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I've not been able to cry for a very long time, and I really need to. Is there a method to induce crying and letting it all out ?

137 Answers
Last Updated: 06/02/2022 at 12:52pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Sarah Robb, LISW-S (Licensed Independent Social Worker, Supervisor Designation) and LICDC (Licenced Chemical Dependency Counselor)

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

Difficult roads often lead to beautiful destinations. Life poses many challenges. Learning to face, cope with, and resolve these challenges can increase our resilience.

Top Rated Answers
clariceestarling
March 3rd, 2021 8:32pm
Sometimes if I feel like I really want to cry but am unable to, I'll put on a heartfelt movie like "Marley & Me" or something similar, or listen to a sad song to "get in my feels". Usually, for me, after I listen or watch for a little bit and focus on what exactly is bothering me, I'm able to start getting a few tears out. Eventually, that will typically get the cry flowing. After I finish crying, I try to take the time to reflect on what exactly was upsetting me and learn from the experience overall. For me, these situations usually occur when I'm very stressed.
Listeningsarinn
April 1st, 2021 12:51pm
Usually trying to be more friendly and close to your feelings, seating with them, not hiding them and not using the distractions, instead putting it into words either by writing Or talking to a trusted person can help, it does not need to make sense, you can just brain dump and share it all without worrying about making sense... Therapy can be a great help as well if you can consider it... for me personally having that Trusted person come hard on me, even overwhelm and keep questioning me in a sorta cruel manner until i break down Fully and then just hugging me and Staying there helping me put myself back together has helped... a listener can be that trusted person to listen, be by your side and help you get more close to your feelings...
Anonymous
April 15th, 2021 12:57pm
I’m glad you’re open to crying as it is really healthy to get things out from time to time. While I’m not sure for a specific method I do relate to this question and have found that what works for me is watching a sad movie, and listening to a sad song. Be sure not to wallow when the tears start, for me after I’m done crying I take a journal and write down everything I want to let out, just to make sure I fully release. After that I take a nap. Hope this helps, happy crying.
OlivePumpkin444
April 17th, 2021 6:47pm
What I've found that helps is to sit with your emotions and allow them to rise to the surface. Even if you don't always cry, it does help to get in touch with your deeper emotions. With practice, you will be able to better understand the emotions that flow through you on a day to day basis. Along with recognition, you'll be able to pinpoint why you are feeling a certain way at certain points in time. Another method is journaling regularly on your current thoughts and feelings. Inducing a specific response from yourself is not automatic, but becoming self-aware of your emotional self can begin today.
Anonymous
May 8th, 2021 3:59am
Hello there. I would first ask why you feel that you need to cry? Is there another release that may work better for you or be what is needed? Either way, I would offer the idea of what has worked very well for me, meditation. There are many guided meditations available. Depending on what you feel you need to work through, you could find a good fit. These sometimes draw emotion out, again depending on what the focus or guided meditation is taking you through. Best of luck and take care of yourself. Sending good vibes and healing your way.
calmApple67
May 30th, 2021 5:25pm
We all have a build up of emotions sometimes and crying is an outlet for that. I always go to the “why” questions. You could be blocking out some things that you consciously don’t want to address right now. Is it a sad cry, angry cry, or happy cry you’re looking for? For me, I tend towards the angry cry, as I feel I’m not being listened too sometimes. A long car ride to nowhere with a few Adele, Pink or whoever you prefer listening to, cranked up really loud, gets the water works flowing for me. Then I can laugh at myself for being a bit of a drama queen sometimes. Or readdress the person/persons I feel haven’t heard me in a more come manner. And then there’s chopping onions. That works pretty good too.
awesomeMagic45
October 7th, 2021 11:58pm
I write out all the things that have made me sad in a paper. I start with the recent bad incidents that happened to me and work my way backwards. I keep doing it until it's so overbearing to see how much things I have endured. Eventually I break down and cry my heart out because I feel sorry for everything that I have endured in my life. But later, after I have cried, and feels a lot better, I'll just glance at all I have gone through. It also tells me I am strong and gives me the will to carry on. Sometimes the things that break you are the ones that give you the strength to carry on too😊
Compassionheart89
October 13th, 2021 8:36pm
I tend to think that different things work for different people. I used to find that talking about things would help me to 'get it all out'. Another method that I used to use, funny as it may sound, is to watch a sad movie that is guaranteed to make you cry. I tend to find myself moved by films or television so this technique works well for me, but it may not work for you. It may also work to journal. Start to write down your thoughts. Ask yourself what it is that is really hurting you and write it all down. This may well get the tears flowing. I hope that one of these methods helps.
kayvo8
December 3rd, 2021 4:01am
My best way is watching shows that have made me emotional before and typically they continue to trigger me to cry. There is a certain episode of Greys Anatomy that always works for me! Some other people would say that listening to sad music helps. Writing your feelings down in a journal and really digging deep for how you are feeling can also induce an emotional reaction for some folks. If you have support in your life, choosing to talk to someone and be vulnerable about your feelings can also give you an opportunity to cry and shed some tears.
BoooRadley
December 5th, 2021 12:18am
Thinking about everything in life that makes you feel pain or something that you have great pride in. For me it is thinking about great human questions like what happens after death to you. There are many other questions like this it is very different for everybody. another great thing to help start crying with joy is to think about your great memories and the people you shared those memories with an remember the most important people in your life that may or may still be there. There are a large number of other ways to start crying and they are greatly different from person to person.
Anonymous
February 4th, 2022 1:05am
Dealing with unexpressed emotions is tough, and I would like to thank you for reaching out. Reserving times to emotionally express yourself in safe spaces is one method. You can also try to find the root cause of your emotional repression. Sometimes it is a defensive mechanism, and taking time to engage in self care and listen to yourself is sometimes enough to help with this issue. I also find journaling very effective, it is a form of emotional release that allows me to vent and cry by writing everything out so I can look back at it later to continue to process my emotions.
Anonymous
February 11th, 2022 1:44am
I recommend listening to sad music and just letting it go :) Understand that it's ok to cry and be mad about things sometimes. A common thing people feel when they stop themselves from crying is the fact that they thing they shouldn't: "It's just a little thing" "Others have it worse." The only thing you should be thinking about when you cry is the fact that it makes YOU sad, and that's why you cry. It's your emotions and you get to choose how to deal with them :). If this doesn't work, you can try and reflect on what makes you sad. Sometimes understanding the circumstances makes it easier to cry.
Anonymous
February 18th, 2022 8:09pm
Deep core emotional healing can really help. You need a safe space that can be dimly lit and that you can lie down comfortably in. The process is slow breath work. Laying down you slowly breathe into your belly and yourself into the pain, working as long as you need to and giving voice to whatever comes up (even if it feels off course from what is hurting inside at first) Deep belly breathing and vocalizing to supporters who only listen and acknowledge that they hear your pain but don't try to stop you from going through and processing it.
Anonymous
March 2nd, 2022 12:54pm
You could try meditation. Guided meditation on self compassion. You'll find some on 7 cups as well. Under mindfulness exercises.. meditation helps bring emotions to the surface. You can always try talking to someone. Just venting. It's a slow process. Give meditation at least 6 tries 20 minutes each. I hope that works for you. If not I would also like to say you could watch emotional movies but yeah, you need to figure what works for you. Take care. I hope you find a way out and are able to take all of the emotions out.
pastryenthusiast23
March 20th, 2022 8:10am
Not being able to cry is often a subcontious response to some form of emotional damage, or trauma. It often comes with feeling numb in some form, I understand this does not apply to everyone however this may be the case for you. If it is any consolation you may want to try and process things if something had happen in the past, this often requires concentration and careful reflection on whatever event had happened (if one did). Being able to properly process something that has happened previously may well help you with your current issue. Hopefully it is all sorted soon!
kindEagle6616
March 23rd, 2022 10:48pm
Let yourself feel those feelings. Go to a place where you feel comfortable, like your room, and don't hold anything back. I have spent a long time trying to not let my feelings show, but in the end, that is always just going to hurt in the long run. Turn on a song that reminds you of how your feelings and have a water bottle next to you, just so you don't get dehydrated. Crying is normal and remember that these feelings are temporary. Crying doesn't make a person weak, it actually makes someone stronger and in the end it will help a person feel better.
Anonymous
April 16th, 2022 6:27pm
Consider chopping an onion. I used to do that in college when I was really stressed out and nothing else was working. While beginning to chop that onion, start to closely think about the stressful or difficult experiences that have been weighing on your mind lately. Keep chopping (carefully of course), and maybe place your face somewhat close to that onion. Consider buying several types/species of onions in case one type is not potent enough to induce the tears. As you chop, chop slowly: think of it as a mindfulness exercise; keep being open to walking through the difficult struggles or issues you've been up against. Note that the onion method doesn't work for everyone. Don't get discouraged if it doesn't work for you: there are other ways to help induce crying if you're having difficulty. Keep trying!