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How to stop hating your little brother?

162 Answers
Last Updated: 04/04/2021 at 5:06pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Traci Seery, LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

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Top Rated Answers
June 2nd, 2017 4:23pm
Siblings often resent each other. Arguing with, fighting with, and ignoring siblings is completely natural. Realizing that at some points there are situations when both parties are at fault, can help you realize that emotions are complicated and that maybe hatred can be calmed with control of emotions.
June 30th, 2017 6:56pm
Although siblings can be annoying and although they sometimes are a part in rivalry, they are our playmates, our teachers and our protectors in the long run. To have someone who could watch your back in bad times and provide you a support no one else can do is priceless. That's why, even though we are annoyed at them from time to time, it might be a good thing to keep in mind that our little brothers are there for us.
July 23rd, 2017 6:57am
I think siblings will always have a love-hate relationship. But in the end, always remember that the best gift your parents could ever give you is your sibling. You may not see it now but someday, when all this "hate" fades away, you will see that bond.
August 11th, 2017 2:56am
hate often comes from a place of misunderstanding. Is is important to acknowledge that although you and your brother might be very different people who do not mix very well together, it does not mean he is not worthy of respect or the same treatment you would want from others. Try to avoid situations of conflict when possible
August 18th, 2017 12:00pm
Spend more time with him, introduce him to games that you enjoy and that you could play together, this way you can bond and learn more about eachother
August 19th, 2017 6:51am
Remind yourself that he shares your blood. He's born into your family, just a few years later than you have. Just close your eyes and think for a second. How would you feel if he wasn't present in your life for a day? I have a little brother myself. I can't think of a day without him. I resented him when I was younger, but he never resented his older sister. He loved me everyday and he proved it through actions when he was at the tender age of 5 years old. So, don't hate your brother. Although you may, he'll never do so.
October 14th, 2017 5:38pm
Play with your little brother, read him books, laugh a lot, play board games, always say that you love him when he gets hurt and then give him a kiss on the cheek, he is just little trying to learn new things about the world around us and the little ones depend on the big ones to be nice to them and to look out for them, so always remember we were once little too and we were probably the same way.
November 11th, 2017 2:27am
A question I used to ask myself when my little brother and I didn't get along well was, "Is it worth it to hate him?" I cannot move forward projecting my emotions if I cannot rationalize the emotion. In the end, I end up drained, fatigued and just fed up with my behavior and feelings towards someone, even if in my honest opinion, my emotions are merited/ valid. In the end, is it worth it, for yourself, to hate him?
November 22nd, 2017 11:15pm
Calm down, he's little not everything he does is going to be perfect he's young and still has Alot to learn. I've learned this from experience
December 13th, 2017 8:17pm
It is very hard to understand that your little brother didn't do anything to come into the world. Find ways to connect with him and understand him a little bit better. I have found out that with a connection it is easier to understand.
December 27th, 2017 4:35am
Start by seeing that he is the person with whom you live and you will be connected for life, whether you want to or not, but if you hate him, it is because you care, maybe he should stop caring and maintain respect and indifference, so it will not be part of your life and you will not spend your energy and time hating it, or maybe you should just talk to him, it depends on the cases of each one but, maybe you will discover things about your brother that you did not know before :)
January 10th, 2018 8:46am
There are good and bad aspects of everything depending on who you are. Siblings never constantly like each other. However it's a good idea to also look at the good from your brother, even if it isn't aimed at you. Does he get good grades, ride a skateboard well, is he a good friend, etc.? Try to find the good in there.
January 13th, 2018 2:40pm
Understand that maybe he does things to irritate you or make you hate him because he is upset about the lack of attention he gets, or perhaps he wants to be like you. Most of the behaviors younger siblings do stem from their desire to be like their older siblings. Try to be patient with him, as you are older and more mature, and try to focus on good qualities that he has day by day.
February 2nd, 2018 8:28pm
What you want to do is find out the root of your hatred and find a way to ease the anger. Talking it out is often the best, just approaching it directly.
February 7th, 2018 12:50pm
everyday think of 3 things that you love and appreciate about him, concentrating on the positive things about him may help lessen the negatives.
February 16th, 2018 6:41pm
Understanding that your brother is younger than you, and is your family. No matter what, you’ll always have him.
March 1st, 2018 10:20am
Have you tried finding a mutual interest something that you both enjoy doing or something you could enjoy doing together? Maybe even taking time to look at photos and recall memories from happier times can help bring you closer together
March 7th, 2018 4:45am
He is your little brother, imagine if you lost him. Think of that feeling, not a good feeling right? Don't take everything for granted, especially for your loved ones.
March 8th, 2018 5:26am
This is a question that requires you to look at a lot of things. There would always be a reason for such hate. The best way would be to look at why you hate them. Going to the root of the problem is important. having found what the cause is , you need see if a solution can be found. Since you want to stop hating you little brother, and the fundamental being "you" want to stop , you should know that where there is a will there is always a way. Primarily however it would be best to see the root of the problem
April 22nd, 2018 10:58pm
understanding he is in a different phase/age in his life, being thoughtful and trying to guide him in his growing process
April 26th, 2018 3:37pm
I think getting to know him and learning why you are so angry about things could help you find compassion in things. Siblings are often hard to deal with, but remember, they too are going through things. Perhaps he may not see things as maturely as you do, but give it some time, he may need to grow a bit more. Most siblings torture each other when they are young, but gain a great bond as they grow. Be patient and try to stay calm during those tough days by not giving into the anger but instead, find a positive coping skill that works for you. It could be writing, music, taking a walk or calling a friend. Good luck!
May 3rd, 2018 5:08am
Try to understand where he's coming from. Try to remember what you were like at that age. Maybe try and spend some time with him or try and give yourself space if you need some. Remember that he's growing and we've all been there.
May 5th, 2018 4:15pm
A lot of the time, hating someone comes from them reminding you of something you don't like about yourself. It's important not to be outwardly rude towards your little brother and instead question what it is about him you hate, and if the things you hate about him, are fears about yourself you have yet to address.
June 23rd, 2018 2:41am
I can certainly understand how little brothers may cramp your style. ;) Tell me a little about what you hate about him. Just for fun, for everything you name that you hate about him you must name one thing that you like about him. Let's try that, ok?
June 27th, 2018 3:55pm
Hate is a strong word. If you feel this way, ask yourself the simple question "why?". Was it something he did? Was it really his fault? Or do I just have a lower tolerance? If so, why? Understand that feeling "hate" will not only affect the people around you, it also taxes your own mind. It is an unnecessary burden to carry, even though it may be justified.
June 28th, 2018 8:51pm
Maybe remembering that you was a little boy too, very active and with a lot of curiosity. It's not his fault, he's just a child and he's learning how to act.
June 29th, 2018 7:23am
Imagine his childhood days how you loved him,think he is your best friend and share everything to him.spend some time
June 29th, 2018 8:36pm
how about spending more time together doing activities like playing games & getting to know each other better
June 30th, 2018 6:13am
I dont think you ever really hate your little brother. I think that there are moments where you want to hate him, but at the end of the day if it comes to protecting him, you have his back. I say just talk to your little brother about what the issue is.
July 20th, 2018 9:17am
You can't choose your family, when you hate someone it's because you see that hate in yourself. Accept what is and embrace it.