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How do I let go of my past?

155 Answers
Last Updated: 12/31/2021 at 6:32am
How do I let go of my past?
1 Tip to Feel Better
India
Moderated by

Jui Shankar, Ph.D

Psychologist

My worldview offers a systems perspective that values diverse clients and their struggles. I believe supportive and nonjudgmental therapeutic relationships empower clients.

Top Rated Answers
AMomentInTime1830
August 6th, 2021 12:16am
Letting go of ones past is by far one of the hardest things to do, not only physically but mental and emotionally. Understanding your past and all in encompasses can be a challenging task and can seem pretty impossible. Thinking you are the way you are because of your past and letting it define who you’ve become. Try to figure out what your main struggle is in your present life, and what behaviour(s) come with it. How do these behaviours affect your life and what about that do you want to change. When we know what we don’t want it’s much clearer to determine what we DO want. The hard part is accepting that the past is the past, forgiving if yourself for the way you’ve managed to cope with it and then you can decide how you want the rest of your life to go. You can only control what you do now, not anything from the past. Make the commitment to yourself that you actively want to change and seek help to help you through your process of discovery, acceptance and forgiveness. We ARE NOT defined by our past, but our strength to grow from it and overcome it
madhunga8
September 8th, 2021 4:43am
We cannot change our past but what we can do is to try to work together to change the way we look at the past. In doing so we actually take the locus of control back to ourselves. No more external locus of control. We can look back at a particular event in the past and see it from our present time and get insights as to how we would want to believe about ourselves now with regards to that event. In doing so we come to understand that memories about past events can be looked at from a different perspective. When our perspectives change, the way we view a similar event in the future too changes. With us exercising greater control from within to experience and interpret and gain new insights towards that event. With positive insights and beliefs, we condition ourselves to a new positive belief about ourselves which then becomes a positive habit
Izzy274
September 11th, 2021 9:29pm
Letting go of the past can be an incredibly difficult thing to do, and a long journey to take. It may feel like no matter what you do, memories and feelings from the past keep resurfacing, and this can seriously affect your mental health and prevent you from living life to the fullest. Here are a few ideas, but different things work for different people, and I really hope you can find something that works well for you. One idea may be to reflect on and validate your feelings - it may be, that deep down there are emotions and feelings you have bottled up, and by reflecting on your emotions you can learn to process them and embrace them as you grow, even though this will be a difficult journey. Linking on from that, it may also help for some people to try to compartmentalize their thoughts as 'from the past', and actively make an effort to leave the negative emotions and feelings as part of the past, and not something that affects you now. Another idea, is if you are feeling a lot of negative emotions as a result of your past, try some new things to release those emotions - for example playing the drums to release those feelings. Another option you may also be able to try is to identify the root of what's making it difficult to move on - perhaps by identifying this you can begin to make steps to reduce the effect is having on your life. Another thing you could consider is talking to someone about it - whether it's a trusted family member/ friend or a professional, being able to vent can be so beneficial, even if it's hard to open up sometimes. Also, gaining a new perspective, or advice from a professional may help you to see new things about the situation which can help in your journey to moving on, and give you the tools you need to process and let go of your past. I really hope some of these ideas are useful to you, and that you're able to let go of what happened in your past eventually. There will be dark days when you're reminded of what happened, but I hope overall you can begin to move forwards towards a freer future.
Omathewise
October 3rd, 2021 8:55am
The most difficult thing about letting go could be the void that the past leaves behind. the best trick is to fill that gap with something you love and bring joy to your soul and those around you! you can go back to a hobby you used to love, and to activity, you stopped doing for a long time because you don't have time for it. This beside you can dedicate the time you earned when the past " left" in learning new skills or doing something you wished you could do one day. You also can dedicate it to the higher good of the community by volunteering or educating or being there for those who are going through the same circumstances. Choose what you love to do when you want, and just do it. Believe that you are your own best friend and best supporter. Support yourself and love it and make yourself happy as long as that won't hurt anyone else. Take good care of yourself do some changes try new things and enjoy the company of everyone because you have no commitment! You can be with anyone you want as you want. Just educate yourself about relationship red flags and consider them in a serious manner when they appear because you don't want to fall into that trap once again. Peace and love for you and best wishes!
soothingShell1220
December 31st, 2021 6:32am
In order to let go of your past you must first acknowledge what has happened rather than try to suppress those events to the fullest extent. This would include being able to point out emotions you feel whenever you associate that past, expressions, and thoughts as well. It would also help if you can talk to a professional whenever those emotions get to the best of you where you cannot function after trying to think about the past. It is also important to reconginze that the past is the past and that you are here to move forward from the past and to gain a new perspective.