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I hate my family and want to move out right when I turn 18... is that okay?

189 Answers
Last Updated: 08/24/2020 at 12:22pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Jackie Dross, M.S. Community Counseling


I have a passion for working with people from a non-judgmental, strengths based approach to meet their goals for personal growth.

Top Rated Answers
December 31st, 2015 10:26am
Yes, that is okay. It is perfectly normal and natural to feel some anger and resentment toward your family, especially if you have been living with them for your whole life. Right now, you are at a stage in which you are becoming more independent and separate from your family. It is very natural to experience tension surrounding this conflict.
December 31st, 2015 9:57pm
Absolutely! When you are 18 you can be responsible for your own well being and no one deserves to be unhappy :)
January 1st, 2016 5:53pm
Depending on how your family have treated you throughout the years - it is important to learn to love those who have raised you and forgiveness is key. However, ultimately the most important thing is to do what ever makes you happy as it is your life, therefore you can do whatever you want with it. On the other hand, running away from your issues will not get you anywhere so considering a discussion or heart-to-heart with family members before moving out would be a good idea to consider as they could even help support your new home :)
January 1st, 2016 10:59pm
You can move out of the family home when you are 18, but surely you would want to be financially stable so that you can get a mortgage or rent somewhere to live.
January 2nd, 2016 4:40pm
i think it depends on the situation. family are, at most, inseparable. they'll always be there. if they are abusive in any way, it's in your best interest to move out away from the negativity. some families don't listen, so finding your own life and independence is the only way forward. try speaking to them about your feelings before leaving. some families do not have an awareness of the impact of their actions.
January 2nd, 2016 4:54pm
Personally, I would try talking to your parents about what makes you want to move out. How you are feeling, and what you would like to change in your relationship to make it a more positive one.
January 2nd, 2016 6:34pm
Of course it is okay to move out right when you turn 18. Most people do. Maybe talk to your family about some of the issues you have or write them a note to clear the air.
January 2nd, 2016 9:14pm
As soon as you turn 18, the choice is your's. So if you feel that it's best for you then it's your choice.
January 2nd, 2016 9:41pm
That's fine. If you need to get away from your family you should not feel pressured to stay with them at all.
January 3rd, 2016 9:44am
Wanting distance from your family is completely understandable and normal. Talking with your family about how you feel might help with some of these feelings.
January 3rd, 2016 7:23pm
Well, I'm not the one who will tell you what is right and what's wrong. But the decisison you are making is a big one and you should really think about it before you make the final decision
January 3rd, 2016 11:03pm
Totally okay. Age 18 is the appropriate age for people to move out. You can also meet better people.
January 3rd, 2016 11:42pm
Wanting to move out as soon as possible is normal for a teenager. I am 16 and i want to move out as soon as i can. I love my mother and she has been an important person in my life. I think resolving whatever issues you have with your family is of paramount importance. If it's so serious that you cant deal with them yourself seek professional help.
January 6th, 2016 1:35am
That is a good route for some people to take. It isn't always easy when your family doesn't understand. I moved out when I went to college, but after graduation I moved back home. Families dont always get along, so if moving out is the best choice, go for it.
January 6th, 2016 5:43am
Moving out is a big decision. You gotta be able to land a job that can pay for, housing, food, water, cell phone bill, the payment on your car, college and other necessities. A job with just a GED requirement wont be pay much and you will struggle. You have to go to college and the only way thats gonna happen is if you get a full ride or you get a loan from the bank and thats another thing you have to pay with your minimum wage job. tough it out through college than you should have the skills available to move out of your home.
January 6th, 2016 10:35am
Yes. You are already in the legal age so you can move out away from your family. As long as you have the money to sustain yourself. On the other hand, hating is not healthy but maybe the hatred may subside even just a little if you move out away from them. I agree to your decision to move out because it's the time whether you will still feel or not the hatred that succumbs you when you are already far away from them.
January 6th, 2016 10:43am
As soon as you turn 18 you'll be legally allowed to shift out. But you have to consider the risks that you'll be taking as you leave.
January 6th, 2016 2:44pm
Well, I think it's ok to move out right away but I think you should let your family know and that you should keep in touch with them.
January 6th, 2016 9:03pm
Short answer? Yes. Well, let me qualify that with a warning: I do not know your situation as well as you, nor could I ever. I think my strong "yes" in this regard has to do with my belief that sometimes getting away from family creates space for us to better get along with them in the future. A break can be a healthy thing, as long as we are safe and secure on that break. In your case, will you be safe moving out at 18? A secure place to live? Proper finances? A support system in place? Unfortunately, we do not get to choose our biological family - but maybe see what you are experiencing as a challenge that you can learn from if you learn to cope with it for the time being. The lessons we learn from our parents may not always be delivered in the prettiest of packages - it sounds like you are learning how you do not want to be yourself in this world. That is a good lesson. Having stated all this, if your hate is motivated by abuse you are suffering, please do seek immediate help: 911 or the National Child Abuse Hotline: 800-4 A CHILD (800-422-4453).
January 7th, 2016 8:30am
Well it depends on the independent and responsibility of the person. The question is do you have a plan that will allow you to be independent and responsible? Will you be able to provide to yourself the necessities of life?
January 7th, 2016 7:37pm
yes it is, you are an adult and you can make that choice, but its really up you, cause everyone is different
January 8th, 2016 2:52am
Dont hate your family.If you want to move out make sure you have a plan.Like a job,place to stay,etc.
January 8th, 2016 3:51am
It's wonderful to move out because you become independent but don't it for the wrong reasons, you should try to figure out why you feel hatred toward you family and talk to them about your feelings, work things out with them, so you can enjoy them while they are still here and have good memories. Hatred is not good for your heart.
January 8th, 2016 7:41am
you wouldn't be considered as a bad person if you actually are not happy where you are right now, and if your family is giving you enough reasons to be hated then it'll be unhealthy for you to keep blaming yourself
January 8th, 2016 3:14pm
It is normal for you to want to be more distant from your family. You just need a bit of privacy at times.
January 8th, 2016 10:56pm
Yes it is very understandable to want to move away when they no longer help you. It will be hard to do but, it can be done and the more you want it the harder you will be willing to work for it.
January 9th, 2016 11:01am
Wanting to move out is perfectly normal. If you feel like you hate your family, maybe you should talk it through with them to find out what's going on
January 9th, 2016 4:27pm
Well, it depends on the case of course. The good thing of a family is that it will always be there. But that's the bad side too! I believe it is wise to learn how to preserve relationships along our life. The way is always to try to stand in other people's shoes. Not easy, but there is no way to keep long term relationships without doing that.
January 9th, 2016 7:52pm
I moved out of the family home when I was 15 and I was on the streets for a year before I was housed. I wish I had put something in place before I moved out but everyone's experience's are different am not sure why you would like to move out but am sure that you can get help to get rehomed if that is what you are looking for
January 10th, 2016 3:05am
That's completely okay! As long as you can support yourself, there is no problem with leaving the nest right away.