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Is it normal to detest my father?

4 Answers
Last Updated: 06/01/2020 at 1:43pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Richard Manson, BSW,CAP

Drug & Alcohol Counselor

Compassionate, non-judgemental and experienced substance abuse therapist driven to helping guide clients to overcome issues relating to abusing drugs and/or alcohol.

Top Rated Answers
July 2nd, 2018 1:57am
Yes especially when he probably has done something hurtful to you maybe for instance my personal experience of my own dad mistreating my mum (even physical abuse) and what happened to me during my childhood. Know that such feelings are normal and natural. Yet, there is power in forgiveness. When we learn to let go and not let the feeling overwhelm us. To understand the feeling of hatred yes it's there but to also just watch that feeling and put it aside after thinking for a while.. not to get too involved in it. It's definitely good to express that feeling out in different ways. For me I journal or talk to people/God and it helped me to have an avenue to vent. I like that I'm slowly opening up and understanding that there are much suppressed feelings inside me.
December 4th, 2018 7:15pm
Well that depends on the father and what he is doing to the person that he is with. I would say it is never normal to detest your father or anyone for that matter. I mean everyone seems to have problems today in this world. And to say the words like detest means to me that you do not want to fix the problem it just means you want to label someone in your view point. It is hard not to judge people today and we have to remain calm in our minds and be careful of the actions of what we do for others. I would have to say that is not a normal thing to be thinking about.
May 13th, 2019 10:27pm
It’s hard to establish what is normal as so many people have different family experiences. Personally I have gone through stages of not liking my father as he has not always been around and that has really negatively impacted me. I often found myself seeking male validation and feeling lonely, but I have learned to improve that and also even managed to forgive my father. I do not know what your father is like so I could not give insight into your relationship with him. However I do find that a father is often the most difficult parental figure.
June 1st, 2020 1:43pm
Yes it is especially if they have done something to shatter the trust and relationship between you both. For example if you father has cheated on your mother or has been abusive towards you. It all depends on the context and not everyone was born to be a parent. For example, if your father has broken the trust and bond between your mother or another family member, remember you have your own personal relationship with your father. Don't get yourself involved in a situation where you detest your father because someone else does as well. But overall I won't say it is normal but it certainly is not abnormal.