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How do I handle the pressure from my family to do well in school and to succeed in life?

14 Answers
Last Updated: 03/24/2020 at 1:14am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Veronica Wade-Hampton, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I enjoy working with individuals of all capacities as I view the role of therapist as one in which you help the client learn to cope with the pressures of daily life.

Top Rated Answers
CourageousPal26
January 28th, 2015 7:40pm
Try the best you can in school, but if you can't meet your family's pressure, that's ok. Tell them that you're doing the best you can and tell them that you want to enjoy life while doing the best in school too. I'm sure that your parents want the best for you; and the best for you is to be happy and successful. But not one without the other.
IreneGrey
February 10th, 2015 3:29pm
It is important for you to discern what you define as success and happiness and what your family expects of you. Also understand that if you push yourself too hard, you're running the risk of burning out, thus prolonging the period of time your performance will need to be adjusted. Sometimes we share with our family only our results, but it is equally crucial to explain to them the process/steps we take daily to achieve our goals. In that way, they'll have a clearer picture of your efforts.
flxrxleen
April 29th, 2015 2:20am
I think it's best to talk to your family, however to stay cool at the same time. It's important to show to your parents that you are really trying your best, and talk to them academic success isn't everything. What's most important is your well-being. If you cannot cope, i'm sure they will understand. If not, seek help from a school counselor.
Anonymous
May 7th, 2015 9:43pm
from past experiences you should just do all your work and push through because once you have finished in school you are free to do whatever you want in life
KathyTheHealer
May 21st, 2015 9:03am
Instead of keep thinging how to deal with the pressure, please don't hold the pressure in your head anymore if you want to succeed in life. Living to someone else 's expectation ( even it's your parents) can be very misleading. This is a very common situation happens: your natural talents are art or music, but your parents expect you to be a doctor. You try all your brain to study but fail of becoming a doctor. You end up feeling useless for the rest of your life. Who told you that you have to be as good as others think you should be? Success in life is very simple like this: Study what you like, and after study, work to earn money. Use the money to buy great food , clothes, cars and travel the world. IF you earn more than enough, help your parents and others: pay their medical bills, buy their new cars, etc. They will be very proud of you. If you earn a lot, you can help a great deal of people. Why does a person become a philanthropist? Because he can. Have you ever seen any philanthropist who is poor? No, right? If you are poor, where is the money to buy food and shelters for the poor? That's the way to get successful in life, and that's how you change the world.
Ruby6x
July 13th, 2015 12:50pm
Find you're own path in life. I am sure they want what is best for you, but if the pressure is building up, then explain you need to find you're own path in what you want to do.
Anonymous
April 19th, 2016 5:33am
Pressure is a constant if you do things only to please others. Stop pleasing them. Do the things you love instead and succeeding will just come naturally because you do what you love.
Greatlistener87
July 19th, 2016 1:51am
Parents often have high hopes for their kids because they always believe their kids are the best at everything. But it does not mean if you didn't achieve what they wanted they will love u less. They will just motivate u to do better.
Anonymous
October 10th, 2016 10:16pm
Your succeeding for your self, you do what makes you happy. Seems like there are a lot of pressure from your family. Take each day as it comes and show your independency. They will soon back off
Anonymous
October 24th, 2016 3:33pm
Everytime I feel pressured by my family, I simply talk to them. I tell them that they dont have to worry because Im doing the best I can in school.
JJill1
January 23rd, 2018 11:45pm
Personally, in these high-stress times of school and work, I find it best to take a little time to relax each day. Maybe a hobby or activity you enjoy? It can help escape from the pressures of life. Concerts, getaways, or art are some things that take me away from life
Anonymous
June 25th, 2018 11:23am
Be your self,do what pleases you the most in life,all families want to see their offspring succeed in life, they worry about you,therefore it's normal to feel pressured by them to do well
Anonymous
July 30th, 2019 6:25pm
Just do the best you can. Try to relax. As long as you do the best you can, there is nothing more anyone can reasonably expect from you. Set aside time for school work and make sure you complete any necessary homework and study. Khan Academy is a great resource if you need some assistance. Also, don't be afraid to ask your teachers questions. It's part of their job. If you're afraid to ask them during class, try to ask them before or after class or during a study hall. Make sure you get enough sleep. If you don't, you'll have a whole other set of problems.
Anonymous
March 24th, 2020 1:14am
If your behind in school, There's a method my mom taught me when I was in middle school, she called it 20:10, it's where you work hard for 20 minutes and then do what ever you want for 10. When I fall behind I don't plan on finishing it all at once, I make a plan of what I'm going to do and do my best to follow my plan. If your fealing pressured I figured out that talking to the teacher, telling them about your pressure from your parents and asking them for help is super useful and telling your parents that your stressed out about the amout of pressure put on you.