Why don't I see the same image in the mirror that others see of me?
Last Updated: 04/10/2017 at 11:10pm
Rory Boutilier, Registered Professional Counsellor
I use a human-centered approach to help you reach your goals. You are the expert on you! Particular areas: life changes, decision-making, men's issues.
Top Rated Answers
When you look in the mirror, you see all the negative things. You see acne, wrinkles, dark circles, etc. And it is because you are used to looking at yourself over and over again. So you see all the 'imperfections'. When others look at you they see the perfects parts about you first. They see your eyes, smile, style, and all the positive things about you. Its because they don't look at you the same amount as when you look at yourself. Also, everyday things change. So you see everything that changes about you. From growing up, to hair length, to how your face changes. Next time you look in the mirror, try and focus on what you like about yourself. I know that they are present but you just haven't been able to see them.
Because like most people, new is exciting. When someone experiences too much of anything, the sameness begins to overwhelm them. I tend to think that the only reason why people get tired/upset by their own reflection, is because they've seen it too often to actually embrace and love it.
After struggling with years of eating disorders, I still couldn't see myself the way others did. I felt as though I was a fat, worthless blob that nobody cared about, when in fact many people were very concerned about my low weight. They say that familiarity breeds contempt, and we know ourselves better than we know anyone else because we are constantly with ourselves. I believe that what starts out as a normal relationship with ourselves can lead to us noticing our flaws, finding annoying habits we have, and overall hating ourselves. We see a different person that others see.
Body dysmorphia is a disorder where your view of your physical body isn't the same as what you actually look like.
Because your seeing the negatives. Look around the room for all the red coloured things then without looking again tell me how many blue things there were in the room? You wont be able to list as many because you were so focused on the red. Look at the blue because thats what your peers are doing, their looking at the blue in you.
Either 1) too much self-confidence or 2) too little self-confidence. If you struggle with too little self-confidence, then try to talk to others about what they think of you. Other people's opinions are often good for a little ego boost. If you struggle with too much self-confidence, well then...you aren't the center of the universe.
We are our hardest critics!!! We point out what we think are flaws in ourselves when truly sometimes we look so much we start to create non existint flaws both externaly and internaly. We are all individualy beautiful and important in our own way! Sometimes its just difficult to see the good in ourselves in a mirror because we strive to be our best and if we saw perfection through a mirror we wouldnt have any thing to help ourselves grow!
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