how can I spend time with my family but not let them stress me out?
Last Updated: 01/28/2019 at 4:07pm
Shruti Naik, MS in Counselling and Psychotherapy
I'm passionate about providing a non-judgmental & supportive platform to my clients to help them understand & accept themselves & overcome any emotional issues troubling them.
Top Rated Answers
Spend quality time with them. Have conversations about things that really matter, listen to their point of view as well, if you're 18+ and you think you know what is it that you exactly want, go ahead with what you feel like. Because if you fail in future, you'll know that it was your choice and it was worth the try.
Spend your time with your family but when you start to feel stress, just relax and breath deeply and try to concentrate on something else
By spending time with your family you are bonding with them, as a teenager it is hard because of your hormones. Your hormones are essential for your body but there are side effects: anger, depression, stress, anxiety and many more. But to spend time with your family can be hard because they could be the main source of these and you just want to get away. If this is the case. I suggest spending the most little time with them with out them questioning you. This can be hard but can also be achievable.
Dividing the amount of time you spend with your family into smaller chunks can really help if they tend to make you stressed. For example, instead of spending five hours with them at once, break it up into 1-2 hour sessions or even smaller increments and stick to your boundaries.
I would definitely recommend camping or hiking with your family and enjoying yourself and enjoy the company.
Spending time with family can be hard, especially if you are an adult. It is easier to take it one day at a time. If being with family stresses you out, I would not spend 100% of my time with them, but take a few hours out of your day and see them. Remember to relax and remember that you will not be stuck there forever.
Trying not to diskuss too much can be really helpful, just try to accept everyone's opinion and not judge although you would rather proof that they are completely wrong about something, of course if it's something that considers you, you shouldn't hesitate to clarify your view, look foward to family meetings and try to not already have a negative attitude before you even see your family, simply a positive attitude can change a lot ! :-)
Just have to be there for them. Avoid upsetting topics and just have fun. When they do raise upsetting topics, just accept the points they lay down. Don't have to agree immediately, just merely accept the points.
Tell them not to stress you out, I'm sure they'll respect what you have to say and don't let then stress you out, by spending time with them but not giving them the opportunity to stress you out, tell them how you feel.
Every time I sit with my family they start talking about how I always get ranked 1st I class every year when I know that this year I'm probably going to be 3rd so it always creeps me out how I'll end up disappointing the . However, I simply learned not to care about living up to people expectations but to only live up to mine.
I think it’s really important to set boundaries. If you’re able to talk to them and let them know exactly what it is that stresses you out I would try that. If you can’t talk to them about that then I would suggest taking timeouts when you start to feel stressed. If things get to be too much just politely excuse yourself and take a few minutes for yourself to just breathe and calm down.
Time limitation. Family can be tough even for people who have good relationships with them, pressure, expectations etc can be draining so I recommend making visits with family short and sweet. Call them if you don't feel up to visiting. If you do want to spend time with them try to steer conversation away from anything that causes you stress and if you feel overwhelmed have an exit strategy- an 'errand' to run or a meeting to get to. Your mental health comes first remember.
I think this question is really a question about boundaries which in turn is a question of "what do I need to be physically and emotionally safe." As the answer to this question will vary by the individual there is no one size fits all. However, how to set and assert boundaries is a common concern it is worthy looking at ways others have dealt with the problem. Literature suggest that when it comes to toxic relationships that can't be avoided certain frameworks such as the grey rock meathod and toxic toolkit can be effective. But in the end it's really how you answer your own question of "What dose feeling safe mean to me, and how can I achieve physical and emotional safety when I am around this person."
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