Why can't I just love and/or accept myself?
Last Updated: 02/14/2017 at 7:27pm
Meredith Seltzer, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
The therapeutic relationship can assist you in accomplishing your goals and clarifying your wants and needs. As a skilled counselor and therapist I will help you along the way
Top Rated Answers
You can. You are a beautiful human being, you are alive and you are getting the chance to enjoy this world. You are beautiful, believe it. We are here for you.
We always tend to compare ourselves to others. We think that others are better than us, we do not see the potential in ourselves, but always undermine ourselves. Is it because we can see others and their good actions, but we cannot see and experience what we do to contribute to the world? Media puts the wrong emphasis on young people, it makes teenagers have a negative sense of their body image, making them think that they are not perfect enough. Culture and upbringing style can have the same effect too, being compared so often to others' children, being constantly told that we are not trying our best enough? Maybe all these thoughts have been imprinted in our minds since we were very young, and they are now just hard core beliefs that are hard to change as we grow older...
Self love is so important! I think what makes a key difference is realizing when you are talking bad about yourself, and for every bad comment, say one or two good things about yourself! For example, I used to hate my thighs, but I realize they are the reason I am able to run for miles and walk everywhere I need to go. I used to hate how I looked but I have now embraced my curls and freckles and brown eyes. I mean there are always things we are going to want to change- but by focusing on your good qualities, and making an effort to point them out to yourself multiple times in the day you will begin to love yourself and accept yourself more! Focus on your strengths xx
It's hard to completely find yourself at ease in your own skin, because sometimes you feel worthless and as if you haven't achieved anything. However, if you sat down for 15 minutes and listed good things you've done every day or every week, you'll soon see you're the hero the world waits for. Remember that old lady you helped with her shopping? Remember that frowning man you smiled at as you walked past? You've helped them all in your own special way. Loving and accepting yourself comes from within, and if you listen and realise all the little things you do, it helps to find that acceptance.
Coming to terms with who we are is very difficult, especially when we've struggled with illness or mental health concerns. Not being able to accept yourself now does not, in any way, mean that you won't be able to down the road.
You can't just love and accept yourself, because nobody has ever taught you to. Well, I am talking about myself, actually. I don't even know what it is like, to love or accept myself.
There can be many reasons for that. Maybe you have not been loved/accepted by people surrounding you and at one point you start to believe those people's words. A lie repeated long enough becomes the truth. It is not your fault. It is a natural reaction.
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