Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How can I tell if my mother in law likes me?

157 Answers
Last Updated: 10/02/2021 at 2:24am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Mark Harrison, MSW, LICSW, PIP

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I invite you into therapy with an open mind, warm positive regard, and no judgement.

Top Rated Answers
EsmeRose
September 1st, 2016 6:23pm
Normally, you can get a general idea of if someone likes you through the way they talk to you or the way they treat you. If they seem cut off from you or seem to act differently (more negatively) around you than others, maybe this could be a sign of dislike.
Anonymous
September 7th, 2016 5:26am
If your mother in law likes you her gesture will show the affection & love to you. She will not judge you in every single work you do. She will understand your point of view and try to teach you what is best for the family either questioning on you
Anonymous
September 28th, 2016 12:38am
You can look at how your interactions have been with her. For myself, when I met my former partner's mother, she was very kind instantly and always was. To build that relationship I helped her with makeup related things whenever she needed it, and made conversations with her.
HarveyM
October 10th, 2016 4:50pm
The best way to determine whether your mother-in-law likes you (or anyone for that matter) is to ask them :D
Anonymous
October 14th, 2016 3:45pm
If she wants to spend time with you or if she's interested in getting to know you then she likes you. Most mother-in-laws spend a lot of time trying to make their daughters and son-in laws lives miserable if they do not like them.
Anonymous
October 21st, 2016 1:11pm
I only knew with mine when we finally were able to talk and be friendly around one another without the husband having to be there.
Anonymous
October 22nd, 2016 10:13pm
If she doesn't seems like faking her love for you. My mother in law give me little presents to remind me that she thinks about me. It's all about the context and the warm feeling of being accepted :)
Anonymous
October 23rd, 2016 12:04am
Ask her. If you are having doubts, genuinely take her aside and ask her and tell her how you feel. Maybe discuss it with your significant other as well
Anonymous
October 29th, 2016 6:41pm
I'd suggest you focus on reasons why you think you need her approval as well as trying to be good to her - being genuinely kind, polite, respectful and useful can help improve most relationships
Aquarius84
October 30th, 2016 5:46pm
Ask her. When we don't know others, we judge. When we get to know them, we start to make connections. Some people will always find reasons to not like others, but if you are genuine, then they will have no reason not to like you and if they still dont, then the problem is within them.
strawberryPudding82
December 9th, 2016 11:38am
That is a tough one. If she offers advice, helps you with things you need, is polite and inviting which can be totally different from what you expect. Take into consideration her child you are married to. Some people are naturally loud or gruff so that is not something to go by when assessing whether they like you or not. You can listen to advice but it doesn't mean you have to use it depending on you but do consider it.
Youareberrybeautiful
December 16th, 2016 2:34am
Try to interact with her maybe invite her out for coffee or dinner. That way you can tell by her reaction and how you interact whether or not she's fond of you.
Supergirl94
January 26th, 2017 2:52am
Listen to how she talks to you, what she says to you or even about you. How she refers to you when talking to other people :) Generally you will know if they do not like you ;)
magicallyBraveheart22
March 19th, 2017 11:51am
Her gratitude will say it all, how she cares for you and scolds you for all wrong doing, how eager is she to share her stories and how much she guides you will say all that she feels for you .
Mushu74
March 29th, 2017 4:38pm
I've been through the same thing. Personally we don't get on but I looked for signs, ask yourself - does she make you feel awkward? Uncomfortable? Is she genuine & not being false? Is she kind to you?
Vronica23
May 13th, 2017 1:03pm
I think sometimes connecting with in-laws can be a little tough. I think instinctively we want them to like and approve of us, they're family after all. It can be a challenge for some people to feel comfortable talking to their in-laws at first, but remembering that they are the parents of the person we chose to spend our life with is a pretty good motivator. I think starting simple, opening the lines of communication with them, letting them know you would like to have a good relationship with them is a good way to feel out the situation. Sometimes it may seem like someone doesn't like you because they feel just as nervous and awkward about how to start up a conversation. You both have common ground in that you both want what's best for your partner, so don't be afraid to use that common ground to your advantage.
Anonymous
June 11th, 2017 5:38am
You can tell if your mother in law likes you if she treats you as her own loves to cook with you and gets along with you.Plus if she comforts you and has open arms.she may act like a second mother to you
enchantingApple96
July 13th, 2017 5:51am
You can tell by the way she looks at you and talks to you. If she keeps smiling and gives a warm reactions over your words and actions, it will be sure that she likes you. You can tell if she 100% likes you when your spouse/fiance is not around. That's when the real her appears.
kindEyes15
August 11th, 2017 4:07am
You can tell if your mother in law loves you by her her kindness and compassion. She will support you and guide you whenever she can. She acts like your mother, but gives you space at the same time. She listens carefully and speaks wisely. She loves you unconditionally.
VanessaGraceStory
August 11th, 2017 9:44pm
You may ask her, if she doesn't hesitate to tell you then you can about figure it out what she may mean really. Everyone is different and you just gotta hope its true what she tells you. If she says she doesn't, then you might as well try avoiding her if there isn't fixing that thought. We can't control what others think. If she has a reason why she does or doesn't then don't try changing yourself just for getting liked if she doesn't.
colorfulSoul16
August 20th, 2017 11:32pm
Look at the way she treats you. Actions can tell you a lot about how others feel about you. Is she kind to you? Does she ask you if you're alright? Does she show a general concern for your well-being? If she does do those things, then she most likely like you.
calmParadise87
August 31st, 2017 6:20pm
I feel you can tell if you mother in law likes you if she is attentive to your needs and concerns. If she tries to communicate with you even when there is nothing to really communicate about. If she calls you on occasion or texts you. If she shows interests in your needs, etc.,
Anonymous
November 9th, 2017 4:34pm
Try maybe taking her out on a nice lunch with you and your wife try to always treat her nice she should see that you care
gracefulKitty32
December 3rd, 2017 10:15pm
It really depends on the person. Different people reveal things like this in different ways. It is important to remember that other people's opinions of you aren't what counts
Viizipn17
December 6th, 2017 2:57pm
Well, it depends on how she acts towards you. She may smile around you a lot, she may talk to you often, and hugs may be a part of that too. You have to pay attention to her smile and her attitude when she's towards you in order for you to know she likes you.
havartilikeits1999
December 8th, 2017 2:21am
Does she treat you kindly, or as kindly as she treats other people she ostensibly likes (e.g. your partner)? Does she give you compliments? Has your partner suggested that she likes you? Some people show affection in ways that you might not expect, but if you feel like you are being mistreated, you are under no obligation to engage with her any more than necessary.
KimtheNaturalist
January 18th, 2018 4:59pm
The simplest answer would be to ask her. If this is too forward for you, try being present and watching her actions towards you through her gestures. Does she maintain eye contact? Does she face you when speaking?
Jasmine7860
January 20th, 2018 6:07pm
If she's acts and behaves kindly and respects and honour your decisions of life. Treats you like her own kid
KittenMittons
February 8th, 2018 3:23pm
I think it's important that you're even asking this question. It shows that you care enough to want her to like you and if your mother in law is blessed with normal human perception then she'll see that and be flattered. Some questions to ask yourself might be: Does she greet me warmly? Does she try to limit my time with my spouse? Has she ever expressed any negative opinions of me to my spouse? How does her approval affect my own self-image and my spouse's perception of me?
heartfulloflove04
February 24th, 2018 5:19am
She'll probably talk to you a lot, talk about you a lot, or want to engage in conversation with you a lot. You'll see her smile a lot when she talks to you and she'll want to include you in sorts of things to show you how much she likes you.