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My boyfriend or girlfriend is embarrassed of me. What should I do?

257 Answers
Last Updated: 01/01/2021 at 12:12pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Deane Rain Marie, LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I take a holistic approach in working with eating disorders, mood disorders, relationships, and the LGBTQ community. I use EMDR, Dreamwork, Stories, CBT and Cinema therapy.

Top Rated Answers
heartfulloflove04
February 24th, 2018 5:15am
Theres no reason for them to be embarrassed of you if they love you. They should love you for who you are and if they're embarrassed about any part of you, then they don't deserve you!
Anonymous
March 27th, 2018 5:19pm
If a someone is embarrassed of his\her partner.............just talk to the person.What's the reason??? Personally If someone did that to me...........I think that the person doesn't care about me..My opinion though
Anonymous
April 4th, 2018 12:04am
If your bf/gf seems embarrassed about you, confront them. If you feel that they show you differently to their friends or act differently around you vs. other friends/people, talk to them about it to try to understand why they act that way. They shouldn't treat you differently around different people. You're the same you!
Bubbleycatylistener
April 6th, 2018 9:21am
Your boyfriend or girlfriend shouldn’t be embarrassed with you. If they are I personally don’t think they are worth your time. Love is strong and powerful. Other people’s opinions on what they think about you as a couple shouldn’t affect your relationship. As the greatest showman says “why don’t we rewrite the stars” ❤️
Anonymous
April 7th, 2018 5:45am
sis, you partner should not be embarrassed to be with you! try talking to them about why? that is not love & it sounds toxic. if i were you, i would break up with them. but at the end of the day, you know yourself best.
KindaKate88
April 7th, 2018 6:55pm
In a relationship it should feel open to talk to eachother you should ask your partner why, try to work on that. If it is because of LGBTQ matters remeber that it’s a sensitive subject and just do whatever you can to make them feel comfortable with it. Try to encourage going out alone away from people.
ruedabega13
April 13th, 2018 6:37pm
The best way to figure that out is to ask them! If they are then you can easily have a conversation about it, and compromise on any issues you're having
AprylFools
April 26th, 2018 1:32pm
Confront them and ask why they're embarrassed by you. If they explain the problem to you, then you could try talking to them about it further and reach a solution.
HarleysApricot
April 26th, 2018 7:30pm
You are the master of you. You should ask yourself questions like "Am I okay with this?'' 'How does this make me feel?' , 'Do I like this feeling?' and make decisions based on this.
Anonymous
April 29th, 2018 12:06pm
I guess that depends on whether or not you feel like you have anything to be embarrassed about. If not then you can try talking to them about why they feel embarrassed of you and talk it over. If you do feel like you've done something then again you can talk it over with them. Communication in a relationship is really important and talking things out together can help you make sense of what each other is thinking.
LoveYaGOD
May 10th, 2018 4:08am
I suggest u to approach them and take them to some calm place, hold their hands and say to them that its okay to share things
Anonymous
May 13th, 2018 3:45am
If they your boyfriend/girlfriend really loves you. They should not be embarrassed of you. You may talk to them and ask what is the reason why they are embarrassed of you
Anonymous
May 24th, 2018 1:22pm
Ask your boyfriend or girlfriend why they're embarrassed of you. In a relationship, both partners have to be honest with each other and communicate if something is wrong.
AngelOliviaHelper
May 30th, 2018 6:23pm
They shouldnt be embarassed of you at all! Consider if they're right for you, they should have pride!
Redlioness1111
July 4th, 2018 2:14pm
Communication. Think about why you feel this way. Have examples of what made you suspect that they were embarrassed and talk about it in a non confrontational way.
Bexyb
July 29th, 2018 1:03pm
I would approach them with the reasons as to why you feel they are embarrassed of you. Maybe avoid directly accusing them of this, as you may have read signals wrong. If it turns out they were emabatrased, you can then delve in to what made them feel that way. Communication is key in all relationships.
creativePalm12
August 8th, 2018 10:16am
Leave them. What sort of relationship is it if they're embarrassed by you? The while purpose of being together is because you like the other person, you want to be with them. Embarrassment shouldn't come into it, and if it does, this person is not the right person - you deserve much better.
GabrielaaTaker
August 9th, 2018 3:23am
You should talk to your bf/gf. Communication is key in a relationship. You deserve a lot more then that.
Pianorose
August 18th, 2018 12:03am
Talk to them! Communication should always be your go-to when something in a relationship is troubling you. Once you ask them about it, they can tell you what they're really feeling and why. They might not even be embarrassed of you, it might be something completely different! If it turns out that they are indeed embarrassed, you can discuss with them why they feel this way, then depending on what they answer you can take the next step to working things out with them, whether by changing your actions or habits to make them feel more comfortable or negotiating a compromise with them about the issue.
Anonymous
August 18th, 2018 4:45am
First, you must address why they may be embarassed of you. If you see a future with this partner then you must address the issue and assess how that may make you feel in regards to their feelings as well. On another note, if they have no real reason to be embarassed of you then you must take another look at the relationship and decide how healthy of an environment you’re in. Being embarrassed of a partner should can not be justified unless there are specific reasoning for it. If you love that person then you must communicate your feelings in order to solve this issue.
CaringKaren4412
August 29th, 2018 8:31am
If your significant other feels embarrassed of you, ask them the reasons behind it. Tell them that if it's something you can't change then they will have to understand that you are just being you. Never let a love interest change who you are. When you know you have the right partner they will never ask of you to change. Love is when you cherish a person and all that they are. If that were true then they would not want to change you and who wants to be with a person who is not accepting of the true you?
Anonymous
September 12th, 2018 7:35pm
It’s not a nice feeling to have someone be embarrassed by you, it can bring in shame and then damage your self worth. I would suggest talking to them about it, finding the root of why they’re feeling this way, trying to understand and having a discussion about it. Thing about if this person is really the one for you, at the end of the day love is love and it’s not a good idea to try and change people. I would advocate communicating with them on this issue, telling them how it makes you feel, having an open and honest discussion could help you.
annnnaaaa9
September 20th, 2018 6:20pm
If your partner expresses a feeling of embarrassment towards you, I suggest you talk to them about it. Why is he/she embarrassed of you? Was it a one-time thing (for example you spilling your drink all over yourself in a crowded place) or is it because of you? If this conversation gives you a negative feeling about yourself, one that your partner is not able to take away from you as he/she is embarrassed, you need to consider for yourself if you want to be with this person. No person should feel like their partner is embarrassed of them – it should be the complete opposite: one should be proud of his/her partner.
Maddiegrace16
September 30th, 2018 4:03am
You shouldn’t stay with someone who’s embarrassed to be with you. Be with someone who lets you be yourself, and let’s you express yourself. Be you, and if that’s not good enough for them, then don’t stay with them.
Anonymous
October 3rd, 2018 8:52am
Acceptance is the fundamental key to any Relationship. If your partner is embarassed then they must bring the awareness within them to support and uplift you , rather than judging you. However don't force them to accept you. Be kind to their view but slowly try to bring the harmony in non judgmentent and acceptance attitude towards each other. Keep them space to let them grow too. Meanwhile it is very important to not feel guilty and blame yourself. If you did some mistake , acknowledge that with kindness. And Make an effort to improve upon it. Even ask your partner to help. Mutual growth is very necessary amd important.
Anonymous
October 5th, 2018 9:16pm
Have they talked to you about what makes them embarrassed of you? Maybe they don't know how to communicate what exactly is making them embarrassed. What do you think you have been doing to make them embarrassed of you. Is it in public or when you are just simply with friends or family. Sometimes asking the peers that are around you that your boyfriend/girlfriend hang with or talk to if they have said anything to them about it. They might be able to tell you and you can talk about it with your partner possibly.
SaltWaterSoul
November 21st, 2018 5:38pm
Do you know they are embarrassed by you? Is it possible that you are misunderstanding something in their actions? If they are genuinely embarrassed, then you are in a toxic relationship and they are not worthy of being in a relationship with you. Please don’t settle for anyone that thinks you are anything less than wonderful, and someone to be proud of. Have an honest conversation to make sure you aren’t misunderstanding their actions. Then, and I know this doesn’t sound easy, but end the relationship if she is embarrassed by you. Remember, that says far more about who she is than who you are.
Caroline878
November 21st, 2018 11:55pm
Firstly try to find a way to understand and remind yourself that there is nothing to be embarrassed about. You are a human being and therefore amazing in your own right. In addition, try speaking to your partner. Understand why they feel this way and tell them that it’s not fair, healthy or supportive. Be open and honest and aim to give them an understanding of where you are coming from and how it makes you feel. Talk to someone who can offer support and guidance to help you through this period and remember that you are an absolutely miraculous creation!
yourpeacefulpal
December 6th, 2018 2:54pm
A little self-examination is always a good place me to start. Am I doing anything that's truly embarrassing? If so is it something I'm willing to change. Once I've decided the answer to those questions then I'll sit down with my partner and we can talk about it. If my partners' request is legitimate (stinky breath, unwashed clothes) then I'll decide if it's something I'm willing to change. If my partners' request is unreasonable or controlling then further dialogue is gonna need to happen. We have to love people where they are and if your partner can't except you without a ton of stipulations, it's not a healthy relationship. Remember, being alone and being lonely are not the same thing. Don't let people make you feel as though you're some sort of desperate spinster just because you're spending time learning to love yourself.
Anonymous
January 19th, 2019 6:36pm
If there embarrassed of you then they don’t have the right to be with you, or just altogether deserve to be with you. A girlfriend/ boyfriend shouldn’t be embarrassed of you, they should show you off, and value you. You shouldn’t be with someone who can’t realize how special and valuable you are. Or how lucky they are to have you, not how disfortunate it is. Not only do they need to value you but they need to respect you and your feelings and by being embarrassed of you, they’re not doing either of those. But most of all don’t let them put a price value to you.