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My family seems to hate my significant other. What can I do?

20 Answers
Last Updated: 03/06/2018 at 4:14am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jamitia Wilson, MS, LAC

Pre-Licensed Professional

I believe that true healing occurs when one is able to honestly express how one feels about himself/herself and the world. I would be honored to support your healing change.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
November 8th, 2014 10:47pm
I've been in that exact situation. First, you need to make sure to look at the situation through everyone's eyes. Is there something wrong with how your s/o treats you or the people around them? Ask around. If nothing comes up, or it seems like your family is the only people who hate your s/o, you can assume it's personal. Ask your family why they don't like your s/o. If it's because they don't suck up to or aren't intimidated by your family, or because they are standing up to abuse against you, then you can rest assured your family doesn't have any valid reasons not to like them. Personally, my solution was to leave home, but I was being abused. Everyone's situations are different though. So please talk to a professional before making any decisions.
paigebaker
October 10th, 2014 6:33pm
tell them how you feel about your significant other and try to tell them how you feel about them hating them
share
October 15th, 2014 5:19pm
I would try talking to family members one at a time and ask why he or she feels this way. I would ask questions such as do you know something about my significant other than I do not? If not, why not take the opportunity to really get to know him before you make a decision. Keep in mind, I love him so if you don't like him please at least be kind.
JustLizzie
October 15th, 2014 7:04pm
Ask them why and go from there. Talk to them and prove to them why your significant other is an amazing human being.
AnnieElen
October 26th, 2014 7:44pm
It's your life! Maybe they will have to deal with it. If you like him/her, then you can stick with him/her! This is your choice, not your family's
Pandette
October 27th, 2014 2:22am
Hmm, that must feel like a hefty burden to take on. Have you tried speaking to your family members to figure out why the may hate your significant other? Sometimes the best way to go about a situation like this is through communication. :)
thoughtfulstudent89
November 2nd, 2014 4:37pm
Sit them down and calmly talk things out. Recognize their points of view, but also establish your own. Everyone is allowed to have an opinion. We all have a right to share our points of view. But we also have to be respectful and fair of one another. Especially loved ones.
thesomebodytoknow
November 5th, 2014 7:52pm
I understand. The most you can do is try and make peace. Ask your family why they feel that way. Try and be the peace keeper. It'll take time for things to blow over but I'm sure if you figure out why your family hates your S/O.
fromthesea
November 9th, 2014 12:35pm
You can ask them about it. You never know until you ask. And when they answer, you can either accept that your family and your significant other don't get along as much as you would want or you could talk about it with all of them together and try to find a solution.
Anonymous
November 9th, 2014 9:34pm
Approach your family about it, without your significant other and ask them exactly how they feel. If they seem to dislike him/her, you should ask why.
Uniqueg
November 13th, 2014 11:35pm
That's a tough one, sometimes you can't force these situations. Try to let your family know how important your significant other is to you and ask your significant other to do the same.
Anonymous
November 15th, 2014 5:59pm
There's probably a reason why,try listening to they reasons, take it from there, might change things
904shirts
November 19th, 2014 7:10pm
There are so many people in need whom we could be thinking about instead of ourselves. And please don’t ever forget your own family, your own wife. There are so many ways we could be serving. We have no time to become absorbed in ourselves
Anonymous
June 23rd, 2015 2:22pm
Think is there a reason for why they hate the significant other. Is there a reason? But other than that don't mind them. Its your significant other not theirs. SO their opinion shouldnt matter. But maybe talk to them about why
Anonymous
March 22nd, 2016 2:03am
Family acceptance can be a troubling issue as sometimes our family may not like someone we are friends with or someone we date. Speaking to your family about the positive things you partner has done and the positive things about them can clear things about the perception your family has. Sometimes however you need to give a family time. Time can heal all worries. My own family didn't accept my partner for 2 years, but after many ocassions where they met and spoke and I constantly gave them stories about how positive my partner is, they began warming up. Take your time, it will be alright.
Anonymous
March 29th, 2016 1:13pm
This is of course a very difficult situation and I feel for you. My suggestion is to talk it out with them and find out their reasons for it. Get an understanding of what it is they do not like about the partner. Truth is they do not have to like each other but at least they should be able to be civil
Greatlistener87
June 7th, 2016 6:36am
Find out why they hate him/her and let them get to know him/her more in that aspect. Help to also explain and talk to your family on why he/she is that way and how they can build a better relationship with him/her.
ReaderHannah
October 3rd, 2017 6:08pm
While some people's opinions just won't change, you can try and talk to your parents and see why they don't like your significant other. Say they don't like him because he/she smokes. Maybe you could ask your significant other to not smoke before or during visiting them to reduce that. If there isn't a reason like that, such as a general disliking, then you'll have to hope your love for them or your time with them will change their opinion.
Anonymous
December 12th, 2017 3:42pm
As a person who has been in the same situation, you can only do what you choose. It is not our responsibility to force another person to like another. You love the person that you love, another person, family included, cannot dictate your decisions, and that includes the people that love us, and whom we love.
earsandsoul
March 6th, 2018 4:14am
Ask your significant other to engage in some activity, hobby that some of your family shares. This way they can have at least some common ground to relate to