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My dad likes to touch me. Is this sexual abuse?

272 Answers
Last Updated: 12/23/2021 at 6:04am
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Top Rated Answers
SpiderHug
May 21st, 2018 8:37am
I'm a dad and I like to touch my children. Mostly their hair and smell them, get a reminiscence of that baby smell they had when I held them and tried to comfort them. Now they are all grown-ups or adolescent, and don't like too much physical contact anymore, especially the boys. They rather try to have a pretend fight or a wrestle . It's all fine by me. I grew up in a family with sexual child abuse (not a victim, not a perp) and this is something that affects me deeply. Nobody is responsible for the way they feel. I suppose pedophiles are scared of the way they feel if they can' t talk about it. I wouldn't be scared. Because I know the deep lifelong scar it leaves on someone's soul. And I'd rather cut my own ... off than inflict that to anyone. What really festered however in my family was the secrecy. Nobody talked. As a result , I really think that everybody was contaminated, even the ignorant bystanders. That's what needs to happen. I you suffer or feel uncomfortable, talk. If you witness something that makes you uncomfortable, talk. If you are scared that what you doing is wrong, talk. I suppose also that kids , growing in a healthy family, experience a form of pleasure from the touch of their parents. It might not be that easy to relive that feeling when growing as an adult. But then again, if a kid express discomfort from a parent's touch, any parent should be able to hear it and change his own behaviour to protect his child. So talk to your dad. To other people, too. Insist on your own feelings not what you think others are thinking.
Anonymous
July 10th, 2016 12:46am
If the manner of which he is touching you is sexual, then yes. This type of physical contact is completely inappropriate.
Anonymous
July 24th, 2016 3:36pm
I wouldn't know for sure because I'm not the one in the situation however if you have a hunch that it is please contact a sexual hotline
UniqueHeart
August 25th, 2016 12:56am
In what way does he touch you? If you feel uncomfortable with the way he touches you and you believe it's inappropriate than you should report it.
Kat140615xx
September 18th, 2016 3:15pm
Yeah if he is touching you in sexual way yes that is sexual abuse, if he is only touching your arm, or giving you a hug nope.
sweetnutella
October 16th, 2016 2:23am
It depends. But you have to distinguish between sexual abuse and an expression of love from your dad. I mean, if he likes to touch your hair, wipe your cheeks gently, I think this must be one of the way to show his love. But if he starts to touch your thighs, your chest, and all of those sensitive parts of your body, you must be aware! This could be the indicate of sexual abuse.
tranquilJewel64
February 23rd, 2017 4:04am
That was a very vague question because I do not know in what way your "dad" is touching you. If he is touching you in your private areas then yes, that is sexual abuse. If he is pinching your buttocks or grabbing your breasts, that is also sexual abuse. If your "dad" is talking to you in a sexual way or showing you sexually graphic pictures or movies, that too is sexual abuse. If you have gone to your mother and she either does not believe you, is not present in the home or in your life, or becomes abusive to your for trying to get help, please, either go to a relative that you can trust, go to a school counselor and let them know what is happening in your home or if you feel you are old enough, call the police yourself from another location outside of your home. This is a very serious situation, so please if you are being abused tell someone.
Anonymous
March 5th, 2017 1:44pm
Any sexual acts that isn't wanted or giving permission is a form of sexual abuse. That is if the person that is doing these acts are gaining pleasers from the act. And the victim isn't willing or doesn't understand what is right or wrong. Sexual Abuse comes in many ways and forms and its best to understand what to look for and here is a link https://www.7cups.com/forum/SexualAssaultSupport_96/Resources_364/SexualAbuseAssaultFacts_25764/
AthenaD39
March 8th, 2017 2:46am
If it's more than a hug or a kiss on the cheek, then, yes, it's abuse. I would refer you to a professional for this though.
Anonymous
April 5th, 2017 12:04pm
As we are always told as kids there are two types of touches, good touch and bad touch. We need to know how to differentiate between both. Some people show their affection by touching, some people are just generally touchy so we need understand the motive but should not rule out bad intention all together.
LetsTalkandChill
April 16th, 2017 8:08am
As we were taught during our childhood, do not let anyone touch you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable. If something doesn't feel right, there probably is something wrong with the situation. Is it something you can share with your mother to get insight? There's always help from professionals that you can seek to get support if you don't feel comfortable sharing. But remember, there is someone who is gonna get you the help you need - you just need to seek out!
wonder22
April 19th, 2017 10:14pm
Not unless he's touching you sexually. Hugging & ect. isn't sexual, but if it is, call the sexual abuse hotline.
Anonymous
April 23rd, 2017 1:50am
If you don't like it or say no and he keeps doing it, then yes. Seek help immediately to stop this behavior or try telling him to stop. Please don't let this continue if you don't want it to happen. Best of luck.
tjb28
July 26th, 2017 9:07pm
Depending on where he's touching you and without you saying yes if he is touching you down below (private parts) Then yes that is sexual abuse and you may have to tell someone
Anonymous
August 10th, 2017 7:40pm
If he likes to touch you in inappropriate areas, it is considered sexual. If it feels sexual and awkward to you, and sometimes you don't like it, you shouldn't pretend to ignore it because that isn't okay either. Cuddling and sleeping with your child is okay till a certain age. After that it can become much more sexual than beforehand. I'd talk with your mom about this (if you can). She might have some insight.
siluna22
November 9th, 2017 11:02pm
If he is touching you in areas that make you feel uncomfortable and they are areas that should not be touched. Then it might be sexual abuse. Please talk with another guardian about this! Don’t stay quiet.
creativePalm12
November 15th, 2017 7:42am
Unfortunately, based on the description you've give in your question, it would be impossible to give a conclusive and responsible answer to your question. "My dad likes to touch me" could mean so many things, so to draw any conclusions just on that would be dangerous. If you were able to talk to someone privately and maybe explain his actions more, you might be able to get a better idea of what's going on.
Anonymous
November 15th, 2017 6:06pm
No sweetheart, that's molestation and could lead into rape. Make some calls because you don't need to be in that surrounding.
cherishedLight73
November 17th, 2017 7:25am
YES! if you are being touched in any way that you do not want to be that is inappropriate then yes! If you have a disability that prevents you from performing certain person tasks that hes helping you with then no. Bit if it goes beyond performing said task and makes you uncomfortable report him!
Anonymous
November 17th, 2017 8:22am
It depends on where he likes to touch you. If he touches you on shoulder, hand etc then it is sign of affection in most cultures. But if he likes to touch you on your private parts then it is sexual abuse
Amy890
November 19th, 2017 8:06pm
Depends in what kind of way and what parts of your body. If his touch makes you feel uncomfortable and he knows it but he does it anyway it's definitely abuse. You should try to talk to him or at least to other members of your family, teachers, authorities about this situation. You don't have to accept any kind of touch which makes you feel uncomfortable.
Anonymous
November 30th, 2017 8:47am
If it involves the touching of intimate areas and/or it makes you uncomfortable and you have asked him to stop but he does not, then it is sexual abuse. It is advisable to confront him if that has not been done already or otherwise speak to a trusted adult such as a family member or professional, like a social worker.
Anonymous
December 6th, 2017 5:36pm
I think you need to talk a professional about this, I dont think I am qualified to talk about this but yes to me it sounds inappropriate
bleuvide
December 14th, 2017 4:55pm
Yes it is. It is way more difficult to aknowledge the abuse and live through it when it's a member of the family being the abuser. If your father takes advantage of his situation of 'power' towards you in a sexual way, it is definitely abuse.
Junar
December 16th, 2017 12:23pm
That depends on what the purposes that touch and depends on your feeling when he touches you. If you're feeling uncomfortable with his touch then it might be a sexual abuse, but if you think it's a safe touch for example just touching your hair.
Debatablebean1789
December 21st, 2017 11:49pm
If it is sexual then yes it is. If your father is making you or doing things sexual to you then this is illegal and you need to report it. If you feel uncomfortable reporting it, talk to a trusted adult or listener and they can give you advice on what to do.
Anonymous
January 6th, 2018 6:07pm
It depends on where he touches you and how you feel in return/ Do you feel violated? Do you feel like he touches you somewhere he shouldn't?
Anonymous
January 11th, 2018 6:33am
as long as it is not sexually, or in places you feel uncomfortable in, not really. speak to him and see, if he still continues inappropriately, please do not hesitate to report him.
Anonymous
January 13th, 2018 10:46pm
normal phsyical affection can be a great thing, but physical contact that makes you feel uncomfortable is probably not ok. If you think the touching is abusive, then you should get professional help from a teacher, police, doctor/nurse, or someone who can help intervene. You deserve respect.
Chimmysmallz
January 18th, 2018 12:39pm
To answer your question properly, I would first like to explain what sexual abuse is. Sexual abuse is a situation in which an individual is touched either on their genitalia, between their thighs, their breast or made to touch the other individual in the same places without the individual fully willing to participate in such. Sexual abuse can occur with any member of the family,friends, neighbours and/or strangers. If a person gets touched inappropriately, the person being touched is never at fault. So whenever people say "you dress sexually or you were always giving him signs that you want it" these are just wrong. Back to your question. If you feel within yourself that the way your father is touching you is wrong, tell him that you don't like it. Most people that abuse others say things like "you like it, you are just pretending" or "if you tell anyone I will kill you" or "if you tell your mom, she wouldn't believe you". I do not know how he touches you but sometimes, the way someone touched you even if it is a minor touch of the fingers can trigger warning feeling in you. Talk to a trusted objective adult about this and remember, even if he is actually sexually abusing you, it is not your fault. It never will be. X