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Is it normal for me to feel so ashamed, confused and lost after a traumatic event?

13 Answers
Last Updated: 01/29/2022 at 11:51am
1 Tip to Feel Better
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Andrea Tuck, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I tackle and discuss a multitude of social and emotional health issues. I have a belief that through empowerment and non-judgmental support clients' can thrive.

Top Rated Answers
edufresne
January 21st, 2015 11:52pm
It is completely normal. A rush of emotions pour in after a traumatic event, no matter what the event may have been.
Peaceatlast
February 18th, 2015 7:44pm
Yes in my experience it is totally normally to feel ashamed, confused and lost after a traumatic event. Your mind and soul goes through stages of these emotions back and forth. Healing takes time after a trauma and the best way to deal with your emotions is talking about them. Hope this helps
Anonymous
April 9th, 2015 3:04pm
In my own perspective, the answer is yes. It is normal for us to feel ashamed, confused, and lost after a traumatic event. BUT it isn't normal if you're going to stay like that forever. We must learn how to stand up and fight, after.
Anonymous
April 24th, 2015 4:34pm
Yes it is, a traumatic event usually shakes ones life so it's only normal to feel ashamed, confused and lost after that. if it helps, try talking to someone about it. They might be able to help you by either listening to you or help you analyze the event to help you make better sense of what has happened.
ashesunbroken
May 28th, 2015 4:40am
Traumatic events can cause a variety of emotions. What you are experiencing sounds normal. Have you talked to anyone about what happened?
tobetheuniverse
June 29th, 2015 8:32am
Absolutely. Trauma pushes you quite far out of your comfort zone in most cases, and we are usually ill-prepared for traumatic events as they come without warning. These events require you to take time to heal, and that is a long journey that is different for everyone. There is no such thing as an invalid emotion, always keep that in mind.
Anonymous
July 13th, 2015 7:03pm
Of course it is, its perfectly normal. Everyone deals with things in their own way. its a difficult time for you you will learn to slowly let all these feelings fade away.
SoftElocution
July 28th, 2015 11:18pm
Yes, I think it's completely normal to feel any of those things after a traumatic event. Sometimes I imagine I'm on a boat and when the boat rocks suddenly, I reach for a railing to steady myself. My heart races and I look around trying to find what made the boat rock. I think this is kind of similar in that when something shakes your life like a traumatic event, it's natural to be scared, shaken, confused, or lost. It's your body's way to finding its balance. Sometimes, when the boat rocks suddenly, some people scramble and panic, frantically running around the deck. Others will stop, reach for a railing, and find their balance again. The boat will inevitably shake, and when it does we can scream and run around the deck, or we can reach for a railing but, either way it's okay to be scared.
Anonymous
September 22nd, 2015 6:53pm
We can feel many emotions after a traumatic event, all of those emotions are perfectly natural and you should allow yourself to feel them without worrying, they will pass in time.
Anonymous
February 21st, 2016 5:38am
Absolutely. Trauma brings on many complex elements and emotions, and it can be a very difficult time for the victim. It's important for you to be able to seek help, talk it out and try to understand or manage these emotions. Your well being comes first, so don't feel ashamed to ask for help.
SoulHealing
August 14th, 2017 8:42am
It depends on how shocking has been the event for you. Some people are more sensitive than others when it comes to unpleasant events
Anonymous
April 24th, 2018 12:43am
It is normal for you to feel so ashamed and lost after traumatic event because you thought about it for a long time to where you're wondering if you try something new it'll result in the same situation and you don't know where to go.
glasseyedgrace
January 29th, 2022 11:51am
Yes, it is normal, and you deserve to have those feelings validated. It is actually very healthy to feel the feelings, instead of pushing them down only for them to come back again later. Personally, I can relate to what you are feeling. I felt ashamed because I stayed in the relationship for so long and I felt confused, because when my abuser killed himself, I was literally at conflict with myself. I may sound harsh when I say this, but it is real , when my abuser {husband) committed suicide, I found myself dealing with a rollercoaster of emotions, from complete despair and sadness to almost feeling a sense of relief knowing he was gone and would never be able to conrol me or hurt me again. At the same time, however, I was heartbroken, for my kids mostly, being cheated and robbed of a normal happy childhood and having a father. Lost is putting how I felt mildly. Even now, 8 years after his death, I am still trying to process it all and all of these emotions still linger. So to answer your question, yes, it is normal to feel ashamed, confused and lost after trauma. Whatever emotions you are feeling are what is normal for you, there is no right or wrong way to feel, or any specific amount of time. The one thing that is for certain is that talking, writing, any outlet you can find to help lighten the weight of carrying all of this on your own is always vital to behinning to heal