When will this grief pain stop?

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Last Updated: 01/25/2019 at 9:29am
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Lisa Groesz, PhD


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January 25th, 2019 9:29am
I'm really sorry to know that you are hurting right now. I haven't had first-hand experience of deep grief, but it is something that I have read about in moderate depth in an effort to help my best friend who was facing the loss of a parent. It's a difficult and often overwhelming thing, without question. And then there is the question that feels very real - when will it stop hurting or even, will ever stop hurting. While I would like to assure you that you would feel better, the assurance might be difficult to be felt for real since it's true that I am a stranger and I don't know anything at all about your life other than the fact that you are experiencing grief. But I would like to share one thought about grief that has brought some relief to my friend and for myself in processing the loss of someone precious. It felt slightly better - the pain was slightly eased - when it was thought like "with me continuing my life with love and kindness, I am honoring this person that was so dear to me". "The person is no more, and I am not happy about that fact and I really really wish I still had them with me 'in real' and tangibly. But maybe with my continued living, my life becomes an act of honor towards the person and they get to be present in spirit." I apologize if anything or everything I said makes you feel uncomfortable. I hear your pain and I really strongly wish for you to feel ease.