How do I stop thinking about the night when the tragedy happened?
Last Updated: 11/02/2020 at 3:13am
Paola Giordani, Psychoanalyst
I have helped and am helping people cope with loss, divorce, anguish and parenting. Depression is also a major issue that comes up.
Top Rated Answers
The easiest thing to do is distract yourself. And harming yourself is not in the question. Listen to music, work out, watch tv, talk to people. These will keep you from thinking about your past and ultimately improve your mood.
When tragedy occurs, it's definitely difficult to stop thinking about it. Sometimes it can overwhelm us, and we think about it everyday. Although you cannot erase it from your memory, you can stop thinking about it less and less over time. Our Traumatic Experiences guide encourages you to write an "Impact Statement", delineating how the trauma/tragedy has affected you, whether you feel guilt, and how your beliefs and behaviours might have changed. This helps identify "stuck points", which may be contributing to thinking about the traumatic experience/tragedy. Sorting through your difficulties that are a result of the tragedy can help your mind find some release, and ultimately help you stop thinking about that night.
You heal the trauma. You have to work through it. That's the only way you will stop thinking about it. However if it's a death, you may never stop thinking about it all together, it's just something we have to live with. and that's perfectly normal.
For me, listening to edm music helps me not think about things I don't want to think about. I also draw and do other things I enjoy to help me feel better.
You cannot force your mind to 'not think' but you can train yourself not to get stuck on bad thoughts by adopting mindful tools.
Allow yourself the time to grieve, mourn, and process everything....everything takes time. Then allow yourself to let go - while you will always remember, you can allow yourself to let go of the pain.
Everyone responds to tragedy differently. Every emotion is valid. Sometimes it is difficult to push through the emotions that come from tragedy but it is up to you to find what works best for you. Everyone’s heart heals differently and that is completely ok. Sometimes negative feelings can help you to see the positive light at the end of the tunnel. However, we all know that positive thoughts are easier to deal with, and sometimes dealing with those negative thoughts help us to grow stronger in the face of tragedy. As long as you are taking baby steps forward you are moving in the right direction.
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