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How can I tell my mother I'm pregnant?

111 Answers
Last Updated: 10/27/2020 at 9:55am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
Moderated by

Tanyia Hughes, Adv Dip Psy


I have been through a lot in life too, which helps me to be able to empathize with situations, thoughts and feelings that we have. Sometimes, it's not easy just being human.

Top Rated Answers
April 29th, 2016 3:41pm
I honestly don't think there is an obvious wrong or right way to do it. Either way, (also depending on your age) it's going to be a surprise. If you are a minor or relatively young I would just start out with "Mom, I really need to talk to you about something, and please know that this is not an easy thing for me to tell you, but you're my mom and if I can't go to you about this, then who?" Make her feel like you're telling her because you trust her and want her help and support. Don't go about it in a "This is my life, my choices. Like it or not." (unless you are an adult of course) Make her feel like you need her. If you're scared don't be afraid to let her know that. It will make her want to comfort you rather than make you feel worse. (Of course this varies on person to person, depending on both of you and your relationship) Ask her for tips. Options. Anything. If she flips out or is just plain shocked and can't talk to her, understand the position she is in too. Give her time to accept it and work through her first feelings. You can even say, "Mom, I know this might be shocking and we can talk more about this later if you want, but, I'm pregnant, and I just felt like thats something I shouldnt keep from you." If she flat out groans and walks away, then leave it at that. At least she knows, and eventually she will probably talk to you about it another time, probably with something like, "So, what are you going to do?" Or, "Who is the father?" Be prepared because chances are you will get a buttload of questions, so start thinking of some answers.
May 1st, 2016 1:09am
Wow, there is a lot of advice here and you probably don't need any more. I'll just tell you what happened when my daughter faced that situation. She was date raped and decided she couldn't possibly carry to term. She assumed that I would not agree with her decision , but she had the courage to tell me anyway. When I had that happen to me a very lone time ago, I couldn't tell my mother- or anyone. I was proud to be the kind of mother that accepted her choice and supported her 100 %. But back to how she "broke the news" - She said, Mom can we take a walk? I know it was something serious, but I think the "walking" helped us both. We didn't have to constantly look each other in the eye during the conversation, and the movement helped to keep us breathing! When we got back home, we had set upon a plan, and I'll always be grateful that she trusted me- I feel your mom will too- even though I don't know her or your relationship. I'm just sharing my own experience. Wishing you all well.
January 14th, 2016 11:10am
You have to reach acceptance with who you are and your current situation, make sure you are comfortable and in good spirits with your mother before you break the news. Be open with her, she raised you from the very start and she'll be invaluable to helping you do the same! Be aware that everyone would be nervous to tell their parents but through grace and patience you will tell her when the time is right :)
January 22nd, 2016 9:30pm
Shell eventually find out. Sometimes its best to just tell her. Even if it hurts her or even yalls relationship.
January 28th, 2016 6:17pm
Sit her down and tell her in a calm manner that your pregnant or if your not comfortable with that maybe try writing her a letter
March 25th, 2016 6:27am
Take her to a place she feels comfortable in , do the things she likes you to do all day , and try telling her over dinner with quite and calm voice.
July 6th, 2016 1:26pm
Nothing can work better than face to face confrontation. Never do it in a letter or text, words on a screen or paper can never express emotion.
January 22nd, 2016 4:12am
jus take her to a better place where she like and explain the situation calmy and then explain your story
February 21st, 2016 4:30pm
Tell her that you have to tell her something extremely important and then surprise the shit out of her!
January 22nd, 2016 4:31pm
Approach her when she is calm and tell her you need her help and someone to talk to. When you'll tell her, I'm sure she won't deny to help you dealing with this. Remember that she loves you.
January 24th, 2016 12:41am
Calm down and be confident. Then tell her and try to calm her down if she freaks out. Things will be fine
January 28th, 2016 7:10pm
Inform your mother that you need to talk to her, set up a time. When its time to talk insure that your mother is ready to listen. Disclose the information and work together to insure that both you and your mothers needs have been addressed. If you need support you may ask someone to be part of the conversation
February 3rd, 2016 5:36am
Just be honest and tell her how you are going to handle the situation and what is your decision on the pregnancy.
February 3rd, 2016 4:14pm
Just have a private conversation with her, and tell her, she is your mother so she will totally understand you and the situation you are in so don't be afraid, just tell her
February 4th, 2016 6:43am
If you're scared that she's going to be upset, maybe its better to write her a letter and be out of the house when she reads it. That way she knows, but she has time for it to sink in?
February 7th, 2016 3:26am
Oh wow, doozy love. I reccomend sitting her down and saying 'I'm really afraid of how you're going to react, but I need to tell you something. ' and just lead into what happened before you tell her because you don't want to give your poor mother a heart attack. Honesty is best policy, and I would tell her sooner than later.
February 7th, 2016 5:38am
To keep her and you from getting into a compromising position, sit her down while you and her both have the time to talk (it make take awhile for the news to soak in). After you tell her, give her time and let her say what she feels she needs to say.
February 13th, 2016 7:02am
be calm ! everthing hax solution .. just tell her about the whole scene she definitely will understand the situation
February 13th, 2016 10:03am
Be honest.. tell her you need to talk to her and just be honest. Honesty is the best things in these types of problems!
February 14th, 2016 2:38pm
first of all make sure youre environment is safe and you have someone to back you up if it goes wrong then just be honest and tell her.
February 14th, 2016 4:57pm
That depends always in the type of relationship you have with her. If she's open minded nice to talk to, then it should be a bit difficult at the beginning, but you'll make it, always try to show her responsibility and matureness cause we're talking about an important subject. If your parents are conservative, and have lack of understand, it's going to be more difficult to you, but always keep in mind that you are taking the good steps. They'll try to understand it with time. And people can always surprise us, we never know how they might react so we keep in living
February 17th, 2016 4:50pm
Ask her if you can talk for five or ten minutes (depending on how long you think it'll take). For some mothers, it may take them a long time to adjust but you just have to give her her space depending on her reaction.
February 17th, 2016 10:18pm
it genuinely depends on what kind of person your mother is but assuming that she is loving and willing to listen, The best thing so do is to sit her down alone and explain to her, as simply as possible, that you're pregnant. Its really important to tell her the complete truth, yes, including who the father is, even if you don't feel comfortable because the only way to get her full support is with honesty and trust. i hope this helps love Z
February 18th, 2016 1:17pm
Just open up to her, chances are it might not be as bad as you think. tell her you came to her because you trust her and want to share with her whats happening to you.
February 19th, 2016 10:28pm
Be upfront. Tell her honestly about it. And make sure you tell her yourself, she'd feel horrible knowing it from someone else.
February 20th, 2016 7:23am
Think about how your parents have reacted to other situations that may be similar to this or not. You know your parents' personalities so you may have to choose the words yourself. The important thing is to tell them in a calm way.
February 20th, 2016 4:00pm
She is your mom. If anything, she'll be the most understanding. Try to break it down slowly. It might be a lot to process for her.. But you will get through it.
February 25th, 2016 4:56am
Try asking her how she would feel if you were, and texting her the news. It will be easier than saying it to her face.
February 25th, 2016 1:19pm
Be honest with her, try do it calmly, without rush of emotions. Being calm is the best way to do it, you're showing that you have everything under control.
February 26th, 2016 8:13pm
Sit her down and tell her face to face. She will respect you more for that. It might be very scary and she might be upset but it will work out in the end