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What do I do if my father thinks I hate him even after I told him I don't?

221 Answers
Last Updated: 12/12/2021 at 10:05am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Melissa Strauss, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I am client focused and believe everyone has a strength. I feel confident in seeing clients with generalized and social anxiety, depression and relational goals.

Top Rated Answers
miraculousBeauty49
August 4th, 2016 7:21pm
Try your best to show him instead. It sounds cliché but actions do speak louder than words sometimes.
LoverOfHappiness
August 6th, 2016 7:25am
This is where the saying 'Action speaks louder than words' come into play. Sometimes people need more than just the words to assure them. And even actions sometimes don't help, but be patient and keep showing the love.
NumberEleven
August 6th, 2016 9:38am
It could be that he interprets your actions as being a consequence of his actions, or maybe he's feeling guilty about something that he did?
Anonymous
August 6th, 2016 7:14pm
Sit down and talk to him truthfully and respectfully. Explain your worries and feelings and try to negotiate.
AboveAndBelow
August 6th, 2016 9:33pm
Maybe do something to show him just how much you care, and try to reinforce the fact that you don't hate him by doing little things as often as possible.
Anonymous
August 7th, 2016 7:43am
Help your dad understand how much you love him. Appreciate him more and thank him for all the things he does.
Anonymous
August 17th, 2016 5:56pm
Try to spend more time with him, show him that you love him it can be with little things like a hug or just a simple I love you.
Patty24
August 17th, 2016 7:03pm
Find out why he thinks that way so this thought can be changed. Then, just continue to show him love and respect.
Anonymous
August 19th, 2016 8:55pm
I'm my opinion, you should show him some love and get closed to him. Whenever you see him, just pass a smile, it'll work. 😊
patientFriend96
August 21st, 2016 12:10am
All you can do in this situation is to keep reassuring him that you love him and eventually he will understand. Some people it takes constant repeating to get them to understand what you mean:)
Love2Help07
August 21st, 2016 3:25pm
I would have shown him love care and respect through my doings. Would have made him feel how special he is and how lucky i am to have him as my father.
beautifulyou28
August 21st, 2016 4:01pm
Let him feel what you are saying is true. Actions speak louder than words. Express love and compassion
alexsupporting
August 24th, 2016 4:15am
Instead of telling him, you should show him. By making something heartfelt for him or showing you remember his favorite things.
compassionateBubbles38
August 24th, 2016 12:46pm
Sometimes actions speak louder than words. Perhaps showing him, rather than telling him might help change things.. Mostly importantly don't blame yourself.
healingRose67
August 24th, 2016 3:28pm
Little things. Make him his favorite cup of tea. Ask him about his day. Make him feel loved. Actions speak louder than words but I find that they make a perfect combination.
crunchygranola
August 25th, 2016 3:04pm
Keep assuring him that you do love him and take a bit of extra effort to connect with him. Whether it's spending more time or just showing him you appreciate him via text / call. Take that extra step for him, it'll go for miles.
Anonymous
August 26th, 2016 12:33am
Ask you father why he thinks that and reassure him and give him facts as to why you don't! Talking things out helps
beautifulSpace43
August 27th, 2016 10:57am
Show him that you really love him :) It's not only words that show how much we care about someone , it's actions
EsmeRose
September 1st, 2016 6:22pm
You could try to earn his trust. You could do this by going out somewhere with him, maybe even just doing a simple favour such as making him coffee or doing a chore for him. Or perhaps sit him down and ask why he thinks that. Communication is key.
GuidingLight1492
September 4th, 2016 4:24am
Maybe you can look for ways to show him how much you love him? You can buy him a gift or do something that he will like to show your love and appreciation for him.
Anonymous
September 4th, 2016 9:41am
Do things to show him that you love him like cooking his favourite meal or do something he likes doing!
MrsF
September 4th, 2016 2:52pm
Show him with your actions. Words can only go so far sometimes. Help him when help is needed. Your efforts will be seen and felt.
Anonymous
September 7th, 2016 1:52am
I would do small things such as watching my tone or body language around him and assure him throughout the week that you care about his well being.
thoughtfulPomegranate86
September 7th, 2016 4:45am
Actions speak much louder than words, prove to him that you do not hate him by being nice and showing him you love him
RobRH
September 7th, 2016 7:08pm
You should try to engage in an open discussion about this. Perhaps writing a letter or message would make it easier to discuss everything
Anonymous
September 15th, 2016 1:44am
Try to do something to show your father you love him, something that means a lot to him in a moment like this.
Anonymous
September 16th, 2016 2:25pm
Ask him why he thinks you hate him or why he feels that way about his daughter or why he thinks his daughter would hate him.
TheTripleS719
September 17th, 2016 7:19am
Work through whatever issues you've had with him, whether you think they're small or big. Something that doesn't seem major to you could mean the world to him. It's going to take time and lots of effort, but the end result is beautiful.
ForVanGogh
September 21st, 2016 7:37pm
Sometimes it is easier to believe in actions than in words. Try to demonstrate to your father that you loves him. You can choose a few things to do with/for him. Even when it seems small and insignficante, just do it with care.
lacedaniellehelp17
September 23rd, 2016 12:27am
Have a long discussion about him. You need to know fully about why he feels this way. Maybe he has things he's dealing with and insecurities himself.