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Why can't they understand what I'm saying?

20 Answers
Last Updated: 07/21/2020 at 10:54pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
Moderated by

Smita Joshi, BA Psychology / MA / Advanced EFT Practitioner


I am empathetic with my Clients going through emotional overwhelm and passionate in helping them. I am supportive, openminded & interactive in helping my clients.

Top Rated Answers
February 24th, 2015 9:15pm
Not everyone goes through the same things in life. For instance, even if 100 people we're to go through the same exact problem at the same exact time, we would all take it differently. Just like all humans our different, they way we react and handle situations are distinctive too. We may be able to empathize and understand but never to the extent of the person who faced it.
March 2nd, 2015 2:19am
They can't understand what I'm saying because they're not able to look at my problem from my perspective.
September 28th, 2015 5:46am
Speak soft words and hard arguments. That's best you can do. If they still don't understand, then maybe they are at different intellectual level than yours. So, first try to bridge that gap.
November 22nd, 2016 5:08pm
A lot of people ask this question. I think the only knowledgeable answer is that: They have not had the same experience. They haven't been through what you had to struggle through. Thus, they do not understand.
April 13th, 2015 5:14pm
Sometimes people don't understand what is being said is because they hear but aren't listening.The only way to understand is to listen.
March 8th, 2016 9:51pm
Because you dream too big and they think too small. You are extraordinary in your own way and so brilliant that anyone less than that isn't able to understand.
April 24th, 2015 3:05am
They most likely can't understand what you're saying because they haven't gone though the experience. Nobody around me understand my problems because they are either too wrapped up in their problems or because they don't know what exactly I'm going through. Please, go to someone you know have had experience of your problems, or know it very well, most likely a therapist, to vent about it.
May 6th, 2015 7:01pm
Because they don't know what you have been through so it's hard for them to understand. They may try to help but in actuality they can't. The only ones who can help are the people who know what you're going through.
June 17th, 2015 4:11am
"First seek to understand and then to be understood" Understand why they don't understand it might be because they don't know your situation well, or because you don't say stuff clear enough, maybe you don't put emotion into it.
July 21st, 2015 7:49pm
Sometimes people can only understand what they've experienced personally. That's why it helps to find people who have been through the same kind of struggles to help you understand yourself and others.
September 14th, 2015 1:55am
There are several reasons which most of them reflect back to us. It's either their literally don't understand us in a sense that they have never experienced what we are going through or they just simply don't care to even try to understand. However, there are people who really really would love to understand us and help us. But we don't know how to express our feelings and what we are going through. Plus, more often than not, we don't understand what we are going through too. Sometime we even assumed from the start that they don't understand us and push everybody out completely. It is understandable. And it is also understandable if people find it hard to accept this answer because it involves ourselves. We also play a big part in getting or helping people to understand us.
April 19th, 2016 9:49pm
Sometimes people don't really understand what you are trying to say or don't get where you're coming from. Try explaining it to them in a different way.
September 27th, 2016 9:52pm
Sometimes things are huge, confusing and not quite meant to be understood immediately. Maybe some time, space to consolidate and ponder on how you think and feel is needed maybe? Itll come when its ready, thats okay...
January 30th, 2017 1:16am
People have a different way of thinking and understanding , Its kind of how our world works . We often say something in our own language and if people translate it in their own , its more often likely to be wrong or grammatically incorrect which would destroy the meaning
July 18th, 2017 4:32pm
They may just be unable to really think about what you're saying. Some people don't listen well to what others are saying. There may be a miscommunication between you and whoever you are referring to.
July 21st, 2020 10:54pm
Unfortunately in life, not everyone has empathy to put view things from the perspectives of others. Some individuals lack the emotional intelligence to be a listening ear. And in some cases, these people don't seem to understand what you say (or have selective listening) because the things you bring up make them feel uncomfortable about things they see in themselves as well. A great way to get people to understand you is to fully understand yourself and the ideas floating around your head first. It really helps to keep your ideas and thoughts on a journal and flesh them out through writing. That way, you can understand your ideas better and present them to others as well.
August 3rd, 2015 7:06am
Because they haven't lived through your circumstances. You have a different way of thinking and an overall different mindset. That's not a bad thing; it just means you'll need to explain a bit more.
March 21st, 2016 6:02am
People understand different things depending on how they know to. Its best if you can explain in detail what you are trying to say to avoid confusion or miss communication.
July 26th, 2016 5:25am
At times we want to protect ourselves from getting hurt, so we calculate exactly what we may say to someone, and it is not necessarily the full story or enough information. For that reason it causes confusion for the other party leading them to think you are acting dramatic or attention seeking, when you are clearly not. It is definitely scary to open up to people, but you are going to have to allow at least one person in and take a chance.
February 13th, 2018 9:04pm
There Could be the second language, could be noise, different perception, physical disability, mental disability or just a jerk.