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I've not been able to cry for a very long time, and I really need to. Is there a method to induce crying and letting it all out ?

111 Answers
Last Updated: 12/12/2020 at 3:20pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Collin McShirley, LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I love helping people overcome challenges with food, depression, and anxiety. My work with clients is nonjudgement, supportive, and kind.

Top Rated Answers
DragonView2
July 12th, 2019 1:17am
It helped me to go to therapy. Finding someone kind, safe, compassionate, can help a lot. It also helps me to ask the other person for permission to cry, since I used to be punished, criticized, ignored and mistreated for crying. Sometimes we don't cry because we feel too anxious. It can also help to focus on what you felt when you were in suffering while you narrate it, and to try to describe everything as clearly and detailedly as possible, trying to be compassionate to yourself as you do, as if you were a little girl in pain telling you what happened.
Anonymous
August 4th, 2019 4:01am
If it's something specific that I feel the need to cry about, I tend to focus my thoughts on that event or subject of worry and just let the emotions surrounding it come out. It can be overwhelming at first to just let yourself feel sadness, but it can also be a really healing experience. Crying is where you can get all your emotions out freely, and there's always a sense of calm I feel after having a good cry. Sad music helps a lot too, although I don't always need it to start crying. It can really push you to start crying if you're really struggling to though.
MommaBear18
August 23rd, 2019 3:32am
Personally, when I feel like I need a good cry, I like to watch Titanic. It is one of my favorite movies and also always gets some tears out of me. Another thing I do is watch or read sad stories, especially about animals. That always does the trick for me! If animals aren't your thing though, I think that there is a lot to be said for sad music. Luckily, almost every genre has some sad songs. Looking up a playlist on YouTube or Spotify, or even just some lists of sad songs online can really do the trick. Crying is healthy, so I hope you can have a great, healthy cry!
jaylynelora
December 21st, 2019 5:47am
If you're feeling any tension try and recognize that tension and focus on it. Once you've focused on that tension let it out. Letting out your tension by yelling into a pillow or hitting a pillow will most likely allow yourself to cry or get emotional. Let it all out it is a healthy method to get emotional. Crying is good for you it lets off tension or any emotion. There are many ways of having yourself get emotional, If there was a point in your life where you felt hurt emotionally , take yourself back to that feeling and let it out relive that time of your life and make it better. Let your tears flow and let the smile glow after you've relived that moment in your life.
CalculatedDoom
January 19th, 2020 8:27pm
I would recommend sitting in a private room, putting on something sad (movie, music, etc), and relaxing. Find comfort in letting emotions go. Another recommendation is finding something you may find passion in, and practicing it, thinking about a future with said passion. Try going through old items that hold memories, it may trigger emotions and allow them to come out the way you need them to. Throughout these activities please remain as safe as possible! Make sure to have some tissues, a blanket and some comforting items within reach to make sure everything remains under control. Stay safe!
gentleSun78
February 9th, 2020 5:07pm
At first, it needs to be considered where is the reason that you can't cry. If reason is in eyes, you need to see your ophtalmologist. Dry eyes, especially due to long hours behind computer or smart phone can be culprit that you can't cry as your tear glands in the eyes are dried up. You also need to blink regularly with your eyes when behind computer or when you notice that your eyes are dry to provide some moisture to the eyes and to encourage your tear glands to excrete tears. Reasons for inability to cry can be also of mental/emotional nature. In this case you need to see your psychiatrist or therapist to improve your emotional health.
SoulSupporter102
February 16th, 2020 12:31pm
I'm sorry to hear that. It sure is unhelpful and frustrating. It all depends though. Prescribed medication can definitely interfere with our sad emotion, reducing or completely ridding of that feeling to cry. But all in all, I would suggest seeing your doctor about it. I'm no professional, but perhaps your doctor and you can come up with some sort of plan to help you with the feeling of unable to cry. If you don't take medication, it is still a good idea to see a professional about it. Perhaps some mindfulness could help you. If you like I can send you a link for mindfulness.
richuyulin
December 12th, 2020 3:20pm
First find a private safe space (ex. your bedroom) that you can cry in. You body will go into protective mode if you feel the need to hide emotions. Allow yourself to be comfortable with crying. (know that crying is not only for babies, it's natural) Next think deeply about what makes you sad. (ex. others hurting you) Channel that feeling into your mind. Follow that up with journaling your thoughts or perhaps listening to sad music. It could even be a sad movie, or sad anime episode, or sad Youtube video. Whatever you're most comfortable with to help you get in the mood.
Suiginy
August 4th, 2016 7:37am
Listening to a sad song or a song that reminds you of something that makes you sad could work. Watching sad anime, shows, movies, ect
Anonymous
August 6th, 2016 6:47am
Not necessary.. You can try creative methods and letting out everything you want.. We all cry sometimes.. But if you find something else helps you better.. Go for it !
girlDaydreamerr
September 10th, 2016 5:46pm
From my personal experience what hepls is something external that would make me cry,like really sad and depressing(mostly romantic in my case) movie or sad depressing song.
Anonymous
October 5th, 2016 3:28pm
It sounds silly but I hardly ever cry except when I watch movies, so if I feel a build up and I need an outlet I watch a really soppy movie and have a good cry and that usually helps me.
DonaldK
October 19th, 2016 1:14am
It depends on what is blocking your ability to cry, a sad movie with a good ending would help. However, if you are into movies. Try a good book with a sad ending. I know these methods some stupid but they work for me.
ingeniousPeace79
February 25th, 2017 6:45pm
in my case, crying happens quite periodically, and each time is the same pattern, a memory when i was treated unfair (from my point of view), and it felt wrong, like i've been punished by some higher forces. So a negative memory always induces crying easily. Another way is when everything is against me at one moment, and everything feels heavy and impossible. again crying. so myeah, something negative does the trick :D
KaylaReid
March 4th, 2017 7:59am
I find that a good way to release pent up emotions is to lay down and listen to some music. You can also kick back, relax, and watch a movie that you can relate to or a movie that makes all those emotions come out.
rainyAngeldani
March 10th, 2017 2:51pm
Scream. If you can not cry find somewhere you can let it all out without being heard or disturbed. Screaming can help bring out all the emotions. Also, try thinking about things that may make you cry watch sad videos and such. All in all just let it out.
MissyR70
April 8th, 2017 4:59am
Listening to sad songs is one method or watching a sad movie or television show.. Thinking about a particularly sad moment or time in your life can also help.
Anonymous
April 26th, 2017 9:55pm
Just trying to talk about what your sad about might help you. I know that when I talk about what bothers me I tend to break down if that works for you you might cry I hope I could help.
Anonymous
April 27th, 2017 12:08am
Sometimes when I need a good cry I'll think of something sad that happened in my past, or I'll watch a few scenes of a sad movie or read a sad book. It can be very cathartic to have a good cry and I always feel better afterward.
Anonymous
May 4th, 2017 9:42pm
I think it would be immensely therapeutic if you treated your need to cry with reverence and respect (as a necessary emotional response as well as a way to purge excess stress hormone through your tear glands), and block off time. Create a custom ritual where you get in the right state to cry by meditating with for 15 minutes with positive intent and overwhelming self-love. Try out some mantras like "I am my own precious, glorious child" or "complete". The next step could be a comforting bath, or a tear-jerker movie. Don't stress if it doesn't happen--the lacrymal glands can often go offline from disuse. Just be incredibly gentle and nurturing with yourself. Best of luck, and much love.
Secretmama
May 14th, 2017 6:56pm
If you're able to do it, go somewhere that you can be completely alone for a period of time, hopefully a few hours. Have a bottle of water, some tissues and a journal ready to go. Then, try to just let go....
silverUnicorn61
June 4th, 2017 1:01pm
Like many road workers will know that placing a fresh seal over the old road may look new from first glace, but when one drives on it they notice that the pot holes are STILL there. This analogy works in this instance for mental health, as before one can improve, they must get to the root cause of the problem. Short-term cures don't solve long term pain.
Anonymous
June 25th, 2017 7:48pm
You could watch a sad movie or listen to a really sad song. I would suggest 'Terrible Things' by Mayday Parade.
SoulHealing
August 11th, 2017 7:13pm
Just relax and listen to your heart. You cannot force yourself to cry. It will come naturally when you are ready to let it out
Anonymous
September 1st, 2017 7:16am
Are you being troubled by certain situations/feelings/phenomenon? Have you tried consulting a professional to assist you in figuring out your emotional blockage?
TranquilLavenderFields
November 9th, 2017 3:22pm
Often it can be difficult to release our emotions, an alternative way perhaps is to write down our thoughts and our feelings, making us aware of where we are at, creating that sense of release.
Anonymous
November 17th, 2017 6:49pm
I know that feeling I have been through this. I have tried two things which have worked positively for me, first tell somebody to slap you continuously until you break down I know it sounds harsh but it is very important to let your emotions out. Secondly I used to watch the movie of my favourite actor I am so in love with him that somehow when I used to see him, tears will start rolling on their own I know this one sounds crazy but it worked for me. Or you can try watching a very emotional movie.
Anonymous
November 22nd, 2017 7:36am
Sharing your emotions and feelings with someone close to us, helps reduce a lot of stress off our minds.After we share our feelings we eventually feel light weighted this is because in all the darkness a beam of light can light all the way!
koks13
December 14th, 2017 11:57am
Crying is a very important expression. The lesser we cry, the more tend to bottle up our feeling inside. These feelings may start to come in the way of our wellbeing. You can start the process by telling yourself that it is completely ok to cry it out, by letting it all out you are only going to feel better about yourself.
Anonymous
December 21st, 2017 1:40am
I know that feeling. You can try listening to a song that expresses how you feel, or you can watch some heart-touching stories about kindness.