sense of self also needs to be in sync with this, and at times, may even matter more than whatever it is you do on the outside. Achieving a state of peace with yourself, accepting who you are, and acknowledging where you are in life can help with offsetting the depressed feelings. It is very important to balance your internal and external states of being.
globalRainfall50
July 2nd, 2020 4:12am
Sometimes we think we know what will make us happy, but when we get it we're not as happy as we think we would be. So in our minds we have everything we want, but in reality there's still something missing. It's important to examine yourself and make sure that aside from just external circumstances, your internal frame of mind is in the right place. Practicing meditation, praying if you believe in a higher power, trying to live your values, and helping people are all things that can help you find meaning in your life. I hope this is a helpful answer.
Earthling22
July 5th, 2020 2:57pm
When you feel depressed despite having an active life, it is important to ask yourself if you are satisfied with your life. Is it that your life is going great by the standards of the people that surround you or is it geniunly great for you but you feel like something or someone that makes you feel happy is missing? To see what is causing your feelings evaluating the things you are happy about and those that your not happy about may help you arrive at the cause. Make sure that your life is going great by your standards and expectations, that is the first step of being able to enjoy your present
Anonymous
July 8th, 2020 12:42pm
Depression is incredibly unremitting in that it does not discriminate between people's situations in life. Though it can be triggered environmentally, it's the result of a chemical imbalance that can leave you feeling incredibly down regardless of your circumstance. We can start feeling frustrated or even invalidated for how we're feeling because we don't believe we have a 'reason' to be depressed. But this is not how depression works. This is why seeking out professional help if you're feeling depressed is so important - professional resources can help us to process these feelings, and point us towards ways to improve our mental health that acknowledge that we don't have to be having an obviously hard time to be struggling.
Smilingfuture
July 16th, 2020 9:10am
Depression, as much as i know, can be consequential cause , due to an unfilled desire, higher expectations on oneself or others, factors that are beyond my control but have an unwanted influence on me, etc. So if a person is feeling depressed, even if everything is going well, or if he feels that his life is going great, then he/she must be experiencing a sense of lack of motivation, lack of challenges that could be potentially trigger to make life exciting and keep them on an edge and keep striving for higher goals, that would keep their serotonin levels to be always active and keep pumping their hormones for continues successes. When such a state arises, certain individuals feel depressed and remain low in vibrational energies. Nothing to panic about. Just look around for New Challenges. Cheers!!.
Anonymous
July 23rd, 2020 6:48pm
I'm so glad that you see that your life is going well and that everything is alright. But remember that it's okay to feel down or depressed. Feeling negative emotions is natural for everyone, not matter who you are. Just because you're life is going well doesn't mean it invalidates the negative emotions or experiences you go through. It's better for you to address and confront how you feel, rather than holding in your emotions. In the end, doing these things will allow you to grow as a person and make you an overall happier person. So reach out to whoever you need, whether it be someone on 7 Cups, friends, family, or a therapist.
Anonymous
August 16th, 2020 6:58pm
There is no right answer. I am personally struggling with this question as well and there's simply no right answer. Depression is a recurring mental obstacle that will pop up whether you're doing the best you've ever been or if you're at an all time low. Finding good coping mechansims and people in your life who you can confide in during these difficult times are both extremely important and helpful. Having people who you can depend on to support you is crucial. Focusing on all of the positive things in your life and trying to increase the number of positive activities you engage in can also help.
redemptionblue17
August 28th, 2020 7:04am
Before we're heading, we might want to remember that each person is unique. There are many ways underlying the circumstances. We might want to listen what your values towards yourself, the people around you, and the world. Now to think, is it aligned? Our life is dynamic, we're adapted to what we're in. the same with your value, it can be changed over the time. There's one called hedonic treadmill theory. Say you're having a feast of fancy food, you love it and eat a lot. but what will the next food taste like? it might not taste delicious the same as the first two foods, or worse, you might retch. What looks fancy might look tedious also if being exposed everyday. That might be a sign you consider to have something new. Another example, if you have the fancy feast but something is missing (maybe your urge craves for sushi, or mother's cooking, yet none of it). Life might be going great, but it might be judged by the 'standard' exposed by the world. you're stirred to pursue it over and over, but only to find miserable over yourself either you attain or not. Depressed is a serious sign of prolonged stress, suicidal thoughts, heave the problems alone. None of words can accurately describe how you are. But if you're able to address specifically what you feel, what makes you feel so, what influence it, it will help much to discover about yourself
Keedawnlee
August 28th, 2020 8:07pm
I feel like that because i dont believe it is true or something soon is about to happen to completely throw my life into shambles i feel depressed because i dont feel like i deserve it i feel depressed because no one loves me for me i feel depressed because it all is an illusion or a temporary break from the horribleness i have become accustomed to and i know this break will be short and the fall back to my grim reality is going to hurt that much more if i allow myself to feel anything but depression and suffering
calmingOcean6858
September 12th, 2020 3:33am
Well, sometimes my life is going great on the outside but not necessarily on the inside. For example, maybe I have a job, and some friends, and a girlfriend. And so from the outside it looks like my life is going great. But maybe there are also a lot of subtle things that are bringing down my mood and causing me to feel depressed. For example, maybe I am wishing I had a better education regarding a difficult topic. Or wishing I had a higher paying job in a more exclusive role. Or maybe I am frustrated about my present and my future, worrying about something that hasn't happened yet.
Anonymous
September 26th, 2020 6:01am
This is always a hard thing to experience, right? In some ways, we feel like we need a reason to feel the way we do, so we can feel confused when things are going one way in our lives yet we feel another way. If you have a long history of trauma or mental health difficulties, it can take a long time for your feelings to fit your situation. It's like our brain spends time playing "catch up," in a sense. If you don't have a history of trauma, that's okay, too. At the end of the day, it's okay to feel the way you do.
Anonymous
October 8th, 2020 4:41am
That's the nature of depression. Even when things are going amazing and no one can suspect a thing, depression makes you feel down for no reason. You can't even pinpoint where the feeling of sadness is coming from but it's just there and it's a nagging feeling that doesn't leave. Sometimes depression has just been with the sufferer for so long that they can't picture feeling happy anymore so it just sticks with them. It's easier said than done but focus on the positives in your life to uplift yourself. Wishing you luck- everything is going to be alright.
Anonymous
October 14th, 2020 3:42pm
Sorry that you feel that way but there's days that even though everything is going good and you're happy as ever, depression will sneak up and bite you every time. Depression is like a battleship you never know when it's going to start fighting with you. It's a hard thing to overcome. It messes with your mental status because you can't figure out why you're depressed even though everything is going good and you're happy. So every time you rack your brain to figure out why, Because then you start unlocking memories that you have locked up in your brain vault and then you start worrying next thing you know you're having panic attacks.
Evertonest
October 16th, 2020 2:35am
There are many reasons why we might feel depressed. There may be lifestyle habits making you feel depressed e.g. not being active enough, eating unhealthy foods, not getting enough sleep. You may also be viewing events around you through a negative filter. For example, when a friend gives you a genuine compliment, you think to yourself "That's not true. He's saying that to be nice. I'm a loser." Or, when you receive an award, you think to yourself "I didn't deserve that. I was just lucky." These negative thoughts can appear automatically and can be hard to detect, and it makes sense these thoughts make you feel depressed. Happiness is a rollercoaster - we cannot be 100% happy all the time. There will be days where we feel depressed even for no apparent reason too.
Journey2Healing
October 16th, 2020 5:02am
There is a common misconception that depression only comes up when things are falling apart around us or our lives are not going well. Sometimes, depression is not about if our lives are going great or not. Often times, our lives can be just fine, but we could still have underlying emotions or struggles or internal distress causing our depression. Even so, there are often triggers we are unaware of that can contribute too. So, we can certainly feel depressed even if things are not falling apart around us. We can feel depressed at any point or stage or time in our lives.
joyousFreedom1580
October 21st, 2020 4:16am
I feel that even though life is going great now, I must be missing something, or my emotions will soon level out and things will be bad again. Sometimes even when things are amazing, I am still not living up to my full potential, I'm not doing all I could do. I'm not perfect, so the 'great' life I have right now is not good enough or only an illusion. Similarly, I feel as though my perfectionism prevents me from ever truly reaching a point in my life when it's going great. There is always more I could be doing, there is always an area of my life that is not as perfect as it could be. There are always flaws, so there is always reasons to be depressed. But you can't get hung up on that, you can't focus on all the things you're not perfect at because you'll end up too terrified of moving or so tired it's not worth it anyway.
bubblegumPuppy68
October 25th, 2020 5:43pm
The reason that you may still be experiencing depression even though things are great is because, somewhere in your mind there is something that happened to make you feel depressed and the mind or brain takes a mental snapshot of that instance and it becomes a program that the brain uses to keep you safe even though there may be no threat. It does not recognize the fact that you are in no need to be protected. That snapshot that the brain takes then becomes stored in the body and as the book entitled says. THE BODY KEEPS THE SCORE. What ever the event was it was an unpleasant experience to your mind and the emotion connected did not get process so that it could be filed away in its proper file. Therefore causing a stuck response to the brain. The brain is the organ that tells the rest of the body how function. So the body reacts to the instructions of the brain. The body is unaware that it is a faulty program. The only way to find out what the belief was, is to go back in your life and begin to dig into where the first experience of feeling depressed first showed up. Try to remember all the circumstances that surrounded that time. See who was involved with you feeling that way. Then you canbegan to remove that program and set up one that works for you. It will take much practice to get the brain to reset to a new program because it likes to stay in its comfort zone doing and acting out what is familiar. Practice makes perfect.
janedoe73
November 11th, 2020 6:03pm
Even though our life could be going great, our mind is still the environment in which we live in. Exterior aspects could help you feel better, but unless you manage to deal with everything inside your mind, it will be difficult to feel as great as your life is. Think of your mind and your thoughts as an aspect that is equal or even bigger than the exterior aspects. When you start treating it like on, you see that it is the most important part of your life. If you feel as if there is nothing to solve in your mind, you might be missing something that is laying on some deeper level. Explore those possibilities.
Anonymous
November 18th, 2020 5:38am
I believe that everyone requires certain things to be happy, and if you’re missing some of those things you’ll likely be unhappy. For instance, if you’re passionate about drawing but don’t have time to draw because you’re too busy with things like a successful career, getting good grades, participating in extracurriculars, or volunteering, you may feel like your lifestyle, while appearing great to outside people, doesn’t match your requirements because it lacks something you’re passionate about - drawing. You may feel like something is still missing from your life, whether it’s hobbies, deep personal connections with other people, or experiences you never got to try.
specialMelody96
November 20th, 2020 9:16pm
One of the challenging things about depression is that it is completely indiscriminate. It can happen to any person, any time, regardless of your life circumstance. Often, depression is not caused by external factors at all, it can simply be as a result of the chemicals in your brain. Sometimes, the fact that you're feeling depressed despite your life going great, can cause feelings of guilt, and can make you feel like you should be more 'grateful'. I just want to reassure you that your feelings are totally valid, and you have nothing to feel guilty about. Please don't let these feelings prevent you from reaching out and getting the support you need.
Anonymous
November 28th, 2020 2:29am
There could be numerous reasons. The Rx pushers will always imply a serotonin imbalance, but the most probable is living long period(s) of one's life rife with stress and sorrow, and at such extremes that one conditions themselves to anticipate stress and sorrow, even when things are otherwise ... going great. The inability to breakaway from this pattern of thinking also has many causes, but the most prevalent is living in a cold or unsupportive environment where one is not allowed to express themselves honestly and naturally. Perhaps while growing up, attending school, or in a marriage or relationship. The remedial question should thus be, "Why SHOULD I feel depressed even when my life is going great?"
Sowmo0509
December 3rd, 2020 5:29pm
I just get scared about my future, and I've been sadly constantly so it's hard to accept the fact that everything is going great, which shouldn't be. It's like been depressed for so long so it's just got melted inside me. That's not a problem but it's sad cause whenever in a happy moment or something, I always have to remind myself the fact that I might get sad or something worse gonna happen soon, so I let myself get back into sad mood again so nothing sad could feel like that sudden sadness to me in a happy moment.
lizzy2992
December 23rd, 2020 9:58pm
I cannot give an exact answer without knowing your exact situation. There are many causes for depression even if you have a great life; depression is caused by many things such as stress, loneliness, chemical imbalances, hormones, genetics, the list goes on and on. Sometimes we don't fully realize something really bothers us until we take the time to stop and think about everything going on in our lives. Are we truly getting what we need from all aspects of life? Are we truly gratified? Do we just feel like life is going great when it isn't going that great? Answering those questions often helps us realize why we feel the way we feel, and it can help us to figure out how to move past it.
shallo
January 9th, 2021 9:40pm
Depression can be brought on by a multitude of factors, individually or all mixed up. It can be brought on by trauma (past or current), loss or grief, situationally (change(s)) in life), or other external triggers. If external triggers aren't easy to identify, the depression may simply be the byproduct of an internal imbalance in your brain. If you think this may be the case, speaking with a licensed therapist or health care professional who can help you diagnose the issue could be helpful. There are many paths to mental health management (peer support, diet & exercise, therapy, medication, education, etc) and through to recovery. Just remember, there is nothing wrong with you, and it takes a lot of courage, strength, and resilience to stand up, take ownership, and ask for help. I am rooting for you, and cheering you on!