Why do my parents put so much more pressure on me then my siblings?
Last Updated: 07/09/2018 at 9:37pm
Lisa Groesz, PhD
With evidenced based therapies, we find the root of the problem together to implement solutions. We all face crises, transitions, or disorders at some time.
Top Rated Answers
It sounds to me like you feel you are being treated differently by your parents then the way they treat your siblings. Can you tell me what ideas you have had around this situation?
Parents really just want their children to succeed! By putting more pressure on you they just think that you can handle it and that you have the ability to do great things with your life.
It's different for each person sadly so it's hard to tell. For me, I know now that my mother always thought I would be the smart one, the hard worker and the one to go far so she pushed me a lot harder to make sure I became all that she expected.
I am older so they expected more from me then the younger ones. They wanted the younger ones to look up too me.
Having your parents place extreme pressure on you can be very frustrating and overwhelming, but at the same time, you really learn how to be an independent individual. Are you the oldest of your siblings? If this is the case, perhaps they feel that you can be a good role model for them and by forcing you to meet their high expectations for you, you can help your siblings to grow/develop. As difficult as this role may be for you, I think that you should treat it as an honor (though you should always take care of yourself emotionally by putting yourself first from time to time).
Depending on if you're the oldest of your siblings they may be doing this just because you're the oldest and they want you to set a good example for your younger siblings. Now, even if you're not older or if it has nothing to do with who's oldest and all. Maybe they think you're just needing extra help being told something. You never know. But don't take it personal, they're trying to help you out in this world. Your parents aren't out after you, they just want to help you.
It might be that they have much higher expectations for you. If they're putting more pressure on you, that means that they believe in your capability of achieving greater heights! It doesn't mean that they hate you or anything. But letting them know that sometimes the pressure can be too much is also required.
Parents aren't always fair. They want the best for you and if they believe that you are the strongest of your siblings, chances are that they will pressure you the most.
They may do this because they believe that you can achieve much more than what you're achieving currently. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, they must have a lot of confidence in your personal success and want you to strive for greatness to fulfil you're full ability.
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