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Why do I always think my husband is cheating on me?

194 Answers
Last Updated: 05/19/2022 at 2:13pm
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Top Rated Answers
sillyseraph002
April 27th, 2018 10:14pm
fear of infidelity can be very difficult to cope with. sometimes the fear can be as bad as the experience itself. but there exist more than one possible answer to this question. since i dont know you personally, and i do not know your husband either, i can only speculate. it could be anxiety on your part, especially if you have been betrayed by several people in the past, whether romantically or not. history is said to be a good teacher, and when we are repeatedly betrayed, we tend to "learn" that the people we love will eventually either leave or prove not to be deserving of our trust. the other possibility of course, is that he is; maybe youve smelled a perfume or hes stayed out late a few more times this month than usual. maybe youve picked up a few cues, and youve become unable to stay in denial. either way, a good first step is to reach out to people who know you and whose opinions and perspectives you trust.
Anonymous
August 17th, 2018 2:37pm
Sometimes people are insecure about themselves and it's often insecurity and low self-esteem that causes these types of thoughts in the first place. When you don't feel good about yourself, it can cause you to feel like you're not good enough for him and that he might be wanting to find better, elsewhere. Most of the time these thoughts aren't true. Unless your husband has given you a reason to think he has/would cheat on you, then it might be a good idea to try and find ways to help you cope with your insecurities. Also, good communication is key, make sure to talk to him and ask him his thoughts/feelings about you thinking these things.
Laks1
August 5th, 2016 9:33pm
If you always think your husband is cheating on you then you don't trust him enough to believe he can be faithful. Sometimes its also about how you see yourself. When you think you are not good enough or beautiful enough, it makes you think he is out there cheating on you with other people who are better
Anonymous
June 30th, 2016 3:44am
You are jealous, and it is a natural instinct when you are heads over heels in love with someone. You could also be afraid of him leaving you (maybe you have been cheated on in the past) and this makes you insecure and afraid.
Livelovedream18
June 1st, 2018 11:58pm
You can always talk to me about it and maybe I'll be able to help you. But please don't do anything before you know the truth.
Anonymous
July 17th, 2016 8:10pm
Your paranoia and lack of trust results in that,and not knowing where your husband is,if he goes misteriously for no reason outside,you might think he is cheating,but you should show trust for your partner,and have a healthy and understanding relationship,dont let your fear affect that.
Victoriaalexandraa
June 10th, 2016 10:51pm
I imagine your concerns are based on his actions, and if so you need to be open and discuss things with him. This is someone you loved to the point of committing yourself to them in marriage so you owe it to each other to have a chat if one person feels things are less than perfect.
Anonymous
July 1st, 2016 4:53am
He may deem traits that seem untrustworthy to you. Always confront the feelings that arise because it can cause problems later.
mxnrcd
July 8th, 2016 8:11pm
Maybe it's because you don't love yourself enough and you know that there are better girls around, so you may be scared that he finds out and leaves you, but don't be, if he's with you, there is nothing to be scared about ;)
Anonymous
June 5th, 2016 12:39pm
Because you don't trust him, why would you marry someone you don't trust to begin with ? Maybe it's time to have a serious discussion with him or part away if you can't ? Separation isn't a failur.
allnaturalUnicorns70
September 1st, 2016 3:04pm
Let's assume he isn't for now (though that feeling might be a sign that something is off in your marriage), you might feel neglected, like he isn't giving you enough time and attention. You might be jealous of his otherwise innocent interactions with other women. Either way, it might be worth thinking about yourself, and then having a polite and non-accusatory conversation about your feelings with him. Good luck!
Tanushree11
October 26th, 2018 9:44am
You might be having a past relationship in which your partner cheated you, that leads to person subconsciously worry that your present one is cheating you too. You can improve this by working on self love and confidence. When you doubt yourself, you might feel that you are not good enough, so that makes you think that your husband might be 'seeing someone better' another thing that can be done is to talk to him about it, and he'll clear any misunderstanding or doubt you have. Talking about the things that worry you or affects your relationship is the key.
wickedDahlia33
August 23rd, 2018 2:51am
Either deep down you know something doesn't feel quite right or you've been hurt before which makes it hard to trust again. Either way, both are valid responses, but the question is which one is it? When my husband cheated he acted guilty over small things. But when we were working through it I was still convinced he was cheating. It turns out he wasn't but the damage was done. Asking is the only way to truly find out. Then depending on his answer, you can either choose to believe him and work on the root cause of your distrust or investigate further.
Anonymous
August 27th, 2016 6:31am
is there anything that makes you sure of it? because sometines its onlt the thoughts that troubles us
Angel1011208
May 15th, 2020 1:18pm
Maybe you have been through something similar with a past boyfriend, family member, friend, or colleague, so you are holding on to that and feeling like your husband might be unfaithful and out to hurt you. Another reason could be you are just feeling insecure in your relationship either of how strong the relationship is or of yourself and that's getting in the way of having mutual trust between the both of you. In any case, I think the best thing you can do is communicate. Communication is key in any relationship, so sit with your husband, no fighting, no shouting, and don't accuse him of anything just sit and say this is how I'm feeling can we talk about it and just go from there.
emmaTree123
April 1st, 2017 3:20am
Usually we tend to create anxiety because we overestimate the likely hood of these things happening and we underestimate our ability to handle them. Thinking your spouse is cheating is also common as it is a way to manifest our insecurities.
Asame
July 26th, 2018 1:41pm
You have a clear lack of trust towards him, you should talk to him about it. Maybe life has showed you lot of situations in which your trust was tested and you were let down. Communication is the key for a succesful relationship.
mintybunny
July 28th, 2016 10:03am
Think of any rational prof or reasoning behind why your husband may be cheating on you. If all of your reasoning is irrational, like you think he's cheating because you think you're ugly, it may be an issue of self esteem or a communication error.
Anonymous
July 23rd, 2016 1:05am
You might have been through a time in your life where your confidence and your trust was taken for granted. You should seek help from a doctor or psychologist to help you work through those feelings. Maybe, if you believe that you can talk to your partner, share those feelings with him but explain that you are trying to work through it. It comes from your trust being shaken in the past and it can be overcome.
Brittany8013
May 6th, 2018 9:37pm
If you fear your spouse is being unfaithful, there could be many reasons. Has there been any reason for you to doubt them? Has he broken your trust before? You could be feeling insecure in the realtionship for many reasons- you could be afraid of losing him to someone, you may not trust him completely, etc.
ladycat946
July 8th, 2016 1:22pm
Maybe it is because he has betrayed your trust in the past or someone cheated on you before and you are projecting yourself in that situation. Talk with him about your worries, so he will be able to understand you more and behave consequently about it.
ImaginaryPainting
October 26th, 2016 1:45pm
Do you think there is any communication problem or even lack of it between you two? Maybe you're not confident enough about yourself?
Anonymous
October 5th, 2016 4:08am
When thinking about one particular thought all the time interferes with our daily well-being, it's time to have an honest, open-minded, calm conversation - at least with ourselves, if not with other involved parties. Why do you think you feel your husband is always cheating on you? Consider having an open-minded conversation with your husband. When you're in private, say something like, "Hey, can I talk to you? I'm confused about something and just want to talk about it with you. I feel like you're cheating on me when you [what he does or doesn't do]." Be open-minded to his response. Perhaps have a conversation about why those actions make you feel that way, consider talking to him about how he can help you feel more secure. The best way to find an answer is to ask someone. If you are suspect that he is cheating after this conversation, ask calmly, "Are you cheating on me?" and observe the response and how you feel about the response initialy.
Anonymous
June 22nd, 2018 10:21pm
Sometimes, people are faced with situations that make them feel uncomfortable or worried. This may be one of those situations. You must truly love and care about your husband. Try having an open discussion with him. Don't forget to practice relaxation and breathing techniques!
Anonymous
December 6th, 2018 2:26pm
You are not alone in this thought. Many wifes do so. The true reason unfortunately or fortunately is not only on your husband account. You are a couple. Hence, all that is happened inside your couple is responsibility of both. The only way to resolve the issue is to start discuss the situation. Nobody can tell you single "true" about your story. It does not matter what you say or ask. "How" matters a lot. Try to avoid blaming your partner. Express your feelings and concerns. The answer or solution will come gradually through continuous discussion. It is hard to stay calm in such sensitive situation. But cold brain will help you on the way.
tomatensauce
April 4th, 2019 2:47pm
it might be that your had some bad experiences while trusting somebody. feeling jealous is a feeling that can help you to protect yourself to not be hurt. reacting jealous to earlier situation might have been a good tool to protect yourself. this reaction then becomes intuitive in situations where jealousy might not be productive. but if you are aware of you feelings, you can work on old learned reactions that might not be productive any more. are there also times where you do feel save in your relationship? have you ever talked to you husband about your feelings?
Quesadillaqueen12
May 19th, 2022 2:13pm
It seems like you are feeling a little paranoid. Its not an uncommon feeling to have. Many people have experienced this feeling of the significant other. Even I have felt this way plenty of times before. The best thing to do is to sit down and talk to your husband about what you are feeling. He may not take it the right way at first but remaining calm and sitting down is the best way to go. Maybe he can understand where youre coming from if you give me examples and then reasons why you would think he would cheat.
Anonymous
March 30th, 2019 9:25pm
It's a sense of insecurity within ourselves or something we've experienced in past relationships that brings us doubt. I remember when I was personally cheated on for the first time I thought I would never get over it or be able to trust again and partially, in a way I was correct. It's also little things they may do that may appear suspicious to you but it never means that they 100% are unless you've got proper evidence or proof in which you know for a fact that they are cheating on you. Most of the time however, it's because we underestimate ourselves and how good we are or can be compared to others that we may believe are better, leading us to be left with doubt about our importance to the other person.
youareablessing
January 27th, 2019 12:47pm
You may have such thoughts because you haven't spoken well with him in recent times. According to me, opening to the appropriate person is the best thing to ever do. Monitor keenly for a while and later talk with your husband face to face. Talk your heart out. And at the same time, be a good listener. Listen and understand to what he has to say. And when each of you have understood each other's feelings, sort things out together. But don't do it in a rush. Give it a time. Take your lone time too. Comprehend and then respond. Hope you find this helpful.
ChattyIntrovert1420
February 17th, 2019 3:11am
I say the biggest reason you think your husband is cheating is because you dont trust him. Regardless of what he has done it boils down to trust. Think of the reasons why the trust between you is broken. If you can find that answer you will either see more clearly that there is either a good chance he is cheating or perhaps see you have an over active imagination. Also have you tried asking him if he is or if he thinks about cheating. You may get a lie, but at least you can attempt to read his body language.