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How do I maintain healthy boundaries if my parents are fighting with each other?

11 Answers
Last Updated: 05/20/2019 at 9:36am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Stacey Kiger, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

My belief is that therapy is not about giving advice, but joining you on your journey

Top Rated Answers
January 25th, 2015 9:30pm
Remove yourself from the situation as best you can, and realize that it's not your fault. If you can't leave the situation, keep calm and don't feed into the negative energy.
January 28th, 2015 9:51pm
It can be a wild place to be, but focus on what you need as a human being, without outside input. Be sure you are absolute about what you think good boundaries are for you.
February 16th, 2015 7:43pm
You should give them space to work out their problems. If it worsens however, you should recommend them to a marriage counselor.
May 4th, 2015 4:25pm
Remind yourself that their fighting doesn't have to do with you. Even if they are fighting about something pertaining to you, it's between them and you don't need to get involved.
June 2nd, 2015 10:43pm
If you feel stuck in the middle, you need to make it clear to your parents that you do not want to take sides and regardless of the arguments that have, you wish that they would at least come together for your sake. If you want to maintain a good relationship with both of them, speak up about it.
July 13th, 2015 7:32am
I feel like your parents have been together for long enough to deal with there own problems. I feel like let them be they will figure it out
September 21st, 2015 6:06am
When your parents are fighting with each other, you can find someone you trust that you can confide in to share your honest true feeling about the situation. its important to feel safe and express the emotions you're feeling.
October 26th, 2015 5:34pm
You can come on 7 cups of tea and talk with me I am here for you. Your parents maybe fighting but remember you are loved by the both of them a lot.
October 27th, 2015 3:13pm
Try to find a sense of peace with them and yourself. Never blame yourself for what your parents are going through, remember that. Try to consider how lucky in life you are even if your family might be fighting.
September 18th, 2017 4:55pm
One of the best things I did for myself was take the time to tell them that I am not their in-between. If you feel safe and comfortable tell this to them each one on one. Sometimes parents can be so blinded by what they're going through that they can forget how tough it is to be in the middle of something you can't control. Another thing that's helpful is talking to other people about the experience. Even if someone hasn't experienced the exact thing, I bet they've experienced something similar, and nothing feels better than some level of solidarity with those around you.
May 20th, 2019 9:36am
In every relationship there are fights and arguments it's normal. You just have to understand that and let your parents sort it out within themselves. But if it's getting really disturbing or becoming an "everyday thing" you can talk to your parents about how it's affecting you and try to convince them to not fight anymore. If that's not working you can always try to spend time away and detach yourself from the situation by spending time at library, playground , at friends house etc. But in any case if it's getting to the point of domestic violence you need to call the emergency numbers immediately. Because that's unacceptable behavior.