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Why do I feel like a failure?

93 Answers
Last Updated: 11/12/2019 at 12:37am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Courtney Cline, MS in Psychology and MS in criminal Justice

Counselor

I have 15 years exeperience in working with clients suffering from depression and substance abuse. I have worked with children and adults and believe in a holistic view.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
March 5th, 2016 4:20am
I feel like a failure because I was taught I was a failure. It is simply a learnt belief. It is not truth.
L4ur3n
April 7th, 2016 10:45am
We feel like failures when our actions do not align with our personal values. I value compassion; if I were not there for someone who needed me, I would likely feel that I'd failed because being compassionate is one of the most important things to me.
CarlyNicole
April 9th, 2016 1:43pm
This is suppose to be based on my own personal experience, so why do I feel like a failure? I feel like a failure when I cannot help the members and I disappoint them. I genuinely care for my members.
Anonymous
April 20th, 2016 11:48am
I always judge myself and it makes me feel like I have to succeed every time when I can't. That's why.
kindSong20
June 13th, 2016 9:07pm
because when we do not do something which we think we should or we demand too much from ourselves and get dissapointed so we think we are a failure
heretohelp356
August 11th, 2015 6:43pm
maybe you didn't accomplish something you thought you should have. sometimes a hard time can result.
Sunray2415
January 14th, 2016 4:38am
Because maybe bad things are happening in your life and you don't know how to deal with those things , or you don't like yourself enough and have insecurities or you put too much on your shoulders , you have to remember that you are human and it's more than ok to make mistake , it's what makes you learn
Truckerwife08
January 21st, 2016 1:07am
Youre feeling down or a series of events that havent been good have made you feel that way or depression can make you feel like youre a failure. You arent tho. Stay positive
Anonymous
January 22nd, 2016 4:54am
It's easy to feel like a failure every time we mess up. It happens to everyone, don't worry. Something might have happened and you might not have done the right thing, but that doesn't make you a failure!
Anonymous
January 28th, 2016 7:11am
Mostly people tend to feel like that when they have had a failure or when people told them so... its easy to start thinking of yourself like that when that happens.
Anonymous
February 6th, 2016 2:25am
When we fail at acomplishing the goals we set ourselves to achieve, we might sense the feeling of being a failure. But mistakes and fails are only events we can learn from and next time we could achieve what we set for.
Anonymous
February 12th, 2016 8:09am
We are all failures in life at some point and we shouldn't feel useless just because. Stand your ground, learn from your mistakes. More life no pain no gain! ;)
Yourfairygodbro
February 13th, 2016 7:46am
When we don't know how to value ourselves, we are tempted easily to underestimate ourselves. You haven't worked on building your confidence enough, thoughtcatalog.com is a good source to help with this, so are Ted talks on YouTube.
CaringJoy
February 19th, 2016 2:10am
You're probably being overly critical of yourself and comparing yourself to others. We're all a work in progress and no one is perfect. Building up our self worth allows to see that we're not a failure after all and allows us to embrace our qualities and accomplishments.
Willofheart
February 19th, 2016 8:56am
There's nothing wrong with failing, failing is just an eye opening experience that you need to embrace and learn from, everyone fails at something or the other. The reason why one feels like a failure is because one has expectations which have not been met, they may be others' expectations or their own
Anonymous
February 20th, 2016 9:32am
not being able to achieve my own personal goals, not being able to help people solve their problems entirely, nt being able to fulfil own and others' promises
Anonymous
February 21st, 2016 11:59am
its just a feeling this doesn't mean that you are. a lot of people will feel like this at some point
Anonymous
February 21st, 2016 9:56pm
repeated experiences of failing may wrongly convince you that you are a failure, don't ever give up and keep trying, there is no impossible, you can do it!
Anonymous
February 24th, 2016 5:05am
I'm sorry that you feel that way! We all feel like failures sometimes, whether the sentiment is justified or not. Failing is part of human nature, but so is getting back up after you've failed and trying again until you've succeeded! I believe in you.
proudRabbit95
February 24th, 2016 5:27pm
Sometimes it is hard to see your own value. It can take just a small mistake and you suddenly feel completely miserable. Just because you are feeling like a failure doesn't mean you are one however, try to focus on everything you are good at, because I promise you that there are a lot of things even though you might not be able to see them right now.
PacificSunrise
February 24th, 2016 7:46pm
When we think in terms of a standard like measuring ourselves against something, we often feel like we are not enough. Another thing is that we sometimes have the concept of being perfect and that anything that don't go well will destroy the idea of our perfection. With all these beliefs, we need to shift them so that they work for us. We need to see that nothing is perfect and that anything can fail. We also need to see that we are better than others at some things and not at other things. So when we begin to pay attention to our thoughts, our feelings began to change along with it.
Anonymous
February 25th, 2016 2:12pm
Often times, in life, we feel like we like we have failed. Whether it's because we think we have made a mistake, or we just feel down, we feel like a "failure". Something has probably happened that has triggered that feeling. Just know, you aren't a failure. Whatever triggered it was just a bump in the road. You still have a long life ahead of you. Don't label yourself as a failure. Learn what makes you feel that way and try to fix it.
Luftmensch4
February 25th, 2016 4:43pm
because they always say it, believe in yourself.. if you want you can. show them.. Failure is not the opposite of success, it's part of success.
colorfulSummer66
February 27th, 2016 12:55am
When things aren't going your way, especially a lot of things at once, it's easy to feel like a failure.
TheHummingbirdListener
February 28th, 2016 2:17am
We can often feel like a failure when our expectations of ourselves are too high. Being compassionate with ourselves and being realistic in what we can achieve allows us to grow and let go of our feelings of failure, and instead focus on the positives.
Anonymous
February 28th, 2016 4:08am
Feelings of failure do not directly stem from your own actions, but rather from comparing yourself to other people or trying to live up to impossible standards.
Jollygal17
March 2nd, 2016 1:09am
A lot of people compare their successes to other people's and somehow even their small success seems diminished.
Anonymous
March 3rd, 2016 2:50pm
We all feel that way sometimes in our lives. We are doing this life thing for the first time and we don't have the faintest idea of how to do it right. I have this feeling recurring all throughout my life when things don't work out like I think they should. I have learned, however, that failure is an event, not a person. I also realised that only through failure is wisdom possible. It's your personal pathway to success.
Anonymous
March 3rd, 2016 2:54pm
Other people always tell you what's wrong with you. For example, you're always late, you study bad, you don't have much money etc. And you're trying to fix yourself. But be better person doesn't necessarily mean to change everything and hate yourself for who you are. Maybe now you can feel like a failure, but that's just a sign for you to try be more confident, don't be afraid to be yourself and start to think positive.
Anonymous
March 3rd, 2016 7:19pm
You might be under a stress and a lot of pressure. It's normal to feel like this when people expect too much from you