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Claudette Pretorius, MA Counselling Psychology
Licensed Professional Counselor
I know how overwhelming it can feel when you're having a tough time. I offer clients a space that is non-judgemental and empathetic whilst navigating these times together.
Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
May 5th, 2016 5:10am
You know that by her actions and behavior towards you, and most importantly ask her to know how she feels about you. That answer she gives and the way you perceive it will depend on whether you trust her or not.
Come what may, however your mother in law treats you, you do not return blow for blow. She may abuse you, she may tell you that the sun and moon have switched places, but choose harmony over truth, and turn her around.
You can't.. Unless you ask he upfront. And it is much harder if your mother in law is in her 50s of 60s. Experience taught me that elderly tend to be complicated. But maybe thats just my grandma.
Anonymous
May 21st, 2016 4:28pm
Observe how she behaves you when Your husband is not around and see the differences. If she treats you like a daughter. Then she is the best.
GIVE IT TIME
If your mother-in-law doesn’t like you, try to wait it out and see if the situation improves.
An initially difficult relationship can evolve into one of mutual tolerance, and even friendship.
It may take years for this change to occur, but it can happen, much to your surprise.
If she is closer then usual, if so try to keep a distance unless you like her too, if so tell her your feeling
From my own experience I think you could tell that when my mother in law started asking questions about my own interests in life I realised she should have liked me. Because I believe that you will not start asking questions and interacting if you do not like another person.
If you really like your mother in law then she will also like you. If she likes you she will make small efforts to ensure that you are looked after.
Anonymous
June 2nd, 2016 3:16am
Take advice from your own mother. For she has experience in the mother on law department. And also the mother of the girlfriend or boyfriend,etc. Ask her to help guide you in observing if your mother in law is being real with you.
Well, this can be a difficult question. Because only a person "themselves" can truly know what their feelings are towards someone. The important thing is if you are feeling bad vibes from someone who is in your life, or apart of your life, one of the best things to do would be to keep the lines of communication open. Being able to communicate your feelings is key. Being able to share how you are feeling with your mother in law could be the first step to moving forward in a better relationship with her.
Anonymous
June 3rd, 2016 11:37am
well i think the best way to find that out is to try to call her out for a help while she is watching her favorite TV show. she if she cares.
She treats you with respect, and tries to spend her free time with you, or go out for a cup of coffee, or shopping. Also, when your conversations become longer, and more honest -- that's a true sign.
If someone likes you, they definitely will try to show affection towards you and they will always try to make you feel warm and welcome.
I don't know, I'm a child. I am not not married not have I ever been in a serious relationship. Again I'm a child.
Anonymous
June 11th, 2016 5:00pm
If your mother-in-law likes you you'll know by doing the following. ASK HER :) I think it is important to have open discussions with your partners family to ensure an easier (not easy) relationship.
Anonymous
June 12th, 2016 1:23pm
She smiles at you and laugh at your jokes. You'll feel it in your instincts. She gives you a warm pats in the back!
Anonymous
June 13th, 2016 12:17am
I have always found it difficult to judge the emotions of others toward me, especially if those people are close - like family or friends. This can add stress to how you think of your interactions/relationship with this person overall, and leave you feeling like you have to try harder to gain acceptance.
I think it is important to remember that sometimes people simply do not like other people, and unfortunately that is part of life and that will never change - however, as long as you are polite, respectful and generally try to be a good person, it will be difficult for others to dislike you
Instead of bluntly asking her try to get in her good side. Condition her to associate happy thoughts with your presence. An example of this is by getting her favorite thing or a little goody everytime you see her. Or sometimes.
Try to sit down and talk with her about the situation. If you feel she doesn't like you, confront her and express your feelings towards her. :)
Honestly, she might not. Just be the best person you can be, if she doesn't like you then its alright. Give her time to know that you won't hurt their child and everything will be ok.
Sounds like you'd like to have a closer relationship with your mother in law. Do the two of you ever get to spend time together? If so tell me about those experiences.
Anonymous
June 16th, 2016 2:12pm
It will be obvious. She will make effort to have conversations with you, she will invite you along to family occasions, you will feel like a part of the family
Anonymous
June 16th, 2016 4:00pm
In a serious low energy situation, try to tell her how you feel about her and your spouse. This may prompt her to tell you how she feels about you. If it doesn't, just observe her reaction when you talk about yourself. Of course, you could also ask her about it in a similar situation.
The best thing you can do is ask! I'm sure if she likes you, she will definitely tell you so. If not, you are one step closer to talking things through and finding a common ground to repair any issues that may be present in your relationship. She will likely respect you for wanting to grow a stronger relationship with her.
Best of luck.
You can probably tell your mother in law likes you by her body language. The best way to know your mother in law likes you is to have conversations with her. If she is able to have kind conversations with you about anything then she probably likes you.
Mothers in law can be intimidating just thinking about what can go wrong with them. Its okay. First of all, try not be over nice and be yourself, most of all. You can ask your partner to talk with their mother about you to have a clear idea or watch out for her expressions and whatever she says when she is around you. Mothers in law won't hide their feelings too much, because it's basically about their kid's happiness. If something's off, you'll probably know.
Well if she treats you like part of the family and she includes you in situation that are great and bad and having trust and gives you the respect you need
well, you can speak with her, interact with her, like any other human. if she likes you, she'll respond favorably and naturally towards you, perhaps. again, like any other human.
Have you ever tried partaking in an activity with her? Maybe that will help you two talk to one another. Yet, has she ever given you a reason to suspect that she doesn't like you? If so, how?
Normally, you can get a general idea of if someone likes you through the way they talk to you or the way they treat you. If they seem cut off from you or seem to act differently (more negatively) around you than others, maybe this could be a sign of dislike.
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