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Why do I always think my husband is cheating on me?

194 Answers
Last Updated: 05/19/2022 at 2:13pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Brooke Bowen, LPC

Counselor

I am nonjudgmental, supportive, and encouraging. I use an eclectic approach in order to empower you so you can have a happy and fulfilling future :)

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
January 28th, 2018 5:34pm
Why do you think that is how you feel? Has something happened before? Does he often text or see other women? Identify the surrounding factors and discuss them with your partner.
victoriadestiny
February 2nd, 2018 5:48pm
Have you heard of women's intuition? If you always think he is then it's a possibility that he is. Bring up the way you feel to him. If he gets defensive and aggressive or tries to change the subject then your assumptions might be right.
Anonymous
February 4th, 2018 8:29am
It could be your intuition or your instinct.Follow what it says..try finding out the truth yourself or trust him or try talking it out with him. thats the best way
sammyjamaican
February 4th, 2018 4:39pm
Has he behaved in a way that's caused you to think that, or are you insecure about something? Can you talk to him about this? If he hasn't done anything to suggest that he is cheating, you may want to look at yourself and examine your feelings a little more closely? Do you trust each other? Do you share things and communicate enough? Do you accuse him of cheating? Has he ever cheated? Have you ever cheated? Do you think of cheating? Sometimes we project our own feelings onto others.
Anonymous
March 1st, 2018 2:00am
You have to have trust in a relationship, ask him. If he says no leave it at that. Trust him. Also maybe try to go to couples therapy to build trust.
Anonymous
March 2nd, 2018 9:41pm
you might be scared that he will betray you because maybe someone in the passed did something hurtful to you
AthenaPanda
April 23rd, 2018 1:39pm
He may be out later than he normally is. He may be acting weird. Just talk to him about it. Tell him what you think is going on.
Anonymous
May 19th, 2018 5:52pm
Maybe because you don’t tryst him,Try talking to him about it and maybe see a therapist with your husband
mysteriousSunset61
May 23rd, 2018 11:17am
Most of the time, a situation like this stems from past experiences or situations. Open communication is a must in times like these and it really helps to avoid a mental toll on yourself. Keeping quiet is only going to agitate you further. Analyze your marriage, see if there were obvious red flags. Because sometimes it's not the other person's mistake but rather just misguided paranoia. It's better to know the truth whether it be ill or good than to live in a paranoid-fueled life and relationship.
MintedTea
May 24th, 2018 2:32pm
It's probably because you either have trust issues with him because he has cheated before, or you have past experience with cheating husbands. It's entirely okay to be suspicious or cautious with your partner in order to protect yourself, but being too suspicious can make him feel like you don't trust him enough. And trust is very important in a relationship.
bubblygrapefruit
May 27th, 2018 3:48pm
Sometimes we can have gut-feelings. Talk to your husband about these feelings openly and honestly and continue on from there. You can also get a marriage counsellor if you feel too uncomfortable or paranoid.
Anonymous
June 23rd, 2018 3:09pm
The prevalence of infidelity is so high in our media that we're exposed to the thought all the time. It's not surprising that we also tend to internalize this fear, because divorce rates are so high we assume that infidelity must be rampant. When you're in a long term committed relationship it's natural to have anxiety about the future and to question the strength of your bond with someone else. Because we spend so much time with our partners, it's easy to see changes in their everyday habits. These changes may be tied to their own anxiety about the future and may have nothing to do with infidelity. It's common to question our relationships and to feel anxious about the trust we bestow to loved ones - it's okay to be insecure sometimes. If you're worried about it constantly though, you need to talk to your partner and explain why you feel anxious. Once you openly communicate about the source of your insecurity, you can come up with a solution together.
Anonymous
June 25th, 2018 7:40am
Past experiences or insecurities play a role. Try to identify what triggers you and talk it through
warmPudding59
July 4th, 2018 9:32pm
There might be an underlying self-worth issue you might need to address. Try to think about it, what would it say about you if you found out that your husband cheated on you? Would your narration say more about you and your worth or more about him?
Rasasvada
July 12th, 2018 6:56pm
Think about it, does it stem from a trauma in the past? or are you insecure? If it is the former you have some unresolved feelings, let yourself feel those emotions and let go of it once done. If it's the latter then, what are you lacking? Work on those skills, weak areas and better yourself.
ramiamir001
July 14th, 2018 2:35pm
You might have trust issues because of earlier bad experiences with boyfriends, or your parents having a bad relationship or friends having bad relationships.
Shivam501
July 26th, 2018 11:56am
Because you may be not spending plenty of time with him. Try giving him some time and understand his emotional needs. If you'll be able to identify and resolve his emotional needs with your compassion than I am really sure he'll become more attractive towards you and hence you won't have thoughts of him cheating on you :)
Anonymous
August 11th, 2018 2:16am
I'm sorry that you think so, maybe its because 1-you, don't think you're enough for him, which is only your self-confidence. 2- you have been in a relationship where people have let you down.
Anonymous
August 11th, 2018 5:33pm
I'd suggest opening up to him about your worries, in a calm and collected manner, so that you both can sort through the problem together.
gentlesloth3
August 12th, 2018 4:01pm
You may have been hurt before in the past by a significant other being disloyal. Talk with your husband.
Electricityscvpe
August 15th, 2018 6:54am
Insecurity, you should talk with him about how do you feel and look for a solution. And start trusting him.
Anonymous
November 11th, 2018 6:48pm
jealousy stems from self insecurity. if you aren't confident in yourself, you often times don't see how your partner could love or care about you. this puts you into a thought spiral of "why me?" "why not someone else who's prettier/ smarter/ funnier?" the first step to overcoming jealousy is self confidence. also, prior suspicious behavior on his side can be a contributing factor, as well as your own desire to cheat. sometimes when you wish to do something you know is bad, you project it onto your partner to make yourself feel less guilty internally. but mostly its due to lack of self confidence.
SaltWaterSoul
November 16th, 2018 5:53pm
Has he cheated in the past? If the answer is yes, then it takes time (sometimes more than seems fair) to rebuild broken trust. If he hasn’t cheated, then you need to identify what makes you feel so insecure. Living with worry and insecurity are not healthy. Can you talk to him about your concerns? It can also be extremely helpful to seek professional help in these situations. Often, our minds get stuck in negative feedback loops. A skilled professional can help you identify the cause of your faulty thinking and give you skills and tools to replace the negative thoughts with healthy ones.
Anonymous
December 6th, 2018 2:26pm
You are not alone in this thought. Many wifes do so. The true reason unfortunately or fortunately is not only on your husband account. You are a couple. Hence, all that is happened inside your couple is responsibility of both. The only way to resolve the issue is to start discuss the situation. Nobody can tell you single "true" about your story. It does not matter what you say or ask. "How" matters a lot. Try to avoid blaming your partner. Express your feelings and concerns. The answer or solution will come gradually through continuous discussion. It is hard to stay calm in such sensitive situation. But cold brain will help you on the way.
embracewhatmaycome
December 13th, 2018 6:24pm
It sounds like you are not happy with your current level of communication with your husband. If there's no clear communication about your feelings, goals, and future, it may seem to you that he's hiding something from you. But just remember that your impression of him may be wrong. He may have no idea how you really feel. I suggest having a positive conversation with lots of laughs in order to vent your feelings fully. Being able to reconnect and understand each other's feeling can definitely help you get back on the right track in your relationship. I wish you the best of luck!
Happysam99
January 10th, 2019 1:34pm
This happens when your mind doesn't have an anwser to a certain situation. Your mind will try to find something that can fill in the blanks. It may be true, but it may also be false. There are more than 100 reasons to fill in these blanks. To prevent this type of thinking, you must focus on the present. Focus on the information that is given to you. Communication with your husband is the way to find out the truth. You can find the truth through his emotions and behavior. Communication is the most important part of a healthy relationship.
youareablessing
January 27th, 2019 12:47pm
You may have such thoughts because you haven't spoken well with him in recent times. According to me, opening to the appropriate person is the best thing to ever do. Monitor keenly for a while and later talk with your husband face to face. Talk your heart out. And at the same time, be a good listener. Listen and understand to what he has to say. And when each of you have understood each other's feelings, sort things out together. But don't do it in a rush. Give it a time. Take your lone time too. Comprehend and then respond. Hope you find this helpful.
ChattyIntrovert1420
February 17th, 2019 3:11am
I say the biggest reason you think your husband is cheating is because you dont trust him. Regardless of what he has done it boils down to trust. Think of the reasons why the trust between you is broken. If you can find that answer you will either see more clearly that there is either a good chance he is cheating or perhaps see you have an over active imagination. Also have you tried asking him if he is or if he thinks about cheating. You may get a lie, but at least you can attempt to read his body language.
AnisiaCocanMA
February 22nd, 2019 6:56pm
This can be a very unpleasant thought and for sure it is really hard for you to manage it! A very important aspect of relationships is communication. It should be sincere and mature about every aspect of your lives that you two want to discuss. If there aren't any real reasons for your thoughts it is possible to have them because your own insecurities related to various aspects of yourself and your life. If these thoughts are troubling your everyday activities or cause you continuous stress it would be helpful to address to a therapist, maybe a couple therapist.
Anonymous
March 30th, 2019 9:25pm
It's a sense of insecurity within ourselves or something we've experienced in past relationships that brings us doubt. I remember when I was personally cheated on for the first time I thought I would never get over it or be able to trust again and partially, in a way I was correct. It's also little things they may do that may appear suspicious to you but it never means that they 100% are unless you've got proper evidence or proof in which you know for a fact that they are cheating on you. Most of the time however, it's because we underestimate ourselves and how good we are or can be compared to others that we may believe are better, leading us to be left with doubt about our importance to the other person.