Why can't I please my parents?

12 Answers
Last Updated: 11/13/2018 at 5:15pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Ken Thom, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I believe that emotional dys-regulation is the underlying cause of all mental health challenges. I help people regulate their emotions and then begin their healing journey

Top Rated Answers
February 17th, 2015 6:56pm
They may just have high expectations. If you try your hardest to please them, they'll see that you care about what they expect of you, and they'll respect that.
April 28th, 2015 3:08am
Figure out what you want from life and then let the know. Come up with a plan to achieve it and they will believe it.
July 14th, 2015 10:42pm
Parents are hard to please often, mainly because they expect so much of you, often extremely unrealistic. However, this does not mean that they aren't proud of you. Sometimes, parents hide their emotions but will show it in little ways like giving you a present, money, doing something nice for you etc. Some people find it helps to tell their parents how they feel about the way that they act towards them so that their parents have a better understanding of the way that they react towards their parents and it sometimes helps them to realise what their actions are doing. I hope this information helps.
June 2nd, 2015 4:39am
Because they know you and know that you can be the best person in this world they will always want you being a big person is a exhausting way to live but they will always expect best to you.
August 10th, 2015 4:36pm
Some times it's hard to please parents because they have a set of values and beliefs that are not shared. They want to make their dreams there children dreams because they could not live up to theirs.
September 7th, 2015 2:09pm
hi, I am one of the listeners. In what sense you can't please your parent? and why do you think you don't please them?
November 30th, 2015 4:54pm
Parents are very hard to please. There always asking more of you, but I want you to know that they love and care for you! And they just want you to do your best!
November 30th, 2015 11:12pm
Parents generally view their children as an extension of themselves, and therefore put the sometimes perfectionist beliefs they have of themselves on others. It's not anything you are doing, but rather what they are thinking and feeling.
April 19th, 2016 6:07pm
I don't know if this fits into your problem but from my experience some parents have an idea of their children from the child's birth. They make expectations that their children can't or don't feel like they should follow. Maybe your parents have similar expectations and they're trying to fit you into a mold that you don't fit in.
July 18th, 2016 11:57am
It's literally impossible to please everyone all the time, your parents included. They are of a different generation and so have different values, perspectives, expectations and dreams. All parents do the best job they can
August 1st, 2016 3:59pm
Parental expectations often conflict with our own desires. This may be because our interests and strengths do not match what our parents' expectations, or possibly what their "vision" of who they wanted you to be aligns with our own. The best course of action is to keep an open dialogue
November 13th, 2018 5:15pm
I believe this happens in most cases because 1) Our parents, like us, are also imperfect individuals and 2) because they're constantly thinking about what's right for their children. While they do love us unconditionally, they also tend to expect us to thrive in the kind of environment they've imagined or hoped we would thrive in. They like to see us doing things or achieving things they hoped we would. And at often times, this is what leads us to thinking we are unable to please them no matter what we do. To sum it up, we can't please our parents not because we're not enough, but because sometimes, they expect a little too much from us. But then again, what I just stated is not relevant in every situation.