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How can I get my parents to listen to me?

19 Answers
Last Updated: 09/08/2020 at 8:46pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lisa Groesz, PhD


With evidenced based therapies, we find the root of the problem together to implement solutions. We all face crises, transitions, or disorders at some time.

Top Rated Answers
February 17th, 2020 11:26am
Sit them down and tell them that you have something to discuss with them, they may refuse, but be firm and mature with them, show them that you have grown up and can take responsibility. Yeah it may be embarassing but your parents will still see you as their baby, so you just have to make them see that you are not anymore, be patient with them and allow them to give their opinions, just nod and be mature and understanding, and they should show you the same respect back.
May 21st, 2015 10:49pm
If you have not tried this yet - instead of opening the conversation with the topic you want to discuss, start by expressing that you have something on your mind that you'd like to talk to them about; and that it's important to you that they listen and try to understand. Sometimes, people are not aware of their unfriendly or hurtful reactions, and gently bringing their awareness to this can be all that is needed.
September 5th, 2015 6:59pm
I will try to explain my parents and if they don't listen then I will hear then and then I will tell them my point of view.
November 9th, 2015 3:25pm
Sometimes it is hard when we feel like we are not being listened too. It starts with building trust and talking about these feelings with our parents. Expressing our concern that we feel like we need to know that someone is engaged and understanding what we are saying. The trust is built through these conversations. If it does not improve immediately, it is okay. The commitment to building a trusting relationship through communication takes time, but the building towards the goal is a process that must be built each day,
November 12th, 2015 8:28pm
Sometimes parents feel that they are the sole decision makers in the house but you have to let them know that you are a knowledgeable person too who has feelings. Ask to have a family meeting once a week or so and sit them down and act like an adult you deserve to be treated like. People mature at different rates and parents sometimes need to be shown that you can make decisions too. Communication is key in any type of relationship. Give them a reason to show that they can trust you.
February 23rd, 2016 4:46am
Sitting down seriously with your parents can help them to listen to you. Telling them that you have something to get off your chest, or saying there is something that's been bothering you recently. are good starters. Remain calm and serious, and plan out what you want to say before you begin.
April 25th, 2016 3:05am
Sit them down and ask them to listen to you and what you have to say.
July 25th, 2016 3:36pm
Show your parents that you can listen to them as well as you would like them to listen to you, form an open communication.
September 26th, 2016 11:18am
The first thing is learning their respect. Have open heart conversations and let them know how you feel without assuming they understand anything (more like dealing with a new friend). When they hear your side of the story and if you also make a proposal that benefits them, they would be inclined to listen to you.
October 10th, 2016 4:35pm
You have to let them know how you feel. Try to reach out to them when they are not busy. Also, never ever back down.
October 10th, 2016 8:56pm
If you want your parents to listen to you, you need to connect with them on their level. Sit them down, so that you can make sure you have 100% of their attention. If they are distracted or distant, do not push them into talking with you, just leave it for another time. Try and make sure you arrange the time beforehand and try not to give them 5 minutes notice. When you have them sat down and ready, make sure you take a seat so you are facing them. Maintain eye contact. Tell them calmly what you wanted to say. Don't shout or sound angry. After you have finished, let them ask questions and maintain the same technique.
October 24th, 2016 5:33pm
you can try to see their point of view: they miss those years and should show them that you are there
November 8th, 2016 7:18am
Sit them down and let them know that you need to talk to them about something that is on your mind. Free them from any distractions to insure that they are fully focused on you and the task at hand.
February 28th, 2017 1:01am
You feel your parents aren't hearing what you're saying and this hurts you. Try to be calm, honest, and open-minded when you discuss this listening issue and any other personal issues with them when they have a moment to sit down and speak with you. Say something like, "I really need your help. Can we go sit and talk?" Before the talk, think of a list of reasons why you feel they aren't listening to you: be as specific as possible. For example, "I feel you aren't listening when you respond with 'yeah yeah yeah' and wave your hand," or "I feel you aren't listening because you immediately rush to solutions when sometimes I have more to say," or "I feel you aren't listening when you call me names." Before the talk, think of a list of ways they could show they are listening better - maybe they don't know how to be a good listener for you! Examples are, "It would help me know you're listening if you summarize what I've just told you," or "It would help me know you're listening if you just agree that I am feeling these things or going through this situation without offering help," or "It would show me you are listening if you give me hugs more often" or "It would show you are listening if you followup with me on my issues more often." Think of some compromises before the talk that show you are willing to be open-minded. Examples are "I promise to try to be more clear if you promise to show you're listening better." &c. Good luck!
August 22nd, 2017 11:48pm
Show them that you are a responsible and respectable mature young adult by behaving in an open and loving manner. Parents want to know they have taught/raised their children right and will act appropriately regardless of if they get what they want.
September 25th, 2017 11:11pm
Communicating with parents can be really hard, partly because they can think they know more than you because they have had more life experiences. Every person is different and have different needs. At the end of the day, your parents love you and want what is best for you. Approaching them with a potential solution and asking for their advice is a great way to start. Showing that you care about their opinion will make them more likely to listen to yours.
February 6th, 2018 1:16am
Tell him how serious this is. And show them how much it matters to you. And sit them down and explain whatever you have to.
February 13th, 2018 5:25pm
Respect and honour your parents..that will eventually make them eager to listen to you and love you.
September 8th, 2020 8:46pm
Every set of parents are different. Most don't listen to their kids because parents believe they know what's best for you, when in reality, YOU know what's best for YOU. Sometimes it takes standing your ground and proving your parent wrong when they underestimate you. Most of the time, it takes "proving your worth" to them, which shouldn't be necessary, but is what they seek. Only you know your worth, and your worth is never below anyone else. You have to believe in yourself, your cause, your skills to have the confidence to stand up to them. However, don't constantly shove in their face your qualifications: frequently butting heads may deescalate your progress, and you don't want that. Overall, it's a painstakingly slow process that requires a lot of patience.